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Old 10-01-2007, 05:50 AM   #1
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Unhappy PTSD is not a friend

I find this is the most confusing thing to have the doctors say it's normal, i just don't feel normal and living with the what ifs just just not good enough. for me living with this is like living, its just so confusing and i would if i will ever feel hole again in instead of feel like it was never ended living in fear. I find it hard to talk with ppl as even if they rays there voices it make me think are they going to hurt me in someway or another. loud noices even make me jump and it there is some on TV that is gross it makes me feel ill and as if it's happening to me, feel real to me though it is on TV. I also wonder if i will ever get over this and feel like a normal person with a normal borring life free of trauma and dramas and pain.
That for me is what i wish for, but i know i will never be the same and the pain will never get better as because of this and the assault has change me and every thing for ever and a day.

Last edited by fisbie; 10-03-2007 at 06:32 AM.

 
Old 10-02-2007, 05:53 AM   #2
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Re: PTSD is not a friend

I know the feeling, this post pretty much spoke what I was feeling and thinking. I am slowly getting better tho I know cause I am better than I was years ago. so it dose get better. you just need to keep taking little steps to good health, and you will get there. Like I will.

 
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Old 10-02-2007, 11:29 AM   #3
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Re: PTSD is not a friend

Quote:
Originally Posted by fisbie View Post
I find this is the most confusing thing to have the doctore say it's normal, i just don't feel normal and living with the what ifs just just not good enough. for me living with this is like living, its just so confusing and i would if i will ever feel hole again in instead of feel like it was never ended living in fear. I find it hard to talk with ppl as even if they rays there voices it make me think are they going to hurt me in someway or another. loud noices even make me jump and it there is some on TV that is gross it makes me feel ill and as if it's happening to me, feel real to me though it is on TV. I also wonder if i will ever get over this and feel like a normal person with a normal borring life free of trauma and dramas and pain.
That for me is what i wish for, but i know i will never be the same and the pain will never get better as because of this and the assault has change me and every thing for ever and a day.
If TV or movie has a topic of conflict between people at work, bad boss I can't look at it, it is a huge trigger for me. The way you feel is not abnormal. I was told that ptsd is a dreadful disease, everybody has it to a different extend. I was talking with one therapist who told me that he tought people recognize triggers and how to handle cituation. He doesn't give pills. Unfortinately I can't use this guy 'cause he doesn't understand my accent. He recommended me somebody else. I didn't find time to try yet.

 
Old 10-03-2007, 06:11 AM   #4
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Re: PTSD is not a friend

i find anything with voilents or of past traumas and raised voices and people getting close to in person triggers mine of plus TV and radio. I also hear voices like the people talking to me are really saying these things, but i can never hear the voices clear enough to understand what they are saying, and it really just hurt my head and i feel like my head more confused. The voices feel like a threat to me and i sense fear with them. it's just so hard and confusing from all of this. No one really understands this, not my family, or friends and partner. The only one i don't hear voices with is with my son. I also have bad dreams that is covered in fear and darkness where i feel i am at risk in the dreams and sleep for me is never a good nights sleep. I wakeup feel like i have been through a war and sore. When i watch TV and i see violents seans i feels like i feel there pain and as if it's happening to me in the back my head it hurts, like i am living the pain of the violents or trauma. more of PSTD is like a knight or ongoing threat of confusing eeeeeeeek shivers. there is just no real rest from this disorder. even if i try to reassure myself that i am ok and not at risk of being harmed PSTD, just somes back with vengeance like a plague

Last edited by fisbie; 10-03-2007 at 06:18 PM.

 
Old 10-03-2007, 06:15 PM   #5
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Thumbs down Re: PTSD is not a friend

I really feel that PSTD is way to much to handle and counselling is doing my head in more to the point i just can't take it anymore : is there ever a thing as angel to help I just don't think so an feel so just more darkness from the :

Last edited by fisbie; 10-03-2007 at 06:29 PM. Reason: just feeling this way

 
Old 10-04-2007, 11:44 AM   #6
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Re: PTSD is not a friend

Dear fisbie,

We can all vouch that having PTSD is no "walk in the park" but realize that we are all attempting to cope the best way we can, with the "cards we were dealt."

PTSD is no friend indeed and is more of a psychiatric lifestyle that many are forced to live with.

It varies in degrees but never completely leaves.

We can live with it and learn to cope but the onset of another trauma can send a person spiraling backwards.

Hope must always be present, for where there is hope, there remains possibilities.

Take care and God Bless.

Phoenix
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Old 10-05-2007, 10:46 AM   #7
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Re: PTSD is not a friend

Fisbie..sometimes in the beginning of therapy we all feel as if it is way too much. I always say it's because it's working. When we start to pull out what's been the cause of our PTSD it sets ou rlives in a whirlwing. Keep going in a positive direction. It will get better. Keep the communication open with your therapist. That always helps if they are aware of what you're going through in therapy. Good luck.


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Old 10-05-2007, 09:09 PM   #8
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Re: PTSD is not a friend

Fisbie,

When I began therapy, I felt that I was required to get to the meat of my disturbance. You don't have to do that. Take time to get comfortable with your therapist. Eventually, the harder expressions will come.

As for the painful stressors on television and radio, etc - avoid them. You know which programs will trigger painful reactions. Sometimes a program holds a painful surprise, but many advertise the fact that their content is traumatic.

For me, once I see the trauma on TV, feeling it myself, I freeze. It becomes nearly impossible to look away. It's not easy to avoid the violence and pain that trigger your pain.

Take small steps toward freeing yourself of those triggers. Discuss avoidance of those triggers with your counselor. It will help more than you know. You can do it.

My best,

Shine

 
Old 10-12-2007, 07:51 PM   #9
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Re: PTSD is not a friend

Dear fisbie,

How are things with you?

PTSD, as you can tell, is a disorder to be taken seriously.

Drop us a line, if you feel up to it.

Phoenix
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Old 10-28-2007, 10:10 PM   #10
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Re: PTSD is not a friend

with having ptsd, how does one explain it to people or friends so they don't thinks ur odd or some sick person that they don't want to be around. ??

sometimes i think with having ptsd that it's best to saty away from people, as then it will not happen again...!

Last edited by fisbie; 10-28-2007 at 10:12 PM.

 
Old 11-01-2007, 06:16 PM   #11
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Re: PTSD is not a friend

Quote:
Originally Posted by fisbie View Post
with having ptsd, how does one explain it to people or friends so they don't thinks ur odd or some sick person that they don't want to be around. ??

sometimes i think with having ptsd that it's best to saty away from people, as then it will not happen again...!
Dear fisbie,

Explaining it to others does not automatcally bring with it understanding.

You can break it down to the most simplest of forms and some will either not "get it" or are so closed minded that they don't want to see it.

Others will not know how to respond to you once you divulge this information.

Take care.

Phoenix
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