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Old 09-02-2007, 08:40 AM   #1
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Reserving the Right to Vent

It's me again.

I finally found out the origins of why lying is such an issue to me.

My brother passed away in 1990 and I was witness to him being stabbed.......

That's not the reason though.

The day before this murd**** has his day in court, the local newspaper states that this person is going to plea bargain his way to a lesser sentence.......

Not the reason either.

I was present when this murd**** told the judge "we got into a fight and were wrestling and the knife accidently cut him."

This was a bold faced lie and my father told me not to say anything(which I still regret).

The dam* murd**** lied and I still can't get this bad taste out of my mouth.

So when I am injured by a MVA (the victim) and others are lying just for the sake of:

1) Keeping their job (driver)

2) Cash incentive (store-front "witness")

3) Paying out less (insurance company)

I get peaved to no end.

Now i'm not expecting anyone to understand exactly nor do I want to be felt pity for.

I am venting because I have PTSD and it seems to take so much more effort proving innocence(when indeed you did nothing wrong) than just outright lying(when others are sticking to their story).

I'm tired, angry, upset, peaved and then some.

I cannot leave this alone; the constant pain alone won't let me.

I've touched on this before and thought I had a better grip on this situation...

Apparently not.

(no replies are necessary)

Ryan

 
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Old 09-02-2007, 09:28 AM   #2
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Re: Reserving the Right to Vent

Hi Ryan.
I know you said that replies weren't necessary but i had to write.
I cant believe that...its horrible. Did he go to jail?

You have the right to vent though, get it all out...it may hurt but it does need to surface if you want to.

Cas

 
Old 09-02-2007, 09:50 AM   #3
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Re: Reserving the Right to Vent

Dear Ryan,
I am so glad you wrote this. You know I understand about the lying. It does so much damage to others and creates so much anxiety for someone with PTSD. You are clear in your thoughts and words and I agree with you 100% on why you cannot put it down. Both situations are aggravating your PTSD in more ways than one. The injustices in today's world make those with such sensitivity go round and round in circles. I'm sorry I have no words of wisdom for you. I don't because I know how this affects a human being who is honest. You're in a legal system that there isn't anything that is so frustrating. You tell the truth and then you have someone lie and another swear by their lies. What does a person do? I have not found that answer yet.

Grasshopper

 
Old 09-02-2007, 10:35 AM   #4
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Re: Reserving the Right to Vent

I can relate whole heartedly with the lying issue. Some people can do it as simply as they put one foot infront of the other and walk. Blatant lies make my skin crawl. Maybe that is why we are ptds sufferers?......... We are SO conscientious! It is only in the last couple of years I have figured out how much people do lie, to save their own skin.(I still wouldn't be able to lie then)! Why didn't you speak up that day? ?fear of being ridiculed, ?not believed. I seperated from x in '92. Only now am I speaking of what went on from 80 - '92, and I'm still not being believed, so the whole thing swims around in my head! Sorry, off on a tangent there. Lies and trust issues seem to be the biggest problem of many of us, make 100 times worse because the people who lied/went against us are family.

 
Old 09-02-2007, 12:38 PM   #5
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Re: Reserving the Right to Vent

Quote:
Originally Posted by casatonia 1 View Post
Hi Ryan.
I know you said that replies weren't necessary but i had to write.
I cant believe that...its horrible. Did he go to jail?

You have the right to vent though, get it all out...it may hurt but it does need to surface if you want to.

Cas
Dear Cas,

He was treated as a minor and sentenced to juvenile detention.

Ryan

 
Old 09-02-2007, 12:54 PM   #6
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Re: Reserving the Right to Vent

Quote:
Originally Posted by isitme View Post
I can relate whole heartedly with the lying issue. Some people can do it as simply as they put one foot infront of the other and walk. Blatant lies make my skin crawl. Maybe that is why we are ptds sufferers?......... We are SO conscientious! It is only in the last couple of years I have figured out how much people do lie, to save their own skin.(I still wouldn't be able to lie then)! Why didn't you speak up that day? ?fear of being ridiculed, ?not believed. I seperated from x in '92. Only now am I speaking of what went on from 80 - '92, and I'm still not being believed, so the whole thing swims around in my head! Sorry, off on a tangent there. Lies and trust issues seem to be the biggest problem of many of us, make 100 times worse because the people who lied/went against us are family.
Dear isitme,

I hear you.

I didn't speak up because my father was so domineering that back then we listened to ANYTHING he had to say.

He is not going to "shut me up" this time; that's for sure.

You know that some people say "if you tell the truth, you have nothing to worry about."

This does not always ring true.

Ryan

 
Old 09-02-2007, 01:01 PM   #7
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Re: Reserving the Right to Vent

Quote:
Originally Posted by ICC View Post
Dear Ryan,
I am so glad you wrote this. You know I understand about the lying. It does so much damage to others and creates so much anxiety for someone with PTSD. You are clear in your thoughts and words and I agree with you 100% on why you cannot put it down. Both situations are aggravating your PTSD in more ways than one. The injustices in today's world make those with such sensitivity go round and round in circles. I'm sorry I have no words of wisdom for you. I don't because I know how this affects a human being who is honest. You're in a legal system that there isn't anything that is so frustrating. You tell the truth and then you have someone lie and another swear by their lies. What does a person do? I have not found that answer yet.

Grasshopper
Dear Grasshopper,

I was really left with no choice; I had to get that out.

If I take a look at myself and own up to my shortcomings, I know that it has to amount to something.

Take care.

Ryan

 
Old 09-02-2007, 01:37 PM   #8
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Re: Reserving the Right to Vent

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phoenix1 View Post
Dear isitme,

I hear you.

I didn't speak up because my father was so domineering that back then we listened to ANYTHING he had to say.

He is not going to "shut me up" this time; that's for sure.

You know that some people say "if you tell the truth, you have nothing to worry about."

This does not always ring true.

Ryan
I fully empathize there too. You sound so much stronger to fight for your rights. I hope you don't let up.............

 
Old 09-02-2007, 02:45 PM   #9
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Re: Reserving the Right to Vent

Quote:
Originally Posted by isitme View Post
I fully empathize there too. You sound so much stronger to fight for your rights. I hope you don't let up.............
Dear isitme,

I came this far; I can't let up now (even though options are few and far between----at times).

Ryan

 
Old 09-02-2007, 07:11 PM   #10
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Re: Reserving the Right to Vent

Ryan,
Some people will do just about anything to save themselves. I have to believe there is a special place in hell for liars. Especially when a lie catastrophically alters the course of our life.
I'm glad you expressed how you feel. I know you are most definitely not alone in feeling this way. I feel the same - one lie will forever alter the way I view someone. Maybe that's unforgiving, but I think it's classic self-preservation.

Beka

 
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