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Old 03-07-2011, 05:51 AM   #1
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Singapore
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engee HB User
aggressive 6.5 yr old son

Hello,

I have been trying to read and understand and learn to be a better parent each day.I thank my 6.5yr old son for that.

Since 2yrs he has been showing aggressive behavior.Used to pull out my hair
hit his dad in his eyes.I accept that we were unaware he was having some issues.His father travels a lot for his job(he is an Architect).I used to miss him and i used to cry in front of the child whenever my hus had a trip coming up.
Not at 6.5 yrs we decided that we needed help and he went through 8 sessions of sand play therapy + art therapy+play therapy.
He had transformed into a very happy,gentle child.Then we had to go for vacation to my native and I could see that he was gradually turning back to the old track.He has a 16m old brother whom he adores but when he gets nasty its really nasty.
The counselor said that adults should be reasonable with kids and his fathers absence and my helplessness has caused this.This anger is targeted only at his family which means its our lack of proper discipline.Since his father never saw much of him he used to get our son lots of toys and stickers.We used to give in.You could say we were afraid of loosing his love but after reading through a a lot of parenting blogs I have understood that love and discipline don't work this way.
We have now started the counselling and she says it might have to go on till he is mature enough to understand what works where.He is a very brilliant kid and his teachers like him a lot.
We have rules at home now and we are very strict with the consequences(loosing his fav toy/colors/TV time/play dates).

My worry is that after 8 wonderful sessions he retraced his way back.I could not control the situations at my home and it was very difficult to get everyone to be reasonable with him.I might have to go to my home in a month's time and we are anxious if all hell is gona break loose again.....yes the rules and consequences and discipline is on ....what else can i do....

I am really sorry to brag but I have been trying to understand how to go about...we want a happy child.he is so sad and hurt.His father is now trying to switch jobs to be at home more.

Thanks to all for your time,for stopping by.
God bless.
engee

 
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