flashback? - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Message Board

finegane · 02-12-2007, 07:39 PM

I havent been on for a while, I didnt know if reading other peoples stories were making me sad, or if it just a case of the blues. Anyways, I had an experience on saturday that i need someone to talk to about.

Saturday night a bunch of my friends and I threw a surprise birthday party for one of the girls. i had a great time, playing cards, drinking (socially) and having a lot of fun. Then all of a sudden, I freaked out. I started crying absolutely hysterically, I cant remember the last time i cried this hard. i kept saying over and over, "dont let them take me back, please i cant go back" (refering to the hospitalization i had roughly a year ago) i couldnt be consoled i was lying on the floor, my head on my best friends lap just absolutely petrified that i was going to be taken back because i had had too much to drink. she has always been the one to be able to calm me down but this time i just couldnt. i could hear what i was saying but it felt like a bad dream. then as quickly as it came, it was over. i was still a bit tipsy but i wasnt freaking out like i was before.

I need help...is this normal? did the alcohol cause it? am i going back into my depression?

hergy · 02-13-2007, 12:44 AM

The root of your problem is real and should be addressed. Depression is serious and a professional counselor, a psychiatrist or therapist, is an ideal guide for finding out how to properly treat the problem.

However, alcohol is a depressant. If you're already down, any amount won't help matters, but will pull you lower. Plus, it's hard to hold back when alcohol has relaxed you enough to freely express yourself, sometimes without discretion.

Address the issues that are bringing you down with a professional who can help. Steer clear of the alcohol. You may notice that it's not affecting others like it's affecting you, but everyone is different and not everyone is depressed. Don't compare yourself with others. Participating in every activity your friends do doesn't erase the issues that already exist.

Take care of yourself. You deserve to feel better.

Nikki

ICC · 02-13-2007, 05:51 AM

finegane --- I am right beside Nikki on this one. In my opinion starting with reading others posts making you sade/blue is perfectly normal. I think we have all been there. I know I have. Had to take a break because others hurts were bringing mine to the surface. OK so you were already down and issues were coming to light. the effect alcohol has on this is to lower your inhibitions, bring your emotions to the surface and it is much harder to control while under the influence. I am not taking this in any negative way but as a way for you to understand that your issues are right there. counseling is your best bet and coming here frequently and unloading so that you are dealing on a concious level and not overwlemed with being under the influence. I know this because I have done it. I am not much of a drinker and never have been. On occassion i have a couple and having no constituion am bombed pretty quickly. Did it recently. Did it a few times after my daughter passed and it seemed to be the only way I COULD cry. and boy would I cry. uncontrollably for hours. Be careful, seek some good therapy and come here. we are here for you in whatever we can help with.

Love and Hugs,
Grasshopper

stick2013 · 02-13-2007, 03:23 PM

Finegane,

My advice to you is to first stop drinking....With PTSD we have a higher risk of becoming heavy drinkers to self medicate. So what starts out as social, can become a problem. Second, I think that you need to face your fears..... You have a fear of the Physc ward, so if there is any way that your therapist can take you to one to face your fear, I think that you can over come this......In order to overcome any anxiety..................YOU HAVE TO FACE YOUR FEAR, and WALK THROUGH IT!!!!!!!

Hugs,

Sid

finegane · 02-13-2007, 03:50 PM

Thanks all for the support and advice.

First off, I want to clear my name a bit, I don't drink frequently, not even once a month. Also, when I do drink, it's not to get drunk. I only have a few drinks which for me, has an effect.

After saying that, I know I shouldn't drink. There are many reasons, but some of them include an alcoholic dad and grandfather, being on meds for depression, being depressed in general...and so on.

I don't plan on drinking anytime soon, but I can almost guareente that I will on April 11, it is my 21st birthday!

I do appreciate the advice, and I understand where everyone is coming from.