ainfante

What you are going through is totally normal. I have perimenopause but have had a child and it can be a totally new world, in which it is. Your hormones are not declining together which is leaving you postpartum due to hormonal changes and swift. Try to relax, try a little self hypnosis or listen to hypnosis tapes and read as much as you can about depression in postpartum. This will help you to accept. Please accept what you are going through, face your fears, we are here for you on the board, maybe not 24/7, but we are here. Talk to your doctor as much as you can or seek Postpartum therapy. Do you have insurance? If you do, I would seek a therapist knowledgeable in postpartum and there should be plenty of them at the hospital/clinic. Do not worry, you will not die, and you will not harm your baby. Just try to relax, let nature take its course with your child and try not to worry too much about the baby. Of course, if the baby has a high fever, by all means take the baby into the doctor or ER, but do not worry about the baby, nature will take its course. Just feed and change the baby as needed, required and allow yourself to relax with your new child. Many of us go through this, you are not alone. And it will pass, just allow time to pass and you will adjust. Do not run from your panic, ride them through, take your meds when needed, accept your panic, desensitize (don't pay attention to your body symptoms) and let time pass. The Zoloft will begin to work soon, so if you have Xanax or any other type of benzo, take it pinch by pinch so you can see how much your body needs and just talk everything out. Keep talking. If you find your mind racing in panic, go find a piece of paper and just write, write, write, read it back and then tear it up if you choose. This will allow your mind to freely release the overload. Any other questions you have, please don't hesitate to contact us on this board. You will be okay.

ANdrea