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Old 07-28-2010, 05:52 PM   #1
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Hopeless

Wow...now i really feel hopeless! I have a disease and am not afraid to admit it. I just wish there was a cure for it. I am 23 years old and have suffered with anxiety/ panic disorder for about the past 5 years. It comes and goes and sometimes more bearable than others. Sometimes i will go months and feel perfectly normal and fine and then smack something will trigger a panic attack that will last for months and months because im afraid of having another one. I never really realized it until a few months ago and i went to a counselor and was assessed and told i have gad and am going to start a treatment program which i have no faith in whatsoever. I am not currently on meds but have been in the past and they seem to help a little. I have every symptom you could possibly think of when it comes to anxiety. Recently i have been experiencing a new symptom: A strange feeling in my head. Sometimes it may be on the left side or the top or the right side. Its like it moves from one area to another and it is very agitating and irritating. Sometimes it is very suttle and others so agitating i can barely deal. It makes me unable to focus or concentrate. Its like pins and needles, burning, itchy, tingly sensation. I have had a brain scan and my scalp checked and blood work done and nothing! The only explanation is anxiety? I am trying to get a dr. Of my own so i can get on meds to cope. I am curious as to what is a good med for this disease? I have a 10 month old son and i just feel so bad for him that he such a crazy mom...i mean i totally get the people telling you to just get over it and move on think of something else...easier said than done! I wouldnt wish this upon anyone but no one will ever understand or no what i go through everyday until they go through it themselves. I wake up anxious and depressed i go to sleep anxious and depressed..i try to think differently..i try to be happy! What do i do? Please someone give some answers or advice?

Sincerely,
hopeless

 
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Old 07-29-2010, 05:47 AM   #2
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Re: Hopeless

Hello Hopeless, I'm sorry to hear of you suffering. I suffered with Panic attacks and anxiety disorder for 12 years before seeking treatment. Please get the proper help now, there is no need to suffer. Let me start by saying you are not a crazy mother you are a mom with an illness. Just like any other kind of illnesss. I did not get help because I always thought I was strong enough to get thru it but, that wasn't true, I finally looked at it as I was just to prideful to seek the proper help. I had family members that suffered bi-polar and i was scared of medicines after seeing what they had been thru. I did alot of research on what I was suffering and that helped me alot. Understanding that the feelings and fears were not realistic but, never the less I stilled suffered and so did my family. I went to the doctor and ask for medicine (lexapro ) because the side affects are minimal and it is not addictive. It is a little high priced though. So I am now on Citalopram it works just as well. beleive me when i say you do not have to live like that. i am amazed at the transformation in myself and its great to do alot of the things you have wanted to without fear. Also all the stress can lead to more health issues down the road. Keep us posted and have a great day.

 
Old 07-29-2010, 02:17 PM   #3
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Re: Hopeless

Thank you for your support! I have felt the same way about trying to cope on my own and not taking meds because 1. I have always been afraid of side affects and becoming dependent on a pill. 2. Too much pride. My anxiety has never been as bad though as it has been in the past few months..it has turned into depression and i feel like i am here but my mind is somewhere else. It will not stop. I am scared, confused, and hopeless. I go to my first counseling appointment monday so i will post after then.

 
Old 07-29-2010, 04:19 PM   #4
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Re: Hopeless

I'm not sure 'cure' is the right word because panic attacks are a natural behavior response that anyone can have under stress. It's like saying you are 'cured' from obesity. Panic Disorder is a recoverable condition though.

When I developed PD, I thought I was losing my mind and it was the end for me. I certainly was critical of medication and the treatment process, but actually it helped me fully recover. I no longer live in fear of having panic attacks, and I don't have panic attacks anymore (thank god). If I ever have one in the future, it is no big deal to me.

I started with Zoloft and Ativan. The Ativan mellowed me out until the Zoloft could kick in (which takes a month to three months). I went from having a few panic attacks daily to having a panic attack a week. Then once or twice a month I'd have a mini-panic attack. Then I just didn't get them anymore.

I had to switch from Ativan to Valium and taper off the Valium months ago so I would just be on the antidepressant. While I did have withdrawals for a few weeks, that went away. Now I am on Zoloft alone, and my dose is being lowered slowly until I am discontinued from that (it was just lowered from 75 mg to 50 mg).

It was no picnic. The medications give your body side effects when you first go on them, but they really do subside with time...to my amazement! Cognitive Behavioral Therapy with medication, done correctly, helps a large majority of people with PD recover. The rest, it certainly makes their quality of life much better than it was before.

Hope this helps.

Last edited by ms_mod; 07-29-2010 at 05:22 PM. Reason: Corrected spelling of word so it wouldn't appear as a banned word. Ms_Mod

 
Old 07-29-2010, 07:35 PM   #5
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Re: Hopeless

thanks it does help!! at least i know there is a chance that i will eventually feel better.

 
Old 07-30-2010, 09:17 AM   #6
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Re: Hopeless

You will recover. The only thing you have to accept is that you have to be patient. It does not go away overnight, and it will come and go during your treatment.

Just a note about the medications, you will most likely have side effects when you first start an SSRI. I certainly did...clenched jaw, vivid dreams, insomnia, feeling 'numb', loss of weight. The side effects are intense for the first week, then are gradual over the next couple of weeks. Give it a month to three months (it took me three) and you'll start feeling normal. I've been on an SSRI for a year now and I don't have any side effects.

If I could go back to when I first developed panic disorder and thought I was over, I'd slap myself for worrying so much

Last edited by ms_mod; 07-30-2010 at 09:28 AM.

 
Old 09-29-2010, 05:15 AM   #7
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Re: Hopeless

hi sorry to hear your not well i have suffered with it too only to realise the more you try to rid it the worse it gets i started to say so what if im dizzy when i leave house or if i sweat in a que float with it never fight it also read claire weekes bo0oks she is fantastic x

 
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