I started the thread on Entertainment and PTSD. Addicted to disturbing images and ideas, I have ALWAYS leaned toward 'material not suited for anybody.'
It has been a disturbing, depressing month. Numb this week, today I experienced my first hint of an awakening of some emotion.
This afternoon, I popped in one of my 'made for only me' movies... and I was disturbed, disgusted and will probably never watch it again. I had a
'whoa!' in my head.
This is a sudden turn for me. One day I'm swimming in torture, death and abuse, the next I'm sick of my own selection.
I'm not sure what brought this on. Am I just being moody? It wasn't a plan. But I hope it's a permanent thing. Cleaning up what I see may help me clean up what I think.
Well, that was my little announcement.
Nikki
it's not moodiness it's recovery. I am so happy for you. Once it all comes out you start to clear your head and wonder just what the h--- you've been doing and thinking. That's why i told you to just let it all happen as it has to. Your blue funk for the past week was just a transition from being unwell to becoming well. I am overwelmed feeling like a proud parent. And you will start feeling stronger day by day in your thoughts and actions. Sometimes you amaze yourself with the changes. God bless and keep you safe. You are an inspiration.
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