looking for other people with agoraphobia. - Phobias Message Board

Sweetpea_21 · 01-08-2007, 01:03 AM

Hi all, My name is sara ive been agoraphobic since 14 I am 21 now.I've tried everything except meeting and chatting with other agoraphobics I dont know anyone else like me and I feel very very alone.I think this might help alittle.

cassie2 · 01-08-2007, 02:53 AM

Hi sara
Agoraphobia has affected my entire life, I have been hospitilized, unable to leave the house and have generally led a life of panic! About 10 years ago ( I am now 48 ) I read a book by dr wayne dwyer, and read other books and tapes on living in this very minute, ie enjoying the right here right now, not worrying about what may happen and once I understood and practiced this new way of thinking I gradually improved, it took time and effort and more time, I now practice this all the time,to make an effort to think this way all the time and will do for the rest of my life.
We respond to the thoughts that we alone put in our brain, I had re-programmed myself to think only negatively, so I had to re-programme to think only positively. Every-time I had a bad thought, I would stop and say ..now why did I say that to myself, them make a conscience effort to say a positive thought instead, if I was starting to feel anxious ie panic coming on, I would stop and think about what i was doing at the time, whether it be sitting reading, or cleaning, or whatever, I would concentrate solely on the very moment I was in. We only can fear what could happen... we cant fear the very here, right now , and we cant fear the past, only what may happen, so once you start to think only in this very moment and re-inforce only positives into your brain, you will change, it takes time and set backs, and a battle of brains, negative thoughts will try to take over but you keep stopping them by consciously repeating out-loud if need be, I feel good, I can do that.The brain will go no you cant, no you cant , you need to say over & over, yes I can , I can,! do that until it becomes a natural way to think.
If you keep thinking the way you are thinking you will keep getting what you are getting.( which is anxiety) There is no other outcome.
The best way to get better, is to keep at anything always and forever, some people say oh I tried that , but it didnt work, it wont work unless you make it a life-style, and if you are agoraphobic, you now have no life , so what is a life-time of practicing positives, its a different way to live your life.and living is what you want to be doing, not wasting days because you are scared to go out and do things.
From this very moment you need to say ok, from now on I choose to be happy, I choose to be confident, I choose anything that I want to do...its a better way to think than I cant do that or this.Never give up and say things dont work for you, its your brain that is controlling what you do and it is you that is controlling what you choose to tell your brain...so change what you say to yourself and the brain will respond to your new positives thoughts.
It wont happen overnight, but it will happen ( thats an advert saying )
Should you wish to talk some more, I am more than happy to
best wishes
remember..we are what we think.

Sannah · 01-08-2007, 07:17 AM

Cassie, Bravo! Living in the here and now is the ONLY way to live! Keep spreading the message!

Jessbear · 01-09-2007, 04:29 AM

Hi!

I have also struggled with agoraphobia since I was a teenager (I'm 24 now). Going to school, shopping, going to concerts or going out to restaurants was always very difficult for me. Last spring, I made the decision to go see a psychiatrist to discuss my depression and anxiety. I was put on Lexapro to take daily and Lorazepam to take as needed for panic. The medications have helped me tremendously. I still have a bit of anxiety when I go out places, but it's nowhere near what it used to be.

You are definitely not alone in this. There are many of us out there who are willing to offer support.

-Jessica

coffeegirl2 · 01-26-2007, 03:53 PM

All of you have made some terrific suggestions and statements, and Cassie-hurray for you!

Like all of you, I too, have struggled with agoraphobia throughout the years (my twenties and early thirties) I am now 36 and will soon be 37

!

There were so many times I remember running out of supermarkets, malls, or stores in general, leaving carts full of items, or dressing rooms with clothes in them, and then running through the doors crying in shambles for no apparent reason. Or if I would be in line, the sweat, shaking, and anxiety would get to me. Feeling like I was going to vomit or that another human being might just 'talk' to me freaked me out. It was debelitating. There were times when I even got lost driving home from my house from Wal-Mart (I live 1 mile from WalMart) because I took a different route home-not the usual route) and that caused a huge anxiety attack.

Anyway, like Cassie, I have over came this problem. No longer do I walk in fear when going into malls, nor need to be chaperroned. It is how one views each day, and tackles that day, the moment, and moves on from the past of the days events. If it is a rough morning- can't change it. Got to get up and get past it. It is hard though ( I also have BP) and that makes things even more difficult.

Believing in oneself, and trusting in ones abilities and truth that one can have a life worth living with 'all that'- and what is obtainable, is well worth the fight! I did it for me, my DH, and my sons..You can to. Believe in who you are!!

Hugs

Coffeegirl