survivin

hello, its been awhile since i posted. but i figured someone might be interested in my story. i was diagnosed with severe PTSD in 2001 due to numerous people dying all around me. anyway. i was put on permanent disability lost my career and most everything i owned along with my life. and of course had my stay in the local mental lockup. life was hell, every day, every minute. day & night. after going through all the psychiatric meds more then once and being sent home by the DR.s to just survive. i was told i needed to undergo shock therapy in an attempt to erase my brain enough to have at least a marginal life. this was very difficult as i lived well, both financially and physically prior to the PTSD. i started my own research into naturopathic therapies. i went down the path of aromatherapy & vitamins, herbs and so on with some relief. i then made a huge commitment and went to san diego and underwent neurofeedback training. it is highly controversal. but i would have done anything for a few moments of "normal-dom". if you suffer from this disease. you know what i am talking about. after the first 30 minute session i felt unbelievable. i left the DR.s office and went to lunch with my wife and spent another couple hours on the beach until my next session. i had not been that normal in years. i continued to go through 3 1/2 weeks of intensive neurofeedback training along with herbal support and chiropractic adjustments 1-2 times per day. financially it cost me everything i had. but being that i was already homeless. i figured, might as well be homeless in san diego & take all the money i had in the world for one last throw of the dice in a shot at a seminormal life. since then i have dropped all of my other DR.s except my psychotherapist. i am still undergoing treatment through the san diego doctor. in comparison i feel so much different. at the end of the 3 1/2 weeks he provided me with an EEG readout of my before & after brainwaves and lab test readings(neurotransmitters levels). you wouldent believe the difference. i have learned that your brain really does change in a number of different ways when this disease decides to ambush you. right now. i have been buying and fixing up cars for resale. i am back in a house. and i am getting ready to start school full time again to get into another decent paying career. my psychotherapist still has his jaw on the ground. especially after i was told i had such severe ptsd that i would probably never be able to hold a real job again. i am taking "NO" prescription medications. only naturopathic herbs given by my san diego Dr. and the other day while talking to someone i had seen fairly frequently over the last 6 months. i mentioned the PTSD. he then said the magic words. " you have a mental disorder?? i would have never thought that." it was like music. i still struggle here and there with different things. but i dont think you can be the old person after PTSD. i think you will always be a little more sensitive. anyway. just thought i would share some good things that have happened. my insurance (medicare & VA) would'nt pay for any of the treatment because of the controversy and lack of approval from the medical community. but heck i guess if they got all the people suffering from this horrible disease to all of a sudden get even 25% better in 3 weeks. they would lose alot of money. sorry for the rambling on. anyway, theres is what ive been up to for the last year. LOL