I have PCOS and i'm covered in hair all over me & i have a beard since 20 years old, i'm 35 now. I'm mixed-race, half Indian/half English so this makes me more hairy (my indian genes). This doesn't bother me except for having boyfriends, i get so worried about it as i know men don't like hairy women.
I was wondering how all of you women with PCOS & unwanted hair growth & beards be in relationships and have boyfriends & husbands?
I currently shave all the hair off & i have to shave all over and it takes hours everyday. I don't wax it off because it has to be half a cm long before you can wax it off. It is so, so awful having to shave all the time. I get rashes & spots from hair removal so that makes it even harder.
I'm currently having laser treatment on my face, but that takes 8 months to do that (one treatment a month), and i don't know if it will work as i had 5 treatments on my face before but that didn't work and only made the hair worse. To do 3 or 4 areas with laser would take years & years & thousands of pounds and i need a solution to it now!
I have a boyfriend at the moment, but i haven't seen him for 5 weeks now since before xmas because i've been so worried about being hairy & having to remove all the hair. I've been really stressing about it with noone to talk to about it. I only have my boyfriend in my life right now & don't know noone else & don't see my family, i have been scared i can't see him anymore and i won't know anyone then or have anyone to talk to because i'm hairy and i really, really love him and i won't be able to see him anymore.
He keeps asking to see me everyday but i say no. I'm so worried about what to do. I wish they would invent something for women (& men) to easily get rid of hair growth - like a cream that would dissolve it down to the root that you just put on you once a month. I would do anything to be smooth and i keep thinking about all the other women out there who just do their legs & armpits, that must be so easy and i wish i was like that.
I don't know how i can live with a man because of this or go on holiday with a man. I've tried tablets from the doctors but they don't work on the hair.
I keep thinking my boyfriend would be better off with another woman because i'm hairy, and if it wasn't for that it would be ok and i would be so happy to be with him.
All there is is shaving, waxing and laser treatment and the epilator i find too painful. I can't find a solution to my hair growth problem all my life.
I've posted this as i've noone to talk to. Any advice or suggestions would be appreciated, how can you have a boyfriend/husband if you are hairy?
HI - Please don't be so hard on yourself. It isn't your fault you have PCOS. And I know EXACTLY what you are going through!! I have PCOS and have the same problems with hair, especially facial hair and it is VERY depressing, but you can't let it ruin your life or the relationship you have with your boyfriend. I am in my mid 40's and have been dealing with facial hair since high school. We live in a world full of judgmental people and all too many judge a person from the outside, without getting to know what's on the inside. There are men out there who look beyond the "outside". It sounds like you really love your boyfriend, so why not sit down and talk with him about PCOS and what you have to deal with? I am sure he will understand and will not love you any less because of it. I agree with you when you say it would be so nice to be like other women who only have to shave their legs and arm pits - what I wouldn't give for that!!! Be proud of who YOU are and not ashamed, you are a wonderful and beautiful person on the inside and the outside!!! You have to first believe that yourself. I am here to chat anytime! Now call that boyfriend and tell him to come over! :-)
my hair growth started at 13, i started shaving every all over. when i was 22 the doctors finally told me i had PCOS. at 23 my appendix swelled and i had to have it removed during that time of healing i didnt shave and i started waxing. (no money for laser and it helped i already knew how to wax). but i have to wait and let the hair grow out. i have had some horrible times like- my assistant manger said "if the men shave there face so do you" (the store manager put him in his place) i have had people stare, kids say "mommy she has a beard" other people have said "what circus are you from bearded lady" and a long string of things. it hurts im not going to lie but you have to do what is best for you and you know what i say "thats right fear the beard" and "dont worry im more women then you will ever be". i am married, i got married in october 2012. my husband and i have been together 5 years. after year one he caught me shaving my face one day and i was so frightened but he walked up to me put his hand on my cheek and said "hey beautiful". on my days off i started taking breaks from shaving so my skin could heal some. he wasnt bugged by it, not that i could tell anyways. and when i started waxing he understood ...i sat down with him and explained to him the PCOS as well as the damage i was doing by shaving. we talked about the cost of laser and waxing. i now wax once a month, 1 week of no hair, 1 week of 5 o clock shadow, 1 week of longer stubble, and one week of hair. something that really helped was letting him wax me one night and the next thing you know he was doing really good at it and started under standing it a little better. i do some times feel bad and think of him leaving me or almost wanting him to leave me for a "normal girl" but he reminds me that he loves me and only wants me. from the sounds of it you need to talk to your man. walk in with a "this is me" attitude and he will either love you or leave and you know what if he want to leave let him leave there are plenty of real men in the world and you dont need to deal with some little boy