donegal27

and only speaking for myself here, that despite my very best efforts with meds, therapy and determination, the vicious cycle of symptoms have accompanied me throughout 30 plus years anyway. In 1974 at the age of 31, I experience my first panic attack while driving. I had no idea what had happened at the time. But getting back in the car after that episode filled me with dread and with 3 young children, driving was a must. By 1976 I was truly housebound with agoraphobia and stayed indoors for 4 years...truly. Just reaching out the door to get my mail from the box was hard. No one ever knew much about agoraphobia then and everyone just said I had had a nervous breakdown. Even though I was indoors, I still had panic attacks and frightening symptoms we all know from the anxiety list.

Then 'it' started to lift by 1980, very slowly but it did through no effort of my own just somehow step by step I was able to get out. Even got a p/t job and eventually fulltime although driving bothered me still. I continued to have panic disorder symptoms though everywhere, just lived with it. The rest of the 80's were a life of 'what if's', running out of stores because of panic, out of restaurants and even at my family's home. So many places I couldn't go.By 1989 I stopped driving entirely. However by the early 1990's(now about 51 years old) I just accepted this 'univited guest' into my life and since that point remain pretty much quiet, mostly housebound and not particularly hopeful about ever being 'normal' again. During all those years of meds, ssri's, benzo's, behavioral and exposure therapy, here I am at 61 no different then before.

Who knows why some of us recover and manage to live well and others never do? I read so many of your posts and many who are young wondering what's going on and trying to come to terms with it all. I would say to not give up, try whatever is available and safe to use, new things come along all the time.
You all are worth it, each life is special....Donegal27