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Old 05-08-2007, 01:33 PM   #1
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problem with grabbing phone

My 4 year old dd doesn't let me talk on the phone. She dragged it from my hands and talks to people herself. After that, she may give it back to me or hangs it up. I will be on-call i.e. I can get urgent calls about work issues any time and have to talk really quickly with busy people and fix the problem. It will be totally unappropriate if she grabbed the phone and can lead me to troubles at work.
My dh is working different shift, so I am alone with her which is fine most of the time.
Any suggestions are welcome.

 
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Old 05-09-2007, 08:44 AM   #2
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Re: problem with grabbing phone

Look into a baby gate.. Gate off one room with the phone as your space and office. Your daughter must stay out and respect your space.. make a small space that is all hers in return. Give her an old cell phone.. let her play pretend, but pop that hand or what ever you must to keep the child from the phone otherwise... You can also set up scheduled call dates for her like to the grandparents and an aunt or uncle.. these can be her business calls.

The police may show up at your door when she decides to call 911 and tell them that bad people are outside.. or call 311 and sing the ABC's to the lady that takes down emergencies like fallen trees and such..

The police only showed up once and my three year old told them that the bad people he had called about had been hitting each other outside. What was he talking about.. I was mortified and the police officers were trying hard not to laugh.. well my son saw our neighbors kids wrestling in our front yard through the window, they got really rough about it and my son was sure they were bad because hitting is bad.

How can you argue with logic like that? He had the right idea, but we had to apologize to the police officers and explain the whole when to use the phone and not scenario in explicit detail.

Enjoy.
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Last edited by mkgbrook; 05-09-2007 at 08:46 AM.

 
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Old 05-09-2007, 09:07 AM   #3
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Re: problem with grabbing phone

Can you move the phone to somewhere out of reach?

While my dog still had her baby teeth I had to move the phone to the top of the fridge

And the idea of a separate "mommy space" is excellent. We always had one room that was neither puppy nor baby proof, and that was the office. I love baby gates.

 
Old 05-09-2007, 10:01 AM   #4
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Re: problem with grabbing phone

If she takes the phone out of your hand, take it back. She's 4 and you are the adult. When you are off the phone put her in a time out. Let her know she cannot do that without consequences.

The baby gate is a great idea. If she climbs over it, just step over it again and she'll have to climb again.
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Old 05-09-2007, 11:03 AM   #5
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Re: problem with grabbing phone

Quote:
Originally Posted by PinkPiglet View Post
If she takes the phone out of your hand, take it back. She's 4 and you are the adult.
I absolutely agree.

 
Old 05-09-2007, 02:41 PM   #6
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Re: problem with grabbing phone

I don't know the reason, but most children seem to act up when a parent is on the phone. We call it "phone-itis". My girls always seem to want to talk to me urgently then or do things that they know they aren't supposed to do, like walk across the couch or something. They become silly or disruptive and depending whom I'm talking to, it can differ on how I handle it. If it's a business like call I can give the "look" or put up a finger or hand to let them know it's an important call. If it's a social call, I correct them immediately.

But they have never grabbed the phone from my hands while I was using it. That would be the first and last time it would happen! I don't understand why you would allow that? In that case, I would take the phone back, tell the person you must deal with your daughter, hang up, and take care of it at once! Then call the person back after she understands. She knows you're not going to do anything, so she keeps it up. To her it's a game! Cut the conversation off and take care of her one time, and I'm sure she'll remember the next time. She four years old...old enough to understand that it's not acceptable, but you need to be firm and teach her that.

Like I said, most kids have "phone-itis" and we all deal with the silliness that comes with that. But grabbing the phone is totally unacceptable and you need to be consistent and firm. Like another post said, you're the adult!

 
Old 05-09-2007, 05:52 PM   #7
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Re: problem with grabbing phone

I think the reason why it has become such a problem is because you've allowed her to do it continually. If you would have shut her down the first time she did it, she would know it was unacceptable and it was not allowed. But I guess all you can do now is start from this point and move forward.

If she does it again, tell the person on the phone that you will call them back and deal with your daughter right then and there. Punish her with a time out or whatever, and make her understand that this is not acceptable behavior. I think it's very important to stay consistant with children because otherwise they will think they can get away with everything. If you punish her every time she does the unacceptable behavior, she will learn that it's a no-no.

I'm sure she will get the point eventually. Kids are a lot smarter than adults give them credit for, you know?

 
Old 05-12-2007, 10:46 AM   #8
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Re: problem with grabbing phone

Galinaqt, who is in control in this relationship? My children wouldn't dare grab a telephone out of my hands.

 
Old 05-15-2007, 10:41 PM   #9
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Re: problem with grabbing phone

Unless, you set the rules, she will think that she rules. She is probably wondering who is really in control in the house, you or her. She NEEDS you to DISCIPLINE HER. She needs you to show her what is right. When people call you they are not looking to talk with a 4 year old. It has to be very annoying to them. If she can do this at 4 what is she going to be doing at 14. You better take authorithy over this situation now. She is the child and you are the mother. No, child of mines would ever grab the phone out of my hand, if they did it would be their last time. I wonder what else she is doing. I say stop that behavior now. Give her a toy phone and tell her never grab the phone again.

 
Old 05-16-2007, 02:34 AM   #10
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Re: problem with grabbing phone

I would buy a toy phone for her and a wireless for myself. But most important of all, I would teach her how to answer the phone and then bring it to me. My kids love doing this. They feel important just to say "hello".

 
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