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Old 11-25-2004, 09:53 PM   #1
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mommaboyz HB User
2 toddlers being mean what do I do?

Hello I have 2 toddlers close to 1 1/2 and 2 1/2 the older one is down right mean to the younger one. pushes him in the floor sits on him bangs his head in the ground ect. they are both boys. The younger one does nothing but cry. It really hurts his feelings. My older one is not a mean kid at all just to his younger brother. Ive spanked him it doesnt work. What else can you do? Hes only 2 and doesnt understand time out ect.
Im also worried becouse Im pg with another baby Im avraid he will do this to the new soon to be baby. I want to stop it now.

 
Old 11-26-2004, 04:27 AM   #2
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MandyAnne26 HB User
Re: 2 toddlers being mean what do I do?

if you don't think he can understand a time out than how do you expect him to understand spanking? All he knows is that mommy is hurting him.
I would definitly put him in time out. At his age he won't stay on his own so it needs to be a playpen or high chair, something he's secure in (their rooms are not a good idea). Leave him there for a few seconds, (maybe 30, not long). I know my 2 year old can understand that she's not alowed to hit. Say things like owie, not nice, etc...tell him to stop hitting, if he continues put him in his time out. Somewhere completly alone, no toys etc. Don't talk to him, just let him cry it out. When you take him out say something like are you ready to play nice etc.
Teach him things like gentle, if you have a pet use that, take his hand and pat really softly and say gentle, nice things like that. If you don't have a pet use a stuffed animal. Eventually he will get the idea.
At 2 kids just don't understand how their actions affect others. He's not mean, he just doesn't know any better at this point. Kids need to be taught empathy and compassion.
As far as the new baby is concerned, get a baby doll if they don't have one...treat it as if it were a real baby, hold it, change it's daiper, etc....let him help out, hold it etc. No, it's not the same as a real baby, but it will help him get used to what it will be like, the kinds of things you will have to do.

 
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Old 11-26-2004, 09:53 AM   #3
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mommaboyz HB User
Re: 2 toddlers being mean what do I do?

Thanks for the reply. Im going to try the playpen idea that sounds good. And the babydoll idea aslo. Thanks again.

 
Old 11-29-2004, 08:10 PM   #4
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Location: Sterling Heights MI
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jbenavides HB User
Re: 2 toddlers being mean what do I do?

I have the same problem with two girls ages 6 and 7 one is mean to the other almost all the time.. but the older one isnt miss innocent either...

I started something new with them that seems to be working. When someone hits, pushes, or does something else mean... the fun ends NOW... for both of them! Its taking a little time but its sinking in but there are beginning to understand that if they continue this pattern of behavior they are both losing out.

I've actually taken them to a fair bought ride passes, and after being there five minutes The youngest one hit the older girl while in line for the first ride. I grabbed them both and ushered them back to the car and took them home! They're still mean to each other at this point but the frequency has cut more than in half. I hope the trend continues.

My biggest problem is the inconsistancy that they get in their discipline. They live with their mom and only see them every other weekend. But even with the amount of time spent, they are mindful that I have my rules, and that my rules RULE... with me at least...

 
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