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brutus56 11-18-2012 08:27 PM

Single father
 
I'm a single father raising a 14 yr old boy.In the past yr my work forced me alittle farther from home.This forced my son to be on his own ,get him self to school ,sometimes make his own dinner etc...I worry about him so much and the guilt of not being there to get him off school was overwhelming.I started to worry so much that know i worry about everything along with anxiety.I don't know what to do ,i have to stay strong for my son ,but my life feels out of control.Just want some positive input.Thank you

Stupid feet 11-18-2012 08:34 PM

Re: Single father
 
You're doing the very best you can!! Your son gets himself to school when needed and is able to take care of himself. Look at the boy you have raised! He's independent and does what he's supposed to do. I'm sure he understands that you have to work to support him. Don't beat yourself up, talk to him and make sure he understands why you can't always be there! It sounds to me like you're doing a great job!!

brutus56 11-18-2012 08:43 PM

Re: Single father
 
Thank you your probably right .I just want the best for him its just been tough especially now that he's a teenager.It adds alittle bit to my stress.I know what i was doing at that age but my mom was always around to put me in check.He doesn't have that.Thank you again for your input anything helpful.

ibake&pray 11-19-2012 08:24 AM

Re: Single father
 
[COLOR="Purple"][FONT="Verdana"]It sounds like you are doing the best you can for your son. But you also remember what it was like at that age. I have raised two sons and also know of the temptations that float around. Is there someone in the area that could call him and check in with him, or is there an older adult who might like to have a visit from a young man every so often. If he knows he has other adults in his life who are caring and checking on him, there will be less of a chance that something will happen. It's just a thought.....and keep up the great job...it owuld nice if someone could cook meals for him also....again, jsut a thought..[/FONT][/COLOR]

brutus56 11-19-2012 09:14 AM

Re: Single father
 
Thank you for the reply.I do have outside help from my mother ,but she's been helping me from the beginning .I think she's alittle burned out.He's a good kid i just worry to much i guess.

Rett8332 12-15-2012 05:15 PM

Re: Single father
 
A big hug for Dads who are raising their kids on their own~ It's tough, and it's a rough world out there as well. Do you have any family members who can stop by, spend a night etc. with your son when you are away ? Close friends who could do that ???? Might ease your mind a little just knowing he's in good hands when you can't be there! Hang in there Dad~

mommyfix 03-24-2013 03:33 PM

Re: Single father
 
Brutus, I was a single mom of a 14 year old once...lol. He's 27 now and turned out brilliantly. He also had to get himself up for school in the mornings as I had to be at work by 7am and didn't get home til 5:00. He became very independent and liked it. He now is married with a 4 year old daughter and just finished putting himself through university with no financial help from me. His wife works to pay for food and utilities, but his part time job as a waiter/bartender pays the mortgage and tuition. He has been doing this for 5 years. He is incredibly busy but seems to thrive on it.
You say your son is a good kid, I say that is a reflection on your skills as a parent. That is what you need to hold on to and keep telling yourself whenever the guilt and worry become overwhelming.
I am sometimes frantic that my son is taking on too much, but he has a specific goal in mind and will not let anything get in his way of achieving it.
I believe this has alot to do with his being forced to become independent at a fairly young age. Just be there for advice and encouragement.


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