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Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Message Board


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Old 03-18-2012, 05:06 PM   #1
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Isolation and PTSD

I have a so-so friend. At least it could have been a friendship if I allowed myself. Since I got injured, Ive had so many different symptoms. My PTSD acting up, the Oxy addiction and the side effects of it, the body pain that completely had me down and then my injury.

She is the type if you dont call her all the time, and put in quality time with her, then you must not be a good friend. Well this past 12 months has been sheer hell for me, I didnt want to call her, could have cared less to see her, and really just wanted to be left alone. I let her know about my problems, tried to explain it is me, not her but slowly her calls to me pretty much dried up. In fact she stopped by once in all that time to see how I was. All this time I have felt so guilty for letting this friendship down. Why I have dumped it all on me, I dont know.

Anyway, since the Cymbalta has given me a reprieve for awhile, I called and made lunch plans with her for this Wednesday, even though I dont really want to go. I will be stressed out when I get home, and it is just a set up for anxiety. But out of guilt I made the plans anyway.

Has your PTSD ever made you not want to be around other people? I want a friend, but dont really know how to have one or keep one. She is the only friend Ive had since High School. In fact, I worked as a School Bus driver for 14+ years and never made a friend, and nobody from there has ever called to even ask why I wasnt at work. This is a major defect in me. I feel inferior to the "normal" people out there. And I feel that a real friend, would understand how hard it is for me, and meet me half way, or all the way.. till I felt comfortable. Is this normal or am I just expecting others to do all the work to build a friendship?

 
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Old 03-18-2012, 06:13 PM   #2
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Re: Isolation and PTSD

Pamela,

The nature of PTSD causes many people to either isolate or become "that person" who puts a serious strain on relationships.

I believe it has to do with the uncomfortability of self;always on alert and the inability to remain consistent.Easily irritated.

The healthy part of you is feeling guilty and at the same time realizes that it takes a lot of work to be that cordial host;entertaining seems to become more of a chore than anything else.

Don't get me wrong,it's doable but you have already identified how you will feel at the end of the day.

You are not alone in feeling this way.

Respectfully
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Old 03-18-2012, 06:24 PM   #3
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Re: Isolation and PTSD

Gosh Phoenix, all these years I have put myself down for not being able to reach out and be the friendly host.

And yes, the healthy part "wants" to entertain, so I agree to have family over for holidays, etc. The planning, and cooking and decorating I love, but when they all come over, I am lost, and wonder why I always agree to do it. No wonder I found myself drinking way too much on those days. I just wanted to escape.

I wonder why it took so long for me to ask questions about my PTSD. I could have saved myself years of hating who I was.

 
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Old 03-18-2012, 07:23 PM   #4
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Re: Isolation and PTSD

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Originally Posted by Arianna2 View Post
I wonder why it took so long for me to ask questions about my PTSD. I could have saved myself years of hating who I was.
Pamela,

It's never too late to learn a little something new and before you know it,tomorrow will be here and along with it the opportunity to be further enlightened by life.
We live and learn;it's the retaining and applying what we learn efficiently that will get us to the next day........and the next(and so on).....

Hopefully.

With respect and sincerity,
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Old 03-20-2012, 07:37 PM   #5
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Re: Isolation and PTSD

I just have a short comment. PTSD takes so much work to maintain, and to keep stoking the flames, per say. Why on earth do we do it?

 
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Old 03-20-2012, 07:44 PM   #6
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Re: Isolation and PTSD

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Originally Posted by Arianna2 View Post
I just have a short comment. PTSD takes so much work to maintain, and to keep stoking the flames, per say. Why on earth do we do it?
Pamela,

The answer to your question is because we are left with only a few other alternatives.......visit the Grim Reaper and play cards with him,or giving ourselves a chance to survive.

Our PTSD symptoms are exactly what keep us remaining survivors alive;it's a basic instinct.

The healthy part of us won't allow us to give up;even though it is in the minority percent.

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Last edited by Phoenix; 03-20-2012 at 08:03 PM.

 
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Old 07-29-2012, 06:52 PM   #7
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Re: Isolation and PTSD

It's extremely frustrating and discouraging, but what else 'can' we do?

 
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Old 08-04-2012, 03:17 AM   #8
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Re: Isolation and PTSD

I was kidnapped over 30 years ago and am totally a hermit. I never got married and never had children. Not the life I would have picked for myself but after finding out there are evil people out there I was determined that no one will ever harm me again and no one has.I'm used to being alone and need to be alone but my future is pretty pathetic to be honest. But at least I have my cats!!
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