Originally Posted by Healingbreeze
I think that I may be suffering from maybe several different things. ... I start getting panicked at night mostly. As long as I keep my mind occupied on something else, I'm pretty much ok. But once I lay down, all of those events start running through my mind.*~*Casey*~*
Hi Casey Hi Zimnah!
A couple of things that might pertain to your situation. These add up to a whole 'picture', so I'll just lay them out:
- Mainly, your system can have a 'level' of, let's say, edginess that creates a condition where relatively slight perturbations can sort of push you over the tolerance edge and you're into you-know-where-land: you know when you're there; you've been there before. I call it "this deja" feeling.
- You can get to this level a number of ways. T-->PT--PTS-->PTSD are kind of progressive but they start with T and that spells Trouble and Tornado, through your HOME, right there in your 'River City' is definitely
one way to get there. It can spike, then gradually trail off, etc. and it's additive.
I was talking to my sisty-other over the Memorial Day weekend and we were talking/crying about a friend of ours who got killed in Vietnam and who live in a housing subdivision behind our house. She said they were having a storm there that day and she could see over towards Tommy's house and did I remember how that tornado came from over there that time swerved RIGHT towards OUR house and we were scared s*tless? [My heart went from about from about 60-120 in half the time she was recounting that.] As she was saying it I was seeing it. She was behind me in our upstairs bedroom screaming at me...and my auto-immune audial sensitivity was at that time also going off with howling and screaming and
Well, I've this deja/angst right here again.
I still live with depressed auto-immune system levels which make going over the edge more likely than 'normal'. + stuff, as you say. A lot of STUFF in there adds up or tears down or whatever.
- The biochem stuff that gets evoked hangs around your body for awhile, like a latent bomb. Adrenalin is the main culprit (histamines mimic it). Its a hormone. We all have hormones. Thyroids and various glands generate hormones. blablabla --> SHARK ATTACK as Chevy Chase used to skit about.
- This 'hyper-sensitivity' in a sense doesn't care where it came it came from or who it victimizes. It's literally DREAD
ful to everyone it affects. It's called 'affective'-, and if it starts with PT, then as it progresses it can become PTS and then PTSD, but not until it becomes syndromic and then a disorder.
I think most of the other "xD's" have their own kind of special edge and various kinds of cycling or hanging arounds going on. One thing about the edge for me is a 'vertigo' deja; I'm not "afraid" of heights per se but I get the same feeling a la panic and GO BACK!
I think that crying and especially crying and hugging each other and even lauging while your doing it in some cases are wonderful expurgative communions with others who have had the same or similar experience. It's so wonderful when we finally are safe at "home". "
Home, Toto, Home. There's NO place like Home!"