Firstly apologies if I sound all "what about me" in this post, but I found out I had "PCOS" today (even though I should have perservered and got the diagnosis a long time ago
) and I'm just all over the place. I'm 28 years old and I was this close to crying on the phone to my mum (thankfully I held back)
Anyway... I've had no period for 4 years. I had weight loss to begin with, but then rapid weight gain. I now live at the gym, but where I used to love it, I now hate it. I have no energy and eat a ridiculously low-cal diet, pertified of anything that's remotely been near fat, let alone contains it. I have managed to get my weight down again - somewhere near normal, but it is SUCH a struggle, I just don't know how to keep it up. I'm scared to admit that to the doctor though, and they have me down as some kind of weight obsessed freak. I'm not obsessed - I just want to be a normal healthy weight, but I really really do have to live at the gym and eat the stupid way I do to achieve "normal" - otherwise it just piles on.
Anyway, I've been to the docs a few times due to lack of periods, but they always seem to pat my head (not literally, but you know what I mean) and say there-there go away for a few months and they'll come back... which is how I've got to four years without a single one.
The reason I've been going back again recently is for horrendous pains I'm getting down the right side of my abdomen. That's what made them send me for a UV scan which has shown both ovaries at PS, and a tiny cyst on the right side (2cm). Apparently it's tiny tiny so I don't need to bother with it, but they seem to forget it hurts like anything - I'm not sleeping because of it and have had mornings where I literally can't get out of bed.
The treatment they've given me is the pill ("marvelon") but I'm terrified of going on that because I'm battling with my weight so badly already and I think it's generally accepted you put pounds on with that.... so I decided that I'm not going to take it, but then read PCOS make you prone to weight gain... and whether or not I take it, I'm stuffed with thunderous pains down my right side because of the cyst. Should I just do nothing, take no extra medication except painkillers, and continue my current work-out... but then I don't know how I can do that...I'm just going to burn out.
I'm so so sorry to post such an angst fuelled angry post (I'm such a quiet thing in person), but I JUST don't know what to do. I haven't even been referred to a specialist - can I ask for that?? I've booked in another appointment tomorrow, but right now I just feel I'm going to go in and cry... I hate to waste their time, but what I am to do?
If anyone is out there who feels similar, any advice or someone just to say I'm not crazy... please anything will help.