6yr old son Impulsive! Kicks other kids! how do i punish? - Parenting Issues Message Board

cmelanieb · 09-29-2003, 02:30 PM

Hi,
I am a single mom of a sweet 6 yr old boy. He is very giving and compassionate, he will share anything with anyone and is polite. My problem is that for the last couple weeks he has been getting into trouble at school, He has been in the principals office twice for kicking other boys in his class. when asked why he does this he says he doesnt know... I am very afraid that this is a sign of him being troubled or ADD <--He is struggling with learning to read and sit still. I would love advice on Disciple, solutions and opinons on how i should handle his school staff (they have been nice so far but what if I have to talk to them again? I am worried that They might label him a trouble maker.) I realize that others have worse problems then this with their children but this is a big worry for me because I want to avoid any future problems with him that might be harder to solve. Thank you in advance.

momof3mjt · 09-29-2003, 06:37 PM

What grade is he in? Did he go to this school last year and were there any problems like this before?

If not, you need to look into what is going on in the classroom, find out if he has any new friends and that they are like, find out if someone is bullying him. You can set up a meeting with the principle and the teacher. Most schools are willing to do this to help the child. Let them know you are willing to do what needs to be done to help your child and ask them for suggestions on how to handle this. Usually, they have been to workshops and trainings on discipline and behavior problems.

If the problem doesn't seem to be with something at school, then you need to get to the bottom of it with him. If he won't budge you might have to get some tough love for him for a little while. Ground him if he gets in trouble at school, and reward him if he has a good day. Maybe start by the day...(if he has a good day with no trouble, take him for an ice cream after school) After a week or so of daily reinforcement, make it ..if he is good all week. Talk to the teacher if you try this, let her know what you are trying, and then ask for a daily report at the end of the day.
She will LOVE IT that you are taking an interest and trying to work things out!!

Trust me on that, I am a preschool teacher, and right now I am working with a special needs child, and we are having to do some behavior modifications. And his mom is all for helping, and we love it!!

If it keeps getting worse, you can ask for an SST, (student study plan) or a behavior plan, and ask for a behavior specialist. If your district has one.
And don't feel bad if you have to bring a counselor aboard. Anything you do now will help your child succeed!!
Lindy

cmelanieb · 09-30-2003, 08:25 AM

Thank you so much for the info and encouragement lindy. I talked to Brady and he says that he is picked on and he is just retaliating, I told him that violence isnt the way to solve anything and to go to his teacher and point out the child that is picking on him so that she can keep an eye on things. (i also wrote her a note telling her what i told him). I am worried because I am now thinking that maybe he feels like the outsider and friendless. He told me this morning he hates school and has no friends, I questioned this because he has tonnes of friends around home. I told him to maybe invite someone from his class to eat lunch with him and am hoping he will. I really can not believe that we are having this problem already! He is only 6! How do i turn this around? how can i help him to enjoy school? I am in university and was hoping that he would like school at least enough to go to college. Am I worrying for nothing? Will this change? How can I change it? LOL, being a mom is hard on my heart! LOL

IHATEMEME · 09-30-2003, 10:42 AM

I feel very strongly he obviously doesnt know what harm he's doing give him one good kick in the *** and he'l never do it again

gillian30 · 09-30-2003, 12:25 PM

I hope the above was meant as a joke. Real cute.