Re: does it ever stop hurting
i am only 24, and my children are only 4 and 1, so i have no idea what you are going through. i can't even imagine what it must feel like. i don't think it is that people don't care, it's just they don't know what to say.
i don't know what to tell you except that i will pray for you and that your children will someday realize what they are missing.
i got married at 17, not because i had to, but because i was in love. we have been happily married now for 6 years, so i really didn't live with my parents when i was an adult. i think it may be that they are just trying to find themselves as adults, what their purpose is, and what makes them happy. they may not want you right there to point out their mistakes as they make them. or are ashamed of what they are doing and don't want you to know. i don't know, but hopefully they will return, maybe not to live, but to have a relationship with you.
i guess the only advise i could give is to be positive, if ever you see them or talk to them, always make sure it is in a positive way, let them know you miss them and will always be there for them. try not to be negative and tell them what they are doing is wrong (even if you feel that way) if they know they have your support and love no matter what they are doing, they will feel like they can come to you. and in the same way, try not to be negative to people who may repeat it to them.
like i said i don't understand and can't even imagine the hurt. but in answer to your title, does it ever stop hurting, as a mother, i imagine not. no matter what, you will always be their mother and will always care what is going on with them, but hopefully you won't have to worry about it hurting too much longer, hopefully they will come back. that is my prayer for you.
take care and you will be in my prayers,