Okay, this is my first time on here and not sure what to expect but here goes.....I was in the Army for 6 yrs and have some issues with PTSD from time spent in Iraq. My anger is getting way worse, to the point that the other other day I punched my boyfriend(of 3 yrs) 7 times in the head.(By no means do I condone physical violence thats why I know at this point I NEED help) I had no clue that I even hit him let alone hit him 7 times. I have been told, by him, that my anger with others has gotten WAY worse as well. I snap at people for no reason and I am rude when it is not needed. I complaine and gripe about stuff that normally never would have bothered me enough to gripe about. He says that I am minimizing the severity of my anger problem but I dont see it. Can anyone give me advise. I see a shrink normally on a weekly basis but because of our recent move I am trying to get a new doc and have not been seen in 2 months. I wont lie I have noticed that my adgitaion has gotten a lot wrose but I dont see when it comes on. Any help would be greatly welcomed at this point. I dont want anymore meds...it runs in my family to have a highly addictive personality so I have not taken pills in a LONG time because I know that I may have the same personality. Any natural remedies would be great! Meditaion and deep breathing just makes me more mad because I cant clear my mind. I cant sit there long enough without NEEDING to get up and do something. Im just out of ideas at this point but if I dont get this under control I am going to lose the only thing that keeps me somewhat sain. Thanks in advance!
Hello melony. Welcome to the board. First off thank you for what you did for us. I had a guy thank me two days ago and it felt good, so I am passing it on to you.
I understand where you are coming from. Did you and your previous doctor find the causes for your PTSD? Do you know what the trigger was that set you off with your boyfriend? Do you keep a journal of how you react? Take care.
First and formost, thank you so much as well and Happy Veterans Day!!! Well the causes of my PTSD was from the time I spent in Iraq I guess, Im not entierly sure on what you mean by that question. I was med discharged from the Army for PTSD and it was several months after I got back that I even noticed I had some PTSD issues. The morning that this happened was a fine morning(at least i thought) we got up and i was taking him to work so it was pretty early and we stoped at the gas station for a Monster and then went to McDonalds to get him breakfast and I guess I was rude the girl in the drive threw window and he yelled at me for "making him forget his mayo" and thats where it all started. I told him he needs to get his anger under control and then thats basicly the last thing i remember before it was an all out argument. No I do not keep a journal, maybe I should...I have been told it helps and when I have tried it dont normaly go past a weeks worth of journaling.
Ok you answered my questions. Happy Veterns day to you also. Do you recieve help from the VA now for this condition? Are you in therapy now?? If not they are very aware of these conditions bother the soldiers. You must apply within a given period of time.
Have you considered that it may be better if you and your bf were not together as much, until you get this sorted out. The best way to help with this is to confront the issues and then determine what to do from there to help with getting stabilized. The journal may help to determine the triggers.
Last edited by mod-anon; 11-12-2009 at 10:27 PM.
Reason: removed quote
I do see a shrink once a week and I see a PTSD group. My shrinks dont push me to talk about my PTSD issues and I wont talk about them unless they bring them up. I have been 100% with the VA for about 3 yrs now and have not gotten anywhere with them. I still dont leave the house unless i have to or i have an appointment and I still dont watch the news and DONT confrunt my issues. I mean i know I have to but its hard, when I do im in a bad place for a few days after I talk about htem. So, my logic is...if I dont talk about them or have anything that makes think about them Im okay. But its showing more and more lately that I am not and I have no clue what to do about it. Thanks SO much for responding back to me. Its nice to see another vet out there who cares enough to at least listen and give whatever advise they can. THANKS
Well I find if you don't talk then it never has a chance of going away. I do not like the news either. You need to try to find the triggers that you have. Like the news. When you find them then you can look at why and work on one at a time. They can be words, actions, things you see, hear or smell.
I also had a hard time with connecting with people. I tried to go back over there. I wanted to get away from this country, because no one cared. No one understood. I needed to get it out - to tell someone, but I felt no one was there. So I spent the last 30 years figuring out how to manage that.
The memories will never go away, but thats ok. You need to dump the pain that goes with them, that you carry with you now as soon as you can. Don't wait 30 years like I did. Keep it inside is selection A on the menu. Choose B, C, D or E instead.
Keep writing if you are comfortable.
Last edited by reg12; 11-15-2009 at 06:48 AM.
Yes, I have heard that works as well but I seen a therapist that tried to do some kind of hypno therapy on me and it did not work because I can not go under. You are correct Reg....there are guys in my PTSD group that have been dealing with issues since veitnam and desert storm and they are struggeling still like it happened yesterday and I dont want to be like that. Im working on it...Im signed up to go to CORE at the VA its soposed to tell us all about PTSD and what its doing in our brain. An all informational class to tell us what exactly is going on up there in our heads. Ill let ya know how it goes. Thanks for all the info and yall have.
Not doing very well this week. I cant seem to brush this mood. Everytime I go to group or to see my therapist I have a real crappy day but then that ONE crappy day turns into a crappy few days. Then its time for group or to see my therapist and its feeling like a never ending cycle. I hate thinking about this stuff. Thats why I stopped going to the ptsr clinics in the first place. It so much easier to avoid everything and anything that has to do with war or the military. Sorry for the crabbing this time!
I understand what you are talking about completely. I know it hurts. Avoiding the thoughts is a way to handle it, however it keeps the pain and memories locked inside. Sometimes group may not be effective for some. We are individuals, so not everything will work. If you or anyone else would like to talk more about this, its ok to PM me. I do not mind. What you have done I do appreciate. Thanks.
Hey you two. I'm sorry that you're both experiencing the same feelings... Like I said on the other thread - I can only imagine what it would be like - to comprehend what you've both been subjected to. I send you my gratitude in the form of text. (How sad) And can only promise that I am truly grateful for your sacrifices, it does not go unseen.
When you talk about triggers that cause you to have these experiences... Are you talking about certain things that bring up the past? Reg - you mentioned that the news brings back memories? Do you have to avoid the news...? Is there a way to confront it - and try to battle through it? I'm sure you have tried... I'm just curious. If you're comfortable elaborating on this more, I would be glad to hear anything you have to say.
I hate saying this - because it is not the type of movie that I would ever suggest to anyone... However; given the circumstances - I'm going to tough out the possibility of feeling guilty for making this movie suggestion to you two. There is a movie that just came out called, "BROTHERS." It stars Tobey MacGuire and Jake Gyllenhaal. Its a great film... It is probably the most, "RAW," film I have seen all year. I've seen it twice in theaters now... I think - perhaps - it shows the closest indication of what you two are going through... I cried - hard. And I felt anxiety stir within myself while watching it unfold. I know it sounds rediculous; its just a movie... But honestly - there is a really great theme - at the end; IF - you could only manage to make it through the entire film... I think there is a strong indication, of something you BOTH might benefit from seeing. Thought I'd be the one to bring it up... Although - if the news beings back memories; than this movie certainly will, and if there's a reason why I wouldn't want to suggest watching this movie - it would be for the sake of your own well-being...
Anyways. I'm sorry you're both experiencing this. I hope you all the best. You deserve to be happy, free from the past. Don't stop striving for bliss. It exists.
Hi 8800GTS. The memories of the past will never go away, only distort a little with time. Watching the news where another person's life was wasted in a far away place makes one think of picking up what was left of several friends. I consider it useless killing. So I do not watch the news for that reason.
I have no problem elaborating. Sometimes other people seem to have a problem with the facts. For example the army called it non-hostile action one time when two of my friends were lost. Another lost both legs. We were being shelled by our own 155s. I was talking to one guy, then 30 seconds later he took a direct hit. It took about 30 minutes to pick him up, so the dogs and rats wouldn't. We had a good supply of sandwich bags. That will always seem very hostile to me. He was from California. I always wished I could have told his family, his last words, but the government did not allow that. They are both on panel 56E, line 4. I will not ever forget them.
Hi there 8800GTS, Thanks for the kind words but I tried watching some war movie that came out a few years ago(it had jessica beal in it i think) and it put me in a full out panic attack. I can no longer watch anything that even talks about Iraq (if i watch anything its the cartoon network or spongebob, i know comming from a 28 yr old woman that sounds kind of silly but it takes me out of real life and I dont have to think about anything) So, I totally understand where reg12 is comming from. Things like that bring up so much that sometimes it is too hard to handle, for me. I also have a lot of guilt for getting hurt and not being able to go back and bring my soldiers home. Then I lost one of them when I was recovering and didnt know about it and got a letter from my gunner telling me it was my fault for not coming back and taking care of them. How in gods green earth do I take that off my back? reg12 where is panel 56E line 4? I hope yall have a grand holiday season. Oh, one more thing how can you im somebody in here?