Fell out of my chair, but I love this table - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Message Board

hergy · 02-01-2007, 10:01 PM

Hi, guys. I like the table. I look forward to joining our special group for an interchange of the good, bad and ugly.

I've fallen out of my chair, but I'm not leaving. I'm just collecting myself here on the cyber floor.

There was the Sunday thing.

But, today, I had an appointment with my oncologist. I have a long range of emotions that never properly surface when I head for a cancer center.

Then, when I'm examined, I can't avoid someone seeing that horrid surgical scar and misshapen breast. I told the doctor that the appearance bothers me. He asked if I ever considered plastic surgery. I'm very 'natural' in my approach to things, so I don't like to entertain such options for myself. Plus, I couldn't afford it if I wanted it.

I placed a bowl of M&Ms on the table before my accident. I know there are those who should NOT have lots of sugar, so use discretion guys. And save some for me. A chocolate stupor helps tremendously.

Love,

Nikki

stick2013 · 02-02-2007, 03:38 AM

Dearest Nikki,

There are organizations out there that can help with reconstruction if you should choose to go that route. I wonder if you really are "natural or if you keep the scar for other reasons???? Something tot hink about.

I want to know if the M&M's are peanut, or plain???? Could you bring both kinds....I REALLY love them.....

I REALLY love you too...

Hugs,

Sid

ICC · 02-02-2007, 04:47 AM

Nikki----I agee with Sid. give some thought to this. The diabetic has tasted the pie dustoff brought and you best look at that bowl of M &M's. it's almost empty.

HAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! Nikki on the note of your scar. think about it. it's a part of you. maybe you hate it but it is still a part of you and the things you have been through in life. keeping it could make you stronger and removing it could help you to go on. the jury is out on this one for me. My daughter had a gorgeous $500 wig that she wore on occassion just because she wanted her hair longer. When it wasn't needed she donated it to out closest cancer center. There are alot of avenues out there to help you make your decision. sleep on it a couple of days and maybe we can help the jury to make a decision.

Love you,
Grasshopper

hergy · 02-02-2007, 03:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stick2013

There are organizations out there that can help with reconstruction if you should choose to go that route. I wonder if you really are "natural or if you keep the scar for other reasons???? Something tot hink about.

I will keep that in mind about the organizations.

The surgeon removed a margin of tissue from around the site of the tumor to make sure no cancer cells were left. The 3-inch scar, of course, is right on top of that area, so the scar just makes it worse.

The oncologist told me that the pain I still have in that breast is because I'm still healing. It takes a long time for nerves to reconnect and heal after surgeries and radiation. But I'll always be missing that tissue.

If I had the fullness back, I wouldn't mind the scar so much. As ICC said, the scar would be a strengthening reminder that I survived.

I brought plain M&Ms, but according to ICC, they're almost gone. I'll have to get more, a brown bag and a yellow one.

By the way, I'm sitting in my chair again. Today was a productive one.

I love you!

Nikki

hergy · 02-02-2007, 03:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ICC

There are alot of avenues out there to help you make your decision. sleep on it a couple of days and maybe we can help the jury to make a decision.

I hadn't given serious thought to reconstruction until the oncologist mentioned it this week. I've always been afraid that it would just make the scarring worse and I'm unsure of the long-term safety in using whatever substance they'd use to replace the lost tissue.

I need to look up some information because the option had never before been presented to me. Feeling worthless already, I didn't think it would be worth the effort. I hope to share these little boobs with someone one day. I'd like them both to be pleasant handfuls.

More M&Ms are on the way!

Love and hugs,

Nikki