I don't know what to do. - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Message Board

OtakuTess · 11-20-2005, 09:48 PM

Hello, everyone
I'm a 22 y/o female.

I am not even sure I should be posting here, because everything I have read or heard about developing PTSD does not apply to me, necissarily... but I feel I have the symptoms. I have been thinking for about 6 months now that I am merely depressed, but it never explained certain things, mainly my feelings of detatchment and emotional numbness... Also, it all developed after a certain incident which I have been trying to forget...
I took LSD about 6 months ago, and I had a terrible time, it was a bad trip. I didn't have hallucinations or anything like that, but I thought that I was going to lose my mind, and slip into nothing. When I told my friends they told me "Oh, well that happens with drugs like this. It's like you're going to die. But don't worry." So then I thought I was going to die, or at least lose my mind.
After the ordeal ended, no more than 2 or 3 days after, I started taking birth control pills which made me horribly depressed. I am off the pills now, but I feel like they may have exacerbated my bad trip, and worsened it...
That said, I now get antsy around any drugs what so ever, and I feel emotionally dead, I often feel hopeless or like I could just die or lose my mind any time. I also get bad nightmares (though they have lessened just abit recently).
I really don't know what to do about this, particularly since the cause of it is so obviously my fault.

I feel like I have ruined my whole life over one stupid little thing... Does it sound like i have PTSD? If so, is there anything I can do? I really want my life back, I feel like it is detroying my relationship with my BF.

barkingshark · 11-30-2005, 09:37 AM

It sounds like you're afraid you're harmed yourself and might be thinking about it too much. You may be having anxiety and depression and simply not able to recognise the symptoms because you might not be familiar with them. If you stop thinking about it for awhile and try to get out of the house a bit and do a few things it will help more than anything else. Basically, I think you just scared yourself and if that is the case it will linger a lifetime and you will always be slightly afraid of drugs which is not necessarily a bad thing.

LSD is not quite as bad as PCP, but experiencing either can be very emotionally upsetting. Cocaine is another bad drug to stay away from as it can create similiar experiences in large doses. Oddly enough, marijuana users seem to crave these odd experiences and imbide daily.

You'll be okay if you just give yourself time to get over the experience.

Deena_05 · 12-16-2005, 01:02 PM

I suffer from depression and anxiety (most of which is PTSD) I suffered the loss of 5 of my close friends in a year...it was horrible. It sounds like you may have depression and anxiety or one of the two. PTSD can be a lot like depression and anxiety, but I think you need to find out the symptoms you MUST have in order to have PTSD. Have you already? The only way you'll be able find out if it is PTSD or not is if you go to a psychiatrist or psychologist.