Potty Training Advice Desperately Needed - Parenting Issues Message Board

Greenberry · 11-06-2002, 07:14 AM

My daughter is 25 months old, and I have been reading everywhere that around age 2 is the best time to begin potty training. I have been working on this for a week with my daughter, and after one week, there has been almost no progress in this area. In the past seven days, she has peed in the potty exactly 4 times (a few drops each time), and I have not even been able to get her near the toilet for No. 2 (she is pretty regular in that aspect, so I usually know when it is coming, and she WILL NOT get anywhere near the bathroom). I have tried putting her on the toilet as often as every half hour to hour, and she sits there, does nothing, and then I put the diaper or Pull-up back on her, and she immediately goes in it.

What do I do? Is the problem that she is just not ready yet? She really doesn't seem to get it, but I keep reading things about "all children can be potty trained by age 2 if their parents are willing to work hard enough." What do they mean by working hard enough? Believe me, I have done very little else in the last seven days except for taking her to the potty and I don't see how I can work any harder. I really don't relish the thought of changing a 4 year old's diaper, which is what I see in my future. Every other transition in my daughter's life has been totally flawless, but this one is turning out to be pretty tough! I have tried putting the potty seat next to the toilet and trying to get her to go when I do (which is very frequent since I am pregnant), rewarding her with stickers and candy, asking her frequently if she needs to potty (she is in the NO phase right now, so the answer is always NO). Will more effort on my part make her "get it" or do I just have to wait until she is ready? I had hoped that she would be totally potty trained by January because the new baby is due in April, and I wanted her to have some time pass between accomplishing the potty training and the arrival of the baby. Please help!

looking4relief · 11-06-2002, 09:32 AM

I am going through the potty training nightmare also my daughter is 20 months and I just found a tip from a friend of mine that might help you also.She told me to buy a package of silkie undies and put them on before you add the pullup or diaper it is a bit nasty at first but the good part is when they do go in the diaper it will not just absorb it will lay against there skin in the panties and they are miserable...it has worked with my daughter without to many accidents.GL

Chelle1977 · 11-06-2002, 10:14 AM

A trick that my mother used when she was babysitting (which is what allows me to remember it) was buying "big boy underwear" (or big girl in your case) with neat characters on it. The boy she was watching only got to wear them if he used the potty. If he had an accident he had to go back to the pull-up/diaper thing. I don't remember the results, but I remember the method.

I week doesn't sound like that long of a time. Letting her see you do it and you're encouragement should allow her to get used to the idea I would think. No expert, myself. Good luck.

lovelyme · 11-06-2002, 01:26 PM

I SWARE BY THE JELLY BEANS!!!!!!! I have got more friends of mine to pottie train successfully with jelly beans. I am proud to say I started the fad and not to worry you can buy sugar free jelly beans. I would take my daughter to the toilet and tell her that if she went I would give her 2 jelly beans. Sometimes 2 for poop and 3 for pottie since pooping is easier to learn than urinating in the toilet. Bowel training usually comes first. So we had a specific cupboard that they stayed in so she knew where they were and what there purpose was. She trained in 2 weeks and hardly ever had accidents after that. My friend did it with Dum Dums and I told her that she should tape them to a poster board or wall near or in the bathroom as a guide like, pottie = 2 lolly pops and poop = 1 lolly pop. Stickers worked just as good. I gave my friend a bunch of jelly beans when her son was having trouble and she thought I was nuts, but it worked and so she has passed on the fad. The first thing people think is, "Candy is bad for their teeth and will make them hyper", when in fact sugar does not have as profound an effect on kids as people might think AND if candy is bad for their teeth how good could being in diapers be at age 4. Their skin's PH changes and that is not good to have happening into later ages. Don't push her, but make the beans visible to her at first to let her see her reward in advance and it may prompt her to want to try and go. It is so simple and think it fun for the kids too. I mean after all pottie training is not really much fun so lets make the best of it.

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Marie

Greenberry · 11-06-2002, 02:48 PM

Candy has not worked so far. She thinks she gets the candy if she just tries, and usually ends up hysterical when she doesn't get it. I have been giving her candy every time she does go, but it does not seem to be sufficient motivation for her.

I will try the underwear-under-the-diaper, though! Her doctor kept telling me to start putting her in regular underwear, but I just kept envisioning our furniture and NEW CARPET getting peed on constantly, so I really didn't want to do that. It really never occured to me put a diaper on over the underwear. I will definitely try it! And I am trying a variation of the second suggestion--she gets to wear a Pull-up (which we call "big-girl panties") if she succeeds, but if not, it's back to the diaper. It hasn't worked so far, but I've only been trying it for a day or two.

Thanks for all of the suggestions!