Out of 142 - I am ONE. - Personality Disorder Message Board

Kaitie · 11-19-2002, 03:52 PM

Hi. I'm super down. I have no idea how this happened -but I started my Architecture degree (first year) and there are 142 of us in the program and out of all those people it's me myself and I who talk to me.

I've noticed that everyone else had made these 'connections' that I haven't. Infact there are quite a few people here that I HATE (who I don't even know). People have even moved in with eachother as roomates and I generally eat and work alone.

The problem is I'm SSSSOOOOOOOO LONELY! The more people ignore me - the more I get depressed. Today in math class - I wanted to talk to some girls, just to chat - find out about their weekend and yeah - they didn't even acknowledge the fact that I was standing by them - so I just stormed off, kicked the heck out of a locker outside and then SI'd and yeah.

What evil vibe are they reading off me to know to keep their distance. I'm stuck up and a perfecktionist, and easily angered and easily frustrated but why the heck are 142 people avoiding me like the plague.

I love school but I hate everyone here. I'd like to do this all on my own and export every person I know.

Anyone else have this stupid problem about making friends - or finding people you'd actually LIKE to be friends with????

Kaitie

blue cloud · 11-20-2002, 07:53 AM

yes i know where you are coming from i am lucky i have left school and i no longer study as i just find it so hard to connect with people
i have friends from school who i still see and have a laugh with but i can only tolerate most of them if i am drunk!

i have one school friend who i actually can have a friendship with although he has a job is normal and i dont see him all that much

i went to college to study sociology and had no friends sat on my own studied on my own smoked on my own yet there were over 1000 students in the college how can that be?

what is wrong with me?

it isnt you or me that has the problem it is that other people are too frightened to get to know new people that they just dont bother

sorry i went off on one i just wanted you to know its not your fault

Cid Loki · 11-25-2002, 09:59 PM

Definitely, I don't really consider it a problem though, infact I don't really think about it either. If I see an opportunity to speak with someone, maybe that has even similar interests, music, sense of humor, that kind of thing, sometimes we might talk for a few minutes but never actually become friends. Just for communication, it feels good to know that, well just to talk with someone that you can relate to. I'm usually avoided as most people would say because somehow I choose to be, but it sticks. Finding people I'd actually enjoy being friends with is extremely hard, I know. I don't look anymore though, I just let things happen, and as blue cloud was saying alot of people just don't want to get to know anyone else for whatever reason it may be.

[This message has been edited by Cid Loki (edited 11-26-2002).]