chrislvj

i know it's hard to believe,but it is you that causes you're panic attacks, you can actually set yourself up for panic. this was hard for me to accept,because i was always looking outside of me that was causing my anxiety. i would blaim everyone.i have to be honest with you i had help with the lucinda bassett's program, but everything that she talks about is true. i know of friends that have recovered, and also some who had said it didn't work for them, but had also tryied again and it did work.so just because it didn't work the first time, doesn't mean that trying again isn't,you have to relly want it, and do all she tells you,and beleive it!!!!.when i started her program i was agoraphobic, i couln't talk on the phone, i quit school, i couldn't even check the mail ,probably 1/2 block away. if i got in a car everytime we would stop, i would have a panic attack( bad) i had to be incontrol at all times.......when i would go somewhere i would leave when i wanted to , this was with everything. i had my safe place and that was home. to tell you the truth towards the end i was even panicking at home!!!i finally ordered lucinda's program , i was so anxious it was hared for me to even listen to the tapes .because i couldn't even set still. so it was a challenge.
i've been threw all this to heart palpitations to extreme scary thoughts, even hurting people...i know i would never do it but the thought was so real to me i actually thought i would. lucinda explained all this to me, and i realized i wasn't the only one.
i'll never forget the first thing that i did, i was able to go into the grocery store,not far but just where the gum was and actually stood in line and i didn't pass out,yea!!!!!i did the coping skills she told me to do. i'll tell you it was the hardest thing i could of done, its like you standing under a ball or something that you knew could fall,do you understand? i was shaking emensly and scared i had a panic attack, but i did it, i was so proud of myself .
i learned that actually going out of my safe zone, was the only way of overcomming this illness and knowing that i had total control over my panic attacks i that it was me that caused them. she taought me to see my nagetive thoughts, and how to talk to myself ,gain self esteem,relax, i worked alot , but i finally broke threw it just like millions of other people have. i week later i never had a panic attack again,yea! i learned to stop being scared of them, and that was me that added to the anxiety, and caused the panic. everyone has anxiety, i still do, but never like i did. theirs nothing in this world that can keep stress and anxiety out of you're life ,but now i know it's ok, i let myself feel alittle anxious it's ok.... it's only anxiety. but i can tell myself it's ok, and believe it. it doesn't stop me from anything. i relize this is long and i apolagise ,if you have any questions please ask.