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Old 11-03-2004, 04:55 PM   #1
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hayley0610 HB User
shocking update on 10 yr old fighting!!

well something didnt add up and i spoke to my son when we got home he told me simply they were playing football and his friend was trying to get the ball and slipped and accidenatally hit my son and then my son threw the ball to his friend which was beside this boy on the ground and it accidententally hit the boy in the head. then i said what did this boy tell the principal? he said the same thing! that they were just playing and accident. hurt each other. i got a hold of this boys parents one of which is a reverend!! well i talked to the other boy first and asked his version he said the same thing my son did!!! so i said why are u both in trouble if u are telling the princ. the exact same thing? he said he didnt know why!!! i asked if i could talk to his mom and he said sure and i told her what happened and she said she noticed the school is a bit too strict! i told her i thought it was strange that her son was getting the same punishment for this as he didnt know the rules because he was new she said he knew the rules when they went for a school tour the princ. made a huge point of telling him these rules!! so after all this it turns out my son and this boy have done nothing wrong but the princ is believeing what the teacher thought she saw outside. i just dont know how to handle this now im angrier than hell!

 
Old 11-03-2004, 05:20 PM   #2
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Ksavage HB User
Re: shocking update on 10 yr old fighting!!

YOU HAVE GOT TO DO SOMETHING!

You need to get with this other mother and go to the school in the morning. There is no way I would put up with this. I would find out as much as I can from other parents. As far as other disipline that might have been handed out for no reason. We used to have a principle i the town that we live in and he was horrible. He seemed to get off on being able to punish whoever for whatever. The parents had to have several meetings with the school board to get them to realize he was way out of line on several occasions.

Your poor son! That sucks to get into trouble, but it double sucks if you did not even do anything wrong.

I think parents should stand behind a school for punishment, but this is insane. I would make a few phne calls to a few other parents and see if they have noticd anythin out of the ordinary!

Good luck & keep us posted!

Kim
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Old 11-03-2004, 05:35 PM   #3
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siren1024 HB User
Re: shocking update on 10 yr old fighting!!

I completely agree with Kim on this one. It's one thing to be punished for breaking the rules, but when both kids said noone did anything wrong..... that's just unbelievable. I too would get together with the other mother and your kids. There is no way the school will have a leg to stand on with both of you there and both boys telling the same story! I bet you are outraged. I would be!
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Last edited by siren1024; 11-03-2004 at 05:36 PM.

 
Old 11-03-2004, 06:10 PM   #4
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hayley0610 HB User
Re: shocking update on 10 yr old fighting!!

well i am ticked and am not sure how to deal with this in the best way as i know my son hasnt been a model student!! but this is crap. he shows me this letter he got outlining what "happened" and they want him to write out what he did wrong,and why roughhousing is wrong!! but why should he do that?!?!? dh says the qeustions are general and he does need to write about the dangers as yesterday i guess they had a teacher take away their football and thats why they are using the soccer ball as a foot ball! but thats normal sports to me! so now he hasa day off tomm and im going to tell him to enjoy it and im not sure if i should wait until next week for parent interviews or write them a letter or what...i also told my son that he shoudld plainly write out inthis thing that he didnt do anything, i think im going to type up a letter at work tommorow.

 
Old 11-03-2004, 06:41 PM   #5
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Ksavage HB User
Re: shocking update on 10 yr old fighting!!

He should write out the rules of the GAME footbll and add that to this "letter" he has to write.

Maybe he has been a pretty god kid all this time at school and things have just been blown WAY out of proportion. I think I would type a letter yourself and send it to school with him to turn in with his letter.

As another poster stated in your other post "BOYS WILL BE BOYS". These people need to get a grip. Rough housing on the playground is totally different than haveing a shoving match at the lockers and knocking into other students in the hallway.

Being disrespectful is one thing and playing a game in the playground is another.

This si not the best advice to give your son....but I would almost want to tell him that when he goes back to school he needs to have the kids he plays ball with just sit on a bench the entire recess. Eventually an adult should aproach them and ask them why they are not playing. DUH.....when we play, we get kicked out of school!!!!!!

And to think.....if your child is sick they barely give you any sick days w/out a Doctors note & here they kick 'em out for no reason. Makes no sense to me.

Bring out the games mom & let him have a good 'ol time at home tomorrow!
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Old 11-03-2004, 08:32 PM   #6
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Re: shocking update on 10 yr old fighting!!

Please only read if you have time it is the letter i am sending to the school tomm it is very long and rambling lol but if anyone does have an hr or so to read it pls do so and tell me if anything should be changed, also thanks for you help in this matter:

This letter is in response to the incident that happened at the school yesterday regarding nicholas and Graham. After our conversatuon yesterday I had some questions about the situation that i felt needed answering. First I thought it was odd that Nicholas was being given an out of school suspension whilst Graham was only expected to be in during recesses with the reason that he was new and didn't know the school rules. To me a child of that age would know the rules, no matter what other schools he had attended. If he was equally involved in the incident, even blamed for the one starting it, you would think he would be punished the exact same way as the other child if not more for being the instigator.That was my first concern. My second was what really happened. I was under the assumption when we spoke that Nick had been questioned and was perhaps telling a false version of the facts compared to what Graham had said, as you had mentioned Nick was telling events that apparently didn't take place from what the supervisor was saying. It made me safely assume that Graham was telling a different version of the events but after speaking with him I learnt that that was not the case. In fact both of them had told you basically the same story of events. That leads me to believe when 2 people that were directly involved in this event were actually telling the truth. When this happens one would think that the supervisor and their version of events would be directly questioned, as maybe what they thought they had seen was wrong. Also if 2 children in this case are having problems with each other one would think that the other would have no problems telling on the other to make their punishment lighter.

I spoke with Graham last night as well as his mother. I also spoke with Nick and asked him what happened, then I asked Graham and they told me the same thing! they were not able to hear the other ones version of events and when I asked Graham if they told you what really happened yesterday with the same recolection of events he said they were both telling you the same thing. He said he didn't know why they weren't being believed. He then told me his punishment for his role in this which was much less severe than Nick's. They both told me it was a misunderstanding by the person that saw these events happen and that they were just playing with no intention of hurting each other at all or any violent intention.

I am very upset to say the least and feel that this situation did not warrant a suspension or anything other than telling them no sports of this kind should be played on school grounds. I understand the no tolerance rule in the school and respect this rule, when it actually does happen. It is a positive thing that all students should abide by. I am sure Nick has not respected these rules from time to time but I also think he is being targeted and assumed a violent child, when in actuality he is very smart, kind and considerate.The frequent calls I have had from the school I think are completely unnecassary as what they say is true, "boys will be boys" and kids will be kids. It seems they are expected more often than not to behave as adults and have all the common sense adults have. I know Nick is no angel, but we have NO problems with him at home in any violent manner, so I am not sure why this only seems to happen at school. I have taught him and will continue to teach him to stick up for him self and not be pushed around or bullied and I don't really recall a phone call yet saying that Nick has instigated anything with other students, other than the occassion of a girl claiming Nick hit her in the boot room but didn't actually see him do it! Nick just doesn't put up with others tormenting him and he has tried the ignoring and telling a teacher method without any results which leaves him with not many other choices. Perhaps these other children he is having problems with need to be taught not to instigate things with other students.

I am not punishing Nicholas for an event that didn't happen and I fully believe what both boys have told me. He is going to do the assignment you have given him but only to the extent of why rough housing is dangerous, not in the fashion that he did anything intentional. I have explained to Nick that these events must stop as far as his reactions to others. I've told him he needs to stop and think before reacting and it will not be tolerated anymore. I repsect any future punishments given to him by the school when he actually does act out, but I think children also need to be children and learn things for themselves.

Sincerely,

 
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