Trauma Buffet - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Message Board

hergy · 02-23-2007, 04:03 PM

I finally touched the tip of Hurricane Floyd's role in my life today in therapy. I've mentioned it to my therapist before, but I explained a bit more today. According to her, I exhibit symptoms of PTSD in connection with the event. Great!

Early in 1999, I began having flashbacks about the rapes. A few months later came hurricanes Dennis and Floyd which brought some big floods. I lost my home. Then I started having more flashbacks about the rapes. By the end of 1999, I was losing hair, having stress incontinence and was out of my head. I haven't been the same since then.

My therapist explained to me that one trauma can trigger more memories about another trauma.

I lost all my belongings, photos, keepsakes, everything, in the flood. Some guys took me in a boat to my house to get my cat. When I saw my house mostly under water, I knew she wouldn't be ok. I remember opening my back door (my washing machine floating just inside) and hearing her cries. She was alive! She later died after a sickness she caught after the flood. I never got over her. A lot of people, including myself, got very sick. Lots of ugly organisms were contaminating everything after the water went down.

My head was on another planet during that whole experience. The rapes were first in line, so the flood has been on the back burner. I still get 'flood nightmares' pretty often, though. Sometimes, in my nightmares, some other trauma is happening underwater. Weird, huh?

I thought I'd hold out in therapy and deal with the traumas one by one, maybe in chronological order. Seems things are just popping out however they please.

Nikki

stick2013 · 02-23-2007, 04:15 PM

Nikki,

Trauma, after, trauma, nightmare after nightmare, flashback after flashback...Yup it's the nature of the "Beast." Nothing is "IN ORDER", somethings don't ever make sense, and sometimes you can't relate to ANY of it.

Sorry about your cat.....I had 2 one time that I LOVED... They were actually very smart cats... I was about to house sit for someone for the entire winter, and just before I moved in, she informed me that I could NOT have my cats. I had already given up my apartment(as I would be living at her house for 5 months) I had no choice but to give them up. I sat on the floor of the Humane Society crying like a baby. They were adopted in 2 weeks TOGETHER.... They were brothers from a litter and at 2 yrs old they had always been together... I was at least relieved for that small gift.

It's good that things are POPPING OUT...I know it's hard to deal with this stuff, but we have too.......Holding things in, just makes them "FESTER" beneath the surface.....

You are well on your way, and I know that you are working hard at getting better.... So proud of you......

Love you....

Sid

Phoenix · 02-23-2007, 08:15 PM

Dear Nikki,

You wrote:

"Sometimes, in my nightmares, some other trauma is happening underwater. Weird, huh?"

This could mean that some issue is not ready to surface yet.(just an opinion)

Take care
God Bless
FTM

hergy · 02-23-2007, 09:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stick2013

It's good that things are POPPING OUT...I know it's hard to deal with this stuff, but we have too.......Holding things in, just makes them "FESTER" beneath the surface.....

What you say is true. At the end of 2005, I was a violently shaken can of Dr. Pepper. The can was opened and it was chaotic me everywhere.

I'm learning how to release stuff as I go. Still, I've got to get rid of what's still there, quite a bit of trauma lost in carbonated foam.

I'm sorry about your cats, too. It's a pain I know well.

I love you!

Nikki

hergy · 02-23-2007, 09:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by forthemasses

This could mean that some issue is not ready to surface yet.

Well, there's always some sort of drama going on in the water during those stupid flood nightmares.

Every flood nightmare involves, of course, water filling an enormous space, usually threatening the lives of others. I'm usually underwater or going underwater, frantically trying to alert someone or save somebody. My immediate family is almost always around while I'm underwater or going under. They never join me. I've often surfaced to get help from one of them, mostly my father, but they never pay attention to me.