I need some advise please - Panic Disorders Message Board

looking4help · 09-18-2003, 07:01 AM

I am a saddened girlfriend of a guy who I met almost nine years ago in high school, we fell in love and been together ever since. The past six months though has been very hard for us. He was diagnosed with what they say is social anxiety and depression. He can't leave the house to go to work or even to the small store in town. The doctor has him on paxil cr 25mg and Ativan . But it just doesn't seem to be working. The ativan does calm him down but the paxil isn't helping. He only takes the ativan when he feels real anxious though. He's afraid of getting addicted to it. Even though he has panic attacks every day.He had his the worst panic attack two nights ago where his whole body locked up. Stiff or frozen is the only way I can describe it. He was unable to move. Anyways, we've told the doctor the paxil is not working but he (dr.) wants to give it two more weeks every time. His medical leave is over next month and they say if he can't work for a straight month he will be terminated from the job he's been at for several years now. Like he needs that pressure on top of everything else! He has lost interest in all the things he loves to do, can't sleep, twitches and shakes all the time, he tells me all the time he feels like he's going crazy, and he talks about leaving me because he says I deserve better than this. PLEASE I love him with all my heart and soul and if anyone has any advise that can help me help him let me know. And if there is anyone out there that has this problem like my b/f and is able to work how do you cope with it at work? And if you can't work or lost your job like he might is there any help out there for this? Thank you for taking the time to read this and any advise is greatly appreciated. My heart goes out to all of you!

Surviving101 · 09-18-2003, 08:37 AM

I know exactly what you are going through. Has something happened in his life that maybe triggered this onset? How long has he been on Paxil? I too lost a job I had for 4 years because of anxiety and depression. That was 10 years ago, it wasn't as talked about as it is now. I was so afraid I was going crazy, I couldn't leave my house, I lost me money and had to file bankruptcy. My 20's were sheer hell. But then I started reading books (try Panic to Power by Lucinda Bassett) and it helped me and I ordered her taped. I'm sure if your boyfriend looks back he may find out that maybe there were events that precipitated this. My best advise is no matter how bad he feels, he NEEDS to start going to therapy, and taking samll trips to the store no matter how bad he feels, it does get better, see it seems from what you are saying that he has precipatory anxiety in other words he fears having another panic attack so he avoids doing thing, and I can tell you from personal experience the more he avoids thing the harder it will be for him to get better. Let me know how things go, keep us posted.

fm5 · 09-18-2003, 10:53 AM

As I mentioned in another thread, there are many things he can do:

Get to a psychiatrist for medication. They can put him on any number of different meds. Go to any anxiety support group meetings in your area. Start therapy. Read this Board. My threads (especially "distracting techniques" are really good to read - on previous pages). Tell him not to retreat from any of his daily activities because of panic attacks (this actually makes it worse). Read books on the disorder.

Tell him all is not lost. Many people (including myself came out of this disorder, but it takes courage and effort on his part).

[This message has been edited by fm5 (edited 09-18-2003).]

09-18-2003, 04:36 PM

I couldn't agree more with FM. I was very resistant to take ativan in the beginning, afraid of getting hooked. But your boyfriend needs to resign himself to the fact that he may have to take it every day, several times a day just to function normally for awhile. Also, Paxil and others like it usually take a month or two to build up in the system and work. What he's going through is totally treatable. I was the exact same as your boyfriend--thoguht I was crazy, panic, anxiety, derealization--you name it. And although I still have problems they are not what they were like when it all first started. My opinion is that he needs to take ativan more so he can start getting back into the world and work, etc. Once he resumes these activities he will get better and probably start feeling more 'normal'. But obviously a doctor needs to assess the situation and prescribe meds. I'm just speaking from my experience. He will get better.

God bless you.

Doug1984 · 09-18-2003, 07:08 PM

Tell him to hang in there on the meds. I too, am on Paxil CR and Ativan. It does take awhile for the CR to work, but it will. FYI, he may have minor setbacks, don't let those get to him. We all have them. It does get better.

God Bless,

Doug