Kaitie

I am so mad. *phew* had to get that one out. No seriously though, I am really mad and upset and so exhausted I just want to cry, infact I am crying - which really sucks because I'm at school in front of a whole bunch of mature 'adults' who can obviously handle this course load, whereas I definately CANNOT.

I am so mad at my boyfriend right now I don't even want to see him, of course he's in the same program as me, and well - he wonders into my classes occasionally. Today I was so happy to see him, then things didn't go exactly as planned becuase he didn't help me on my site plan exactly as planned and now I'm so mad I just don't want to see him. I tried to get him out of my class. Now he's all peeved at me saying that I "shouldn't take (my) bad moods out on (him)".

I was walking down the halls today and a whole group of trades students said (under their breath to me) -
"I wonder what had to breed to make THAT". I'm not an ugly girl. Sure I'm ******* tired - and probably don't look the greatest but that was just so bloody mean!

And Just to give you an idea of my stress and workload...

ALL DUE TODAY BY 5:30 -

-Civil Engineering assignment
-Stair floor plan and elevation
-Site Plan
-Three different Autocad Assignments
-Physics Assignment
and last but not least - Math homework.

I'm so tired of this - you know that feeling when you look straight ahead but it looks like everythings still moving? THAT type of tired - I can't focus, I missed a whole morning of notes and yeah...make it stop!

This is stupid - but tommorow I'm leaving on a one week cruise WITH my boyfriend - and I haven't even started packing. I keep thinking about THAT - and then because this is my first trip ever - I've spent half the morning in the bathroom feeling sick because I'm scared to fly back - or what if they forget me, or I forget my luggage or or or...

I am soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo *everything* I don't know if it's anger or exhaustion or overreaction or what but I want it to stop now now now!

I haven't been able to eat.

I'm sorry this is so long. I needed to get it out though before I exploded.

Thanks Guys - what are your tricks for stress?
(Oh, and I know this doesn't have much to do with personality disorders - but I'd prefer to post here because it's a package deal, you have BPD - you have everything else....)

Kaitie
With a Headache the size of my cruise ship tommorow!