My heart goes out to you. Please keep your head up and whatever you do, do not stop pushing the issue. I can recall days when I felt just as you do as chronic pain can be so debilitating and depressing. This is why its paramount you get into to see a pain management specialtist.
I would talk to your psych today and impress upon her/him to fax over your records and even give her the numbers. I found (and was given advice here) to be totally honest in regard to your pain, feelings, etc.
Once you are seen by a pain doctor, you will be a totally different person. Once you obtain your appointment with the pm clinic, you communicate your feelings to the doctor and he will ask what you have been on, what worked, what didnt work, etc. I would let your pm doctor suggest what you should start taking.
There are many long acting medications other than oxy and your doctor is aware of all the different treatments.
I am sorry to hear you do not have a support system. I would advise maybe taking your husband to your pm doctor's appointment, thus, him learning about your condition, pain, etc.
I realize its easier said than done, but, try not to be so hard on yourself. You are not being punished and there are people who do care..I would also maybe check into joining a support group so you can relate to people whom have been there. There is nothing better feeling than someone 'validating' your feelings, concerns, fears, etc.
I wish you the best,