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Old 07-17-2005, 11:03 AM   #1
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Chellaine HB User
My little boy was molested....

Just this past Wednesday I had filed a police report about my next door neighbors 12 year old nephew fondling my 5 year old little boy. Friday night, I was outside with my son and he was in the front yard, I told him I would be right back, I had to go potty, I came back out and he was gone. I looked for him and finally he came out from beside my neighbors house. I told him that he shouldn't have run off and it was time to come in and take a bath.
While bathing him, I asked him where he was playing and he said in the front yard, I told him I was out there and I couldn't find him. Finally he told me that the other boy took him along side the house. I asked what they were doing over there, he said "He told me not to tell." After a while, I got the whole story out of him and they both had thier pants down and the boy had his fingers in my little boys rectum.
Needless to say, I spent the rest of the night at the police station and emergency room.
I feel sooooo guilty. I feel like I just left him out there for that b@st@rd to pounce on him. My heart is breaking for my little boy. He is special needs, he has ADHD, developemental delay, mild tourettes, impulse control disorder, etc...
Because of his mental disorders, he has a hard time talking to people anyways and he won't talk to the detectives at all. They can not get any kind of a statement from him.
I guess I really don't have a question here, I suppose I just needed to get that out of my system a little.
He has already been going to an outpatient psychiatric facility for behavioral for 2 years, hopefull his case manager there will help him with counceling with this, he trusts her and tells her things. He has a long road ahead.

Thanks to anyone who read this all the way through, I know it was kind of long, sorry.
Chellaine

 
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Old 07-17-2005, 11:07 AM   #2
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cookingmom HB User
Re: My little boy was molested....

Hello,

I just wanted to say I am so sorry for what has happened to your son and for the anguish you must be feeling. Please don't blame yourself. I will pray for both of you. Bern

 
Old 07-17-2005, 07:41 PM   #3
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Re: My little boy was molested....

Pat yourself on the back for taking the right steps in putting an immediate stop to this molestation. Don't blame yourself as cookingmom had said. Because you went to the police there is a chance that maybe this boy can get some help before he goes too far. Whos to say that any sexual predator who started off at a young age ( like this 12 yrold boy) could have been helped in earlier years if they had been stopped by a victim or victims family member. So you did a great thing by coming forward! I am just sorry that it was your son who had to suffer in order for this boy to be caught. You must be beside yourself. Hang in there, my thoughts are with you and your son. Tina
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Old 07-18-2005, 03:18 PM   #4
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Re: My little boy was molested....

Thank you for the replies. Now my son and I are not sleeping very well. He isn't sleeping well, up and down all night, and every move he makes, my eyes fly wide open. He basically stopped eating. He is angry all the time, probably from no sleep. And he still isn't talking. He says that the boy made him "Pinky swear" not to tell and my little boy is holding to that. I have an odd feeling that my boy was threatened too because some of the odd things he had been saying lately that we didn't know where they came from, ie: "I'm going to kill you with a gun" and "I'm going to shoot you in the face with a gun". Hmmm, it makes me wonder.
The more I watch him the more my heart breaks for him. I never let him see me cry, but I certainly do a lot of it.
Thanks again,
Chellaine

 
Old 07-19-2005, 07:07 AM   #5
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Unhappy Re: My little boy was molested....

My heart goes out to you and your family. It is tough with molestation. It makes it harder when they threaten the person. With ADHD and all else they already don't want to talk. Keep talking with him and let him know it is not his fault and you are there for him no matter what. Time will help both of you, some theraphy may be beneficial to you both also. It is not your fault either! The 12 year old needs the help, you guys did nothing wrong by being outside and playing.

I wish you all the healing you need.

 
Old 07-20-2005, 07:44 AM   #6
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Re: My little boy was molested....

Quote:
Originally Posted by TheTwistedOne
here's what I would do. I would go find the 12 year old kid and beat the bloody hell out of him and then leave him on the doorstep of his house for his parents to find him

I agree whole heartedly! I would love to do that, but I can not. Although, I will say that it is pure torture when the kid is over at his aunts house, right next door to me, every day, all day and most of the night. My little boy with all his disorders plus his age, doesn't understand why he can't go out and play by himself or go play with that boy. He has known the boy all of his life. The boy was supposed to be his friend. He just doesn't understand what's going on. My little guy is so confused right now. The detectives won't do anything to that little b@st@rd until my son will finally talk and give a statement. He still won't say anything, he don't know these people and won't talk to them.
Well, take care all.
Chellaine

 
Old 07-20-2005, 08:09 AM   #7
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Re: My little boy was molested....

I am sorry to hear your son won't talk to the detectives. That must be hard on you. You have to try and talk to your son to see if he could talk to them. Can you and a trusted doctor with a detective try doing it with two way mirror and a recorder? I wish you all the best and healing for the two of you. Keep us posted.

 
Old 07-20-2005, 06:02 PM   #8
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Re: My little boy was molested....

i keep having this problem with getting banned, i think it's an AOL glitch, but either way it's getting annoying having to register a new account every few days.

he lives next door and you don't do anything? man, I'd be raising some hell. so what do you think's gonna happen now?

 
Old 07-20-2005, 11:18 PM   #9
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Re: My little boy was molested....

No, he doesn't live next door, his mothers sister lives next door, they are just always there. I just can't say anything yet because they are the type of people to try to scare my son enought to never talking to the detectives.
Also, my little guy decided to open up a little tonight to his older brother, who is 16, and told him some other things that little b@st@rd did to him, and I really feel like hurting that kid right about now. What my son told my other son came down to was that the kid had been sodomizing my little boy. Just typing this, my heart is breaking. I feel it in the pit of my stomach. My baby was being hurt and too terrified to tell me, and that makes me want to hang someone from my great big tree in the front yard! Then I have to look at that little son of a ***** every friggin day. Every time I see him, I about vomit, thinking about what he did to my baby. My 16 year old is working on my 5 year old to talk to the detectives, I think he has him almost talked into it, I hope.
I wish I could just pick up and move, but we own our home and it's just not that easy. It would be so much easier if we rented.
Chellaine

 
Old 07-21-2005, 12:08 PM   #10
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Re: My little boy was molested....

Did you say anything to the neighbor? Maybe they had no idea their nephew was like this? Do they have kids? Maybe the need protection too?? Have the police talked to them? You're in my prayers................

 
Old 07-22-2005, 07:51 AM   #11
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Re: My little boy was molested....

Quote:
Originally Posted by flintrock
Did you say anything to the neighbor? Maybe they had no idea their nephew was like this? Do they have kids? Maybe the need protection too?? Have the police talked to them? You're in my prayers................

Thank you. No, they have no kids of their own. I have not said anything to them because of the way they are. They are the type of people that if you say anything to them about something someone did that you do not agree with, they cuss you out and want you to go out to the street and fist fight, even when it is something as horrific as this. They are not very nice people. They have all hated me since the day I moved into my house 11 years ago, I have no idea why. I have never done a thing to them. They have called Child Protective Services on me 5 times in the past 5 years making false accusations, just because the don't like me. Of course the people from CPS come into my house and laugh at the outrageous charges, but of course, they have to do their job and come out, taking them away from the children that really are being abused. So, no, I haven't said a word, if I do, they will be screaming an scaring my son into never speaking about it to anyone again.
Take care and thank you,
Chellaine

 
Old 07-22-2005, 06:31 PM   #12
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Re: My little boy was molested....

Perhaps you should call CPS on these people. That boy had to learn his behaviour from someone. Perhaps he is being abused as well. Anyway, if CPS finds anything at least that boy will be gone.
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Old 07-22-2005, 10:30 PM   #13
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Re: My little boy was molested....

Quote:
Originally Posted by anakalia
Perhaps you should call CPS on these people. That boy had to learn his behaviour from someone. Perhaps he is being abused as well. Anyway, if CPS finds anything at least that boy will be gone.
The night I took my little guy into the police station and the hospital, the police not only called victims assistance and child advocacy, but cps as well. So, they have already been notified, but, they can not do anything until my son gives a statement.
Chellaine

 
Old 07-22-2005, 11:23 PM   #14
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Ellecram HB User
Re: My little boy was molested....

Have you looked into any local agencies that specialize in sex offending/victimization?
Many of them have therapists experienced in helping children who have been victimized. Generally the mental health counselors have limited knowledge in this area.

 
Old 07-22-2005, 11:44 PM   #15
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Re: My little boy was molested....

I'm not one to cause trouble....but what about talking to your neighborhood? If I lived next to you with my two little boys (4 and 1) I would want to know about this. Maybe they have children that also have fell victim to this freak. I know it's private, but you could just say there has been inapropriate behavior with small children and you are concerned. Not only could this warn the other families, but also help you fight back with the scum that targets you. Proof or not....this is nothing to give the benefit of the doubt on. I'm not saying picket their house, but better safe than sorry.

Shame on those people. Hang in there. My heart breaks for you and your little boy. Perhaps a little break from the questioning would help him????? I'm no doctor, just a thought.

 
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