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Old 02-17-2007, 05:42 PM   #1
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partner with ptsd

I am new to the boards and I myself have pain management from fractured
back issues but I live with a partner with ptsd. Recently his episodes are getting worse and the doctor put him on valium for sleep which I do not think is helping. I am getting very worried about his outbursts and lack of interest
in life in general which is affecting our relationship greatly. Any suggestions
about medications which work for ptsd or experiences on living with someone
with ptsd would be greatly appreciated.

 
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Old 02-17-2007, 07:12 PM   #2
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Re: partner with ptsd

Well, the only person I've lived with who had PTSD is myself. I do know that for me, getting hold of the depression was the hardest part, and I still struggle with it. I suppose that's why it's a disorder, and not a disease; there are all kinds of neuroses that are associated with it.

As for the sleep issue, I don't know what to tell you. My insomnia used to be so profound that I could go months without sleeping more than two or three hours. Now I have it intermittently, and if it lasts more than four days or so I ask my doctor for a prescription sleep aid, just to get me back on track.

The best thing that I did to solve the sleep problem was a confrontation. I confronted all of my demons and played a St. Michael on them--- I attempted to face them one on one and slay them. It was mostly successful; I cannot face my tormentors the way some others can, mine is combat-related. But I did write down the dreams and memories that were so life-intruding (as soon as I dreamed or thought of them), and in the daylight and when I was ready, I faced them. Face them. I am never ready to face them all together, en masse.

If you can get him on here to talk to the rest of us, it might help. I know it's helped me. Failing that, keep coming yourself and let us help you. There are a bunch of kind and generous, helpful souls here.

Just wait till you hear from Grasshopper and Sid!

Dustoff

 
Old 02-18-2007, 01:01 AM   #3
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Re: partner with ptsd

Quote:
Originally Posted by 7YEARS View Post
I am new to the boards and I myself have pain management from fractured
back issues but I live with a partner with ptsd. Recently his episodes are getting worse and the doctor put him on valium for sleep which I do not think is helping. I am getting very worried about his outbursts and lack of interest
in life in general which is affecting our relationship greatly. Any suggestions
about medications which work for ptsd or experiences on living with someone
with ptsd would be greatly appreciated.
Dear 7,

PTSD and relationships don't tend to work too well without a strong support group (therapists, family,organizations) and if the absence of all of these is present, it can provide for a "steep uphill climd" to say the least.

With PTSD, a person must first deal with themselves before others because the problem lies within.

With respect to meds, Cymbalta may help. There is also Trazadone or Ambien for sleep

Dustoff has a point with attempting to get your husband on this board.

If he is resistant, try not to push too hard; maybe he will see by your example.

At the very least, you can ask him to read a few of the threads, for starters.

We're here if and when you need us.

Take care
God Bless
FTM

Last edited by Phoenix; 02-18-2007 at 01:02 AM.

 
Old 02-18-2007, 11:03 AM   #4
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Re: partner with ptsd

Hi 7,

Well my take on this is completely different......If your partner is unwilling to get the help that he needs, then it is NOT your problem. Enabling him will only make matter worse. The sleep issues, and his PTSD are HIS issues, NOT yours....

When he has an OUTBURST.......Then you need to tell him that this behavior is UNACCEPTABLE, and will NOT be tolerated. End of story! Do NOT engage in a discussion with him. The behavior is NOT acceptable. His outburst are childish, and he NEEDS to address them in an ADULT MANNER.......

I think that if he chooses NOT to get help, then you have a choice to make. You can either live the way that you have been, you can leave, or YOU can get therapy for YOU to LEARN how to PROTECT yourself, and your emotions.......And NOT enable him........

Please don't think that I am being harsh......But it is HIM that has the problem NOT you.........


Sid

 
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