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Old 01-30-2007, 09:55 PM   #1
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Child orgasm

I've looked up information on this subject and found no satisfying answer. Now that I have cyber friends, this is really embarassing, but here goes anyway.

I was 4 when I was raped by a group of boys. My only recollection of sensation is a dream in which I experienced excruciating vaginal pain followed by a bloody discharge.

When I was 5, I was molested by a couple of boys. It hurt like the dickens.

I also experienced my first orgasms at 5. The event was unrelated to abuse. I have read that children, even infants, can experience orgasm. But I've only read that this was by manipulation by another person. To my knowledge, this was never the case with me.

I've always figured this was just a normal childhood experience. I didn't know at the time what the pleasant sensation was called, but I remember it clearly, and much later I found out the name.

If anybody has read the information I've been looking for, I just wondered if that was normal? Can it be related to early sexual experiences?

Really embarassed, but curious,

Nikki

Last edited by hergy; 01-31-2007 at 12:14 AM.

 
Old 01-31-2007, 03:16 AM   #2
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Re: Child orgasm

Hi Nikki---- i couldn't find too much but basically have read that "child orgasms" can begin as early as 5 months of age. Usually a result of some sort of stimulation. as simple as a baby rubbing themselves on the floor or crib for comfort. Mother putting cream on their bottoms. it's the way the human body works. the child is not aware of any sexual connection to the feeling. In some children , mainly girls it continues through early childhood. 7,8,9 years old. There appears to be no connection between sexual abuse and child orgasms. they speak somewhat of sexual abuse but do not link the two as the orgasm also happens in children that have never been abused. Help any??

ICC

 
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Old 01-31-2007, 04:41 AM   #3
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Re: Child orgasm

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Originally Posted by ICC View Post
Help any?
Yes. I thought as much from my research, but I've always been too embarassed to ask. I also felt like I should know that. I just never discuss matters of a sexual nature. I read a lot, but not everything is easy to find. The controversial Kinsey reports threw the question in my head.

You mentioned that you looked it up. Thanks! You so often go above and beyond. You're such a caring person.

The 'stimulating' experience is kind of funny to me now, but, I figured, it can't hurt to ask.

Not everything in my childhood was wierd and unpleasant.

BIG NOTE: I don't even see your face, but seeing your post as the first one here made me VERY embarassed. Thanks for responding.

Love,

Nikki

 
Old 01-31-2007, 04:50 AM   #4
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Re: Child orgasm

Nikki----WHY???

ICC

 
Old 01-31-2007, 06:02 AM   #5
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Re: Child orgasm

Quote:
Originally Posted by red_five View Post
I've looked up information on this subject and found no satisfying answer. Now that I have cyber friends, this is really embarassing, but here goes anyway.

I was 4 when I was raped by a group of boys. My only recollection of sensation is a dream in which I experienced excruciating vaginal pain followed by a bloody discharge.

When I was 5, I was molested by a couple of boys. It hurt like the dickens.

I also experienced my first orgasms at 5. The event was unrelated to abuse. I have read that children, even infants, can experience orgasm. But I've only read that this was by manipulation by another person. To my knowledge, this was never the case with me.

I've always figured this was just a normal childhood experience. I didn't know at the time what the pleasant sensation was called, but I remember it clearly, and much later I found out the name.

If anybody has read the information I've been looking for, I just wondered if that was normal? Can it be related to early sexual experiences?

Really embarassed, but curious,

Nikki
Dear Nikki,

As you have already read the Kinsey research from the 1950's, you know that girls at an early age are more "sexually curious" than boys. I need not go into details.

Then there is a report from Life Planning Education, Washington DC Advocates of Youth that states most "sex play" as they put it, is done out of curiosity.

Then there is Freud with "Infant Pleasure Potentials."

As ICC(ICY) has stated, another child is not necessary to experience the orgasm.

If I had to look at it from a deeper level (when don't I) I would say that your childhood trauma brought more attention and thus curiosty to the vaginal area, thus the need to "explore" arose.

Remember that children process information differently at various stages in their life.

Take care
God Bless
FTM

Last edited by Phoenix; 01-31-2007 at 06:05 AM.

 
Old 01-31-2007, 06:53 AM   #6
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Re: Child orgasm

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Originally Posted by ICC View Post
Nikki----WHY?
It's not you. You're so awesome. You didn't make fun of me or judge me, but answered my question allowing me dignity.

I am EXTREMELY private, especially with regard to sexual subjects. So much shame is connected with such issues that I'm incredibly embarassed when addressing them. This matter, in particular, because I feel like my question was elementary. But I wanted to know, so I went for it.

After reading information with which I was previously unfamiliar, I wondered. I felt positive that someone would be able to shed some light.

If I could see you guys, I'd never approach most of the issues I do on this board. I'm super thankful for your candor.

 
Old 01-31-2007, 07:12 AM   #7
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Re: Child orgasm

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Originally Posted by forthemasses View Post
As ICC(ICY) has stated, another child is not necessary to experience the orgasm.
Actually, I'd never discuss the experience with someone else, but the incident involved me and the 'magical powers' of a schoolyard swingset pole.

I spent a lengthy intimate moment with that pole. I was the last kid in line to go back to class. My teacher had to yell my name to get me join the other kids.

Like ICC mentioned, I didn't connect that experience with anything sexual. In fact, I really did think the swingset was responsible.

After recess, I guess I just went about my business because I have no recollection of 'exploring' as a kid.

The incident has never disturbed me. In fact, my best friend and I laughed about it when I told her. But after recently reading some Freud and Kinsey, I was curious.

Thanks so much for the reply.

Bashfully,

Nikki

 
Old 01-31-2007, 07:24 AM   #8
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Re: Child orgasm

hi Nikki---i was just wondering why me beign the first to respond embarrassed you I have to tell you that I gave birth to three daughters and have a grandaughter so what you were asking i looked up but really didn't need to. don't forget I was a little girl once also. Kids have all different ways and interests that they explore. kids are kids. and they should all have adults who teach with a kind, gentle but firm touch and never, never do things to make them grow up like we all did. Nothing to be embarrassed about, my daughter asked me a similar question about her daughter who is 4 now but about a year ago she had no idea what this child was doing


Love you,
ICY (Grasshopper)

 
Old 01-31-2007, 07:50 AM   #9
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Re: Child orgasm

Nikki, I was very sexual from the age 5 or so, I sexualized my sexual trauma and would stimulate myself constantly. This forum a good and safe place to get all this stuff out into the open and work them out.

“If I had to look at it from a deeper level (when don't I) I would say that your childhood trauma brought more attention and thus curiosity to the vaginal area, thus the need to "explore" arose.”~ FTM……OMG!…. Yes, “exploration” turned to obsession for me.

Nikki ~ I want to say you are awesome (((cyber-buddy))) , to have the courage and go past the embarrassment and search for meaning encourages me to do more of the same.

“I'm sorry for going on. It's largely due to my excitement that someone understands. But, at the same time, I hurt for you. It's a painful issue. I don't discuss it outside the anonymity I enjoy on this board.” ~ Nikki………I have had panic attacks over discussing these private matters even with my therapist. But after a wile I have become more confident about talking about such matters with my trauma group at the mental health center and on-line…. . I think it helps to dissipate the shame when this stuff is no longer a secret… Zencat.

 
Old 01-31-2007, 07:59 AM   #10
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Re: Child orgasm

Quote:
Originally Posted by ICC View Post
hi Nikki---i was just wondering why me beign the first to respond embarrassed you...my daughter asked me a similar question about her daughter who is 4 now but about a year ago she had no idea what this child was doing
Well, it's like this:

I've never been able or encouraged to talk to my mom about sexual matters. Thus, more shame than I already had.

You've become like a mom, so seeing my cyber mom be the first on the scene instantly brought embarassment and shame.

I've always wished I could talk to my mom like your daughter talked to you.

I love you, ICC!

Nikki

 
Old 01-31-2007, 08:08 AM   #11
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Re: Child orgasm

Quote:
Originally Posted by zencat View Post
Nikki ~ I want to say you are awesome (((cyber-buddy))) , to have the courage and go past the embarrassment and search for meaning encourages me to do more of the same....I have had panic attacks over discussing these private matters even with my therapist....I think it helps to dissipate the shame when this stuff is no longer a secret.
Thanks, Zencat! That fills me up!

And know, just as my opening up helps you, your opening up helps me.

It often seems impossible for me to get things out in the open with my therapist. She's great and I know she's heard it all before. I just wish I didn't have to open my mouth.

You're definitely right: The shame starts to fade when the secrets aren't secret anymore.

Big hugs and love,

Nikki

 
Old 01-31-2007, 08:10 AM   #12
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Re: Child orgasm

I love you too Nikki I always wished my mother would ahve talked to me also but she was also criticizing and belittling. All she ever told me and my sister about sex was at about 13 "stay away from the boys" What in God's holy name did that mean to a child who knew nothing and doesn't a statement like that for a curious child make them go "near the boys" just because they were told not to? I can't say I gave my girls a great sex education because of course I wasn't taught how but at their ages now we are Mother/daughter and friends. 28 and 34. my middle daughter would be turning 31 this March. So you see I would have liked to be MOM forever but these women had different ideas and grew up.

Love you hon,
Grasshopper

 
Old 01-31-2007, 08:11 AM   #13
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Re: Child orgasm

Quote:
Originally Posted by red_five View Post
When I was 5, I was molested by a couple of boys. It hurt like the dickens.
Hi Nikki, I have been following along here for awhile, it doesn't seem like you have mentioned this incident when you were five before?

 
Old 01-31-2007, 08:23 AM   #14
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Re: Child orgasm

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Originally Posted by Zally View Post
Hi Nikki, I have been following along here for awhile, it doesn't seem like you have mentioned this incident when you were five before?
I haven't really. I remember going on a trip to my grandparents' house with my family soon after the incident. I was sitting in the back seat staring out the window. I was consumed with deep shame, guilt, regret and fear. I still feel that and I also feel responsible. So I don't usually discuss it.

In brief, I let a couple of boys put their hands in my underwear at school. That's as much as I'm comfortable with right now. Of course, lots of shame followed that unwelcome experience. One of the boys was a bit rough, so I also remember pain.

By the way, nice to meet you, Zally!

Nikki

 
Old 01-31-2007, 08:36 AM   #15
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Re: Child orgasm

Redfive, I am sorry that you are left feeling so many uncomfortable emotions after that incident. I hope in time that you are able to put it into its proper perspective. I can just see that little girl sitting in that car being so distressed. It just isn't right that she had to suffer so.

Last edited by Zally; 01-31-2007 at 08:38 AM.

 
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