At 29 years old i would have never thought i would still have a social phobia! But i had a hard time in school! I never thought i was ugly! Just average. I have a european look! Dark hair fair skin full lips but in high school i was made fun of mostly for having full lips! They were not even as huge as pamela andersons or anything! But i was an outcast. I was shy in school and never bothered anyone but boys would constantly call me fungus boo! For my pale skin and would try to get me in trouble. Play tricks on me and girls were in a way worse. Arrogent! I was always nice and sweet and shy a door mat. In school i was thin cause i never ate all day. To nervous! It was almost like i did something to these people. Needless to say i developed mild agorphobia. Still today women will give me the occasional arrogent stare and whisper to someone. Sometimes men will act like their 12 and not want to rub shoulders with me? My question is why? Im average looking i have short dark hair green eyes fair skin petite. There are women heavy older look worse than me? Is this a curse? Whats odd an extremely good looking guy dark hair dark skinned is interested in me? Go figure. Beauty is only skin deep. As long as everyone is neat in appearance why do people obsess over the way they look so much. It makes the world a meserable place. Personally a persoanlity can make a person attractive. I do worry about looks i wont lie. Whats so funny is i dyed my hair blonde and got whistled at while eating out. I believe the world is programmed to believe certain things like blonde is beautiful. People need ot grow up! I am mildly depressed after people judging you all the time. Nick picking everything. I have thought about going to a therapist but i do not want to take pills. Any one else have the same problem as me? Christie
Hi Christie,
Well I certainly have the social phobia(called,social anxiety disorder where I am),it's kinda ruling my life just now.I too was very shy at school and was picked on because of it but apperances don't bother me.I'm not scruffy(honest!)but always wear black,partly coz I don't need to think about what colour to wear :-)
I can relate to a lot of what your saying,we're not the only ones.Try not to get so down about apperances, yours must be lovely or those guys wouldn't have been interested.Perhaps you're taking things a little too personnaly??
Maybe seeing a councellor would be a good idea,the best alternative to meds I think.My phobia led to depression which is how I am now.I'm not saying this will happen to you,we're different people,but I do think you should talk to someone professionaly.
I am sorry you feel that way. Like you, I also wonder how people perceive beautiful and vice versa. I believe it is in the eye of the beholder. I am in my 20's and consider myself a fair looking female. And yet, am single. I know a lot of women who are average looking but happily married. I am not asking for a mate, just curious how these happens. The odd part of it all is, I am usually attracted with married man. Urghh! Pain. I have several failed relationships and have not had been in one for years. I kind of miss it. But I'd rather be single than be with someone who is a mistake. All that I can tell you is that you are not alone and about man who would not lay eyes on you or even touch shoulders with you, the heck with them! I would not waste my time, my sight, my touch to those people. Just be the best that you can. Like you said, attitude plays a huge part in all this. Feel beautiful and you will look wonderful.
