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Ssayres 01-31-2013 01:34 PM

Need advice 15 y/o son trouble at school
 
I've never posted on a message board. I am in need of some advice. Telling people close to you sometimes doesn't work. My son is not a bad kid. He is very intelligent. He is an only child. Lately I have been overwhelmed with emotions. He has been so hateful to me and disrespectful. I told my husband the other day giving into him all the time when he was little...if I could go back ad do it over again I would have definitely placed boundaries and made sure there were lines that when crossed suffered a consequence. I feel he has no fear of my husband or I. He sees himself as an equal. He will stand up to my husband and myself and not back down.
Today I got a call from the principal saying he activated an emergency sprinkler system in science. He then proceeded to lie about it and say he was shoved into it. They have him two days of in school suspension. One for the activation of the system and the other for lying. I almost feel I'm more upset and disappointed with him for lying. He says he shouldn't be punished at school and at home. I disagree. I'm just not sure at this point how to punish. I called my husband and told him so he could have some time to think about the situation and not be bombarded when he came home and let his emotions get in the way. Since this is the first time he has done anything like this at school I feel it is justifiable to punish him here too.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated from other parents with teen boys, sometimes I just feel like its all going wrong. Things have changed so much with him in the past few years. He's changed so much.
I feel sometimes I don't know who he is anymore.
Thanks for reading.

caz52 12-30-2014 11:39 PM

Re: Need advice 15 y/o son trouble at school
 
[QUOTE=Ssayres;5126006]I've never posted on a message board. I am in need of some advice. Telling people close to you sometimes doesn't work. My son is not a bad kid. He is very intelligent. He is an only child. Lately I have been overwhelmed with emotions. He has been so hateful to me and disrespectful. I told my husband the other day giving into him all the time when he was little...if I could go back ad do it over again I would have definitely placed boundaries and made sure there were lines that when crossed suffered a consequence. I feel he has no fear of my husband or I. He sees himself as an equal. He will stand up to my husband and myself and not back down.
Today I got a call from the principal saying he activated an emergency sprinkler system in science. He then proceeded to lie about it and say he was shoved into it. They have him two days of in school suspension. One for the activation of the system and the other for lying. I almost feel I'm more upset and disappointed with him for lying. He says he shouldn't be punished at school and at home. I disagree. I'm just not sure at this point how to punish. I called my husband and told him so he could have some time to think about the situation and not be bombarded when he came home and let his emotions get in the way. Since this is the first time he has done anything like this at school I feel it is justifiable to punish him here too.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated from other parents with teen boys, sometimes I just feel like its all going wrong. Things have changed so much with him in the past few years. He's changed so much.
I feel sometimes I don't know who he is anymore.
Thanks for reading.[/QUOTE]

Hi if it is any consolation I am going through some very hard times with our teenage Daughter as well,I too dont know her much anymore

caz52 12-30-2014 11:42 PM

Re: Need advice 15 y/o son trouble at school
 
Hi if it is any consolation I am going through some very hard times with our teenage Daughter as well,I too dont know her much anymore!

Karin8312 03-23-2015 03:05 AM

Re: Need advice 15 y/o son trouble at school
 
You must be facing a lot of problems with your teenaged son, I can understand from what I read. But I would like to add here that your son is growing up, he is neither too young nor a grown up adult. He is in the middle phase. So, you need a lot of discretion when tackling such a situation. First and foremost, do not raise your hand or punish him. Try talking to him. Start talking to him casually like you did a couple of years back when he was much younger. In the process try understanding his emotions, try to establish a link with what is going on in his mind and how his actions are related to it. It may be possible that you succeed in understanding your child's emotions. Hope you succeed.


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