Ugh i dont know where to start!! we have found towels in his room with the smell of urine we thought maybe it was our cat but we dont think it is. my dh informed me that sometimes boys pee instead of ejaculating. the thought just makes me cringe but i guess its life. i just dont understand this but he tells me its normal. we know our 14 yr has been doing it for a long time now and have given him "ideas" on how to be discreet about it but my 11 yr old is still in my eyes my little baby! i have no problem with him doing this dont get me wrong its just that i get this visual and it isnt nice! so tonight my dh brought it up and gave him some "ideas" at which my son just grinned and didnt deny he was doing it. what now?
I guess now you wait and see if he takes the advice or not. I don't know what to tell you about getting that visual out of your head. I'm not looking forward to my son reaching puberty...lol
If he continues to leave messes, perhaps DH could have a (slightly akward) conversation with your oldest and have HIM mention it to his younger brother. Does he take advice or confide in his older brother? That might help.
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"Go slowly, breathe and smile" Thich Nhat Hanh
I think your DH needs to grow up a little bit if he's turning the situation into a joke "between the boys". A little respect for the fact that there's a woman in the house would be nice.
I wouldn't worry about such a thing, I've heard of people starting before they're five. At such a young age I bet they don't even know what they're really doing and don't know what's wrong with doing it, which really... there's nothing wrong with it, it's natural. I'd just try and educate him and get over those mental images.
Masturbation has been shown to start in the womb!! It's not usually about sex for kids, it's just about discovering something that feels good, usually by accident. Geez, it's not like he's going out and having sex!'
To the original poster, maybe your hubby needs to have a talk with him about being discreet about it. Sounds like your son thinks it is a funny joke and doesn't realize it is something he needs to be more private about.
Last edited by Administrator; 07-06-2006 at 03:46 PM.
Reason: do not chastise other members!
My son is 18 and I've never seen evidence of stains anywhere. He's very young for his age and, although I'm sure he touches himself, I'm not sure if he "knows" you're supposed to keep going until 'something happens'. I just couldn't imagine having an 11-year old masturbating until he orgasmed! Good god, he's got the rest of his life -- why should children be doing this?
Sorry if this sounds blunt, but if he's 18 and hasn't yet figured out that "something happens" eventually, there's something very wrong with him, either mentally or physically. Most boys figure that out by the time they're 12 or 13. You're fooling yourself if you think otherwise.
No, there's nothing mentally wrong with him. He's an only child and is a late bloomer, naive, immature and not streetwise. If he has reached orgasm, I don't know where he put it because I've never seen any of his clothes or bed wet or stained.
Perhaps he could be using tissue, and cleaning it up better than you know!
I knew an ex-boyfriend of mine that used an old sock when he was much younger and still living at home to clean up with and would clean it himself so that he was never caught...
My son is 18 and I've never seen evidence of stains anywhere. He's very young for his age and, although I'm sure he touches himself, I'm not sure if he "knows" you're supposed to keep going until 'something happens'. I just couldn't imagine having an 11-year old masturbating until he orgasmed! Good god, he's got the rest of his life -- why should children be doing this?
it has nothing to do with age, it's a natural part of being human. Geez people, this isn't the Victorian era.
I have no problem with my 18 year old pleasuring himself....I get disgusted when I think of someone under the age of 13 doing it. Can't they remain childlike and have something to look forward to when they're older? Do they have to experience it all at such a tender age?
I'm just saying its not something young kids are really aware of as an "adult" activity. It's not the same as sex. Just because you might not have grown up doing it doesn't mean others weren't. i remember doing it when i was 4 or 5 and it had nothing to do with sex, I didn't really know what it was, I just knew it felt good.
Besides, you have to remember that kids are reaching puberty MUCH sooner these days then they used to. It certainly doesn't mean they no longer have a childhood if they masturbate. Yeah, maybe it's gross to think about someone that young doing it, but it's also gross to think of your parents having sex - doesn't make it wrong though!!
I have no problem with my 18 year old pleasuring himself....I get disgusted when I think of someone under the age of 13 doing it. Can't they remain childlike and have something to look forward to when they're older? Do they have to experience it all at such a tender age?
To children there is nothing wrong with this, it doesn't "take away" anything from their childhood or cause them to become less childlike, like I said, they don't even know what they're doing so it hardly connects to something wrong. They haven't even had sex-ed yet. There mentality doesn't change just because they may have caught on a little sooner to doing something that makes them feel good. Like mjewell posted; it has been shown to start in the womb.
Masturbation and sex are two very different things in my mind but it seems people in here are treating them like one in the same almost. I think the only problem here is that of society.
I can understand a child 'accidently' touching himself and thinking mmm, that feels good, but going on to something else after a few seconds....you know the attention span of a child. I can't imagine a child going and going until they reach orgasm! Gosh, that wouldn't even occur to me at that age! My first orgasm came during intercourse at age 18 and I didn't even know what it was! I had never felt that incredible feeling before and it was maybe a year later that I had read the word 'orgasm' in a magazine and realized "so that's what they call that". Children having orgasms, to me, is like seeing them smoking....without the health hazards, of course. It's simply something they don't need to be doing that young. That's my opinion and I'm sticking with it.
i started masturbating at 11, well one day before i turned 12. it was on accident too. it felt good and i kept messing with myself and then all of a sudden OOPS! i didn't know what i had done and it freaked me out. my older brother told me what exactly it was.
