Hi Everyone I Would Like Some Advice On How To Deal With Ptsd,
I Had A Very Painful Chidhood. I Was Not Abused Phyicly I Was Just Subject To Things That A Kid Should Not See.
My Parents Were Swingers There Were Strange People All The Time In And Out Of My House, I Had See My Mother In Ways I Should Have Never Witnessed.
I Am Now Grown With A Beautiful Family Whom I Love Dearly.
The Problem Is I Cant Stop The Visions And Thoughts In My Mind I Do See A Doctor And Am On Meds But Feel It Is No Help.
I agree your parents should have at least kept their affairs behind closed doors.
I often wish I could change my past as well. Among many other things my parents were also swings for a while but I never saw anything, but I hear enough stories to last a life time. Maybe that's why I find it revolting, but that's my opinion. I had to forgive their actions to begin to get past it, plus I also finally realized my father and mother have mental disorders. Im bipolar as well but Im relieved I got on medication before I became like them.
I know for myself the more depressed Im the harder it is to move forward. Maybe a different antidepressant would help or a natural antidepressant such as SAM-e. Possibly a self help book or just some soul searching to find a way to look past their behavior, still love the person yet appreciate you have different values therefore your children wont have to face situation. The first step to change is admittance, you'll
find a way to deal with your situation. K
It's great that your going to a doctor and on meds, but one more suggestion is to get some individual therapy or group therapy. Meds helped take away my nightmares and depression, but therapy helped me to "let go" of my childhood pain.
God bless you and don't give up, it gets better. I have been in recovery since 1/1/87 from my Depression, and I have a great relationship with my Mother now. She was my abuser--emotionally, verbally, and physically. Her illness caused her to hurt me, but I realize that she did the best that she could with what she had at the time.
hpflone, so you are sort of bringing it all back out and reliving it? It will get better, don't give up on therapy. I guess this is a reason why a lot of people won't start therapy because they just don't want to have to bring it all back up. It's a must, though, and once you start to feel better you will be glad that you did it. You must have a good therapist and you will get better fast if you just started and you feel this way already. I guess a lot of people either resist therapy or whatever, and they don't progress very well. Good luck. And AGK 1999. Hope you are doing better. I have heard that this is actually a form of sexual abuse even though you were not touched. You saw sexual things that you should not have and it included your parents. If you are still not feeling better maybe switch to another therapist. You mentioned that you see a doctor and are on meds. I wouldn't think that you would need meds for this unless there is some other diagnosis going on (but I'm not a doctor!). Psychiatrists are not the best for therapy and therapy is probably all that you need (my opinion!). (Psychiatrists are really sharp and they can size up a patient and know what is going on with them pretty accurately but I guess their job is just not to do a lot of the talk therapy. They are pretty free and loose with meds, though). Actually, you're probably not really getting much therapy, he's probably just reviewing your symptoms and checking your medication. I went to a clinic once and only a psychiatrist was available. He asked me if I wanted any meds and I said NO, I didn't need meds, I needed someone to talk to, and he didn't do a good job with it. I went to another clinic and talked to a psychologist. After several sessions it was the last therapy I ever needed. (Of course, many diagnoses need meds, I'm not anti-medication if someone needs it). Good luck.
Last edited by thegardener; 09-12-2006 at 11:12 AM.