It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Pregnancy Message Board
Post New Thread   Closed Thread
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 08-05-2004, 10:47 AM   #1
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: California
Posts: 83
MandyS HB User
Fear of losing baby

I am 20 weeks now with my first and am starting to have this paraniod feeling of great fear of losing my baby. It started a few days ago. I am now more emotional and weepy than ever. Just the thought of losing my baby makes me cry. I can't shake the thought. I am home alone for one week and last night I woke up at one and were freaked out that a stranger was entering my home. I was terrified and cried and cried at the thought of my baby being in harm. There was no one there, I must have dreamt or something and did not go back to sleep for the rest of the night because I was too scared to fall a sleep just in case. Today just telling someone else the story made me cry rivers. I am so scared something could happen to my baby. Is this feeling normal?

 
Old 08-05-2004, 04:19 PM   #2
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 796
brwneyez9 HB User
Re: Fear of losing baby

You are not alone. I have that same fear. I am almost 34 weeks. I keep thinking that this is to good to be true. I wonder will i really be having a baby in like 6 weeks and bring her home. I worry that she won't be coming home. What really got me is i watched one of the last episodes of ER and now i can't get over it.

 
Sponsors Lightbulb
   
Old 08-05-2004, 06:14 PM   #3
Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 472
Hope2Heal HB User
Re: Fear of losing baby

Hi there

I am at 13 weeks. For the most part i have not been worrying too much. but last night I had a bad dream so when i saw your post i had to reply. I dreamed I lost the baby and I was so devastated. Everything was going through my head about having to tell people, and would I ever be able to get preg again and even if I do It will be like starting from scratch again. My boobs and belly got smaller like before i was preg and i felt such a loss!! I woke up feeling soooooo relieved that it was a dream. Then worried all day. A coworker who was preg same week as me did loose her baby a few weeks ago. So i am aware of the reality. It also helps me empathize better with others who have gone through this pain.

I do know that people have wacky dreams when pregnant and I am sure most of these dreams are not prophetic. I have had plenty of good dreams too, of seeing the baby on an ultrasound thriving and looking healthy.

Try not to focus on what can go wrong and think about all that can go right. Fantasize instead of terrorizing yoruself.

I do understand the fears that come from bad dreams. Good luck to both of us!!
__________________
H2H

 
Old 08-05-2004, 06:40 PM   #4
Veteran
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Illinois, USA
Posts: 388
Falynsmommy HB User
Re: Fear of losing baby

Mandy,

I went through the exact same thing when I was pregnant. I even posted a thread about it titled Needless Worry, which I'm sure you could dig up in the archives if you'd like to read it. I also suffer from nightmares sometimes that seem to happen when my fears about something are at their worst, then the nightmare just amplifies the bad feelings. I was so scared I was going to lose my daughter it was just insane. I have never suffered through a miscarriage or a stillbirth or anything as horrible as that, so it seemed like my fears were unwarranted. Honestly, I think it is a hormonal thing and I believe many pregnant women go through these feelings. As rough as these feelings are, at least you know you are not being irrational and you are not alone. My advice would be to talk to your doctor about all the feelings you are having. He/she can at least give you the facts about things and it may help.

Have faith. I now have a beautiful 3 and a half month old daughter who is right now smiling because it is her bedtime and she doesn't think so.

Take care and I wish you a happy, safe, and healthy pregnancy and labor.

Mandy

 
Old 08-06-2004, 01:38 PM   #5
Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 472
Hope2Heal HB User
Re: Fear of losing baby

Hello again

Of course since i had that dream yesterday, and already felt bad feeelings, I just had to sit through an episode of ER and the woman's baby dies and she had to give birth to a stillborn. I cried through the whole ending. It was very depressing. My husband watched it with me and he was like"don' t worry you'll be fine." It was good to hear him say that but it was still very sad. Life can be harsh but it can be good too. Guess you always have to be ready for anything. . .
__________________
H2H

 
Old 08-06-2004, 02:19 PM   #6
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 796
brwneyez9 HB User
Re: Fear of losing baby

That is the same episode of ER that i saw. The closer i got to being stage of pregnancy as the girl in show(noah's girlfriend). She was like 7 months. I can't image having to go to the hosptial have the baby that you know isn't alive and then have to come home without your baby. I think about that episode every time my little girl doesn't move. Once i start think of that it's like she know and she gives me a kick or something. It's like she saying hey mom i am fine, it's ok don't worry. My husband said the samething after we watched that episode and anytime a show comes on with something like that in it he changes the channel. He knows i am emotional and doesn't want me to think like that. I think those shows bothers him too.He always gives me a big huge and rubs my belly and says our little girl is going to be just fine. Like he needs to reassure himself too. I guess as a mother weather baby is here or not your worry about them. I think our worrying from here on out is stuck with us. We are always going to worry even after they are born. Until we are gone. It's natural for us to worry about what could happen to our children.

 
Old 08-06-2004, 03:05 PM   #7
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Colorado
Posts: 2,199
nyxin HB Usernyxin HB Usernyxin HB User
Re: Fear of losing baby

it is funny that you are all talking about that ER episode. my son was as close to a still born as you can get. his agpar score was only 2 out of 10. when my husband and i watched that we both wept and it messed us up for days after. my son is great now, thanks to the great neo-natal team. i am now pregnant again, after having a m/c in march. i think about that ER episode every day. no kidding. it has gotten into my head and won't leave. i have this nagging little voice about 'cord accidents' and now i am sooooooo worried about birth defects. i never was like this when i was first pg with my son, but i have been to the brink of devestation, and crossed edge as well, so i have a history now with bad things, so i guess i feel like i am easier to seek out. does anyone else fear birth defects? i feel like writting ER and telling them they went WAY too far.
__________________
Married October 02
DS Caden Grey June 03
DS Morgan Keenan March 05
C-Section Aug 1st 08 with baby BOY #3
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!

 
Old 08-06-2004, 03:23 PM   #8
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: California
Posts: 83
MandyS HB User
Re: Fear of losing baby

Oh thank you for your replies. Luckily I did not see the ER episode. I tend to be obscessive and I would probably replay it in my head over and over. Too bad this emotion seems to be normal (or, thank God it is) at least I know I am not over the edge, like I thought I was. I was wondering if my thoughts of fear made me belong in a nut house. Thanks for sharing your experiences.

Mandy

 
Old 08-06-2004, 08:30 PM   #9
Senior Member
(female)
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 120
mrsb816 HB User
Re: Fear of losing baby

I have also seriously considered writing to ER and telling them that show crossed the line. Does anyone know how often cord accident happen? Its something that I worry about all the time now. I also worry about birth defects and if I could possibly be doing something that could hurt my son without even realizing it. I don't post on here often but I do read post daily and its so nice to see that I'm not alone in the things I'm experiencing and how scared I get. I'm really thankful for this supportive community. Good luck to all of you ladies and your babies.

 
Old 08-07-2004, 03:32 PM   #10
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Utah
Posts: 567
Zayazmama HB User
Re: Fear of losing baby

I, too, worry about losing my baby. I am only a mere 7 wks though. At least, from my 'guesstimation" that is how far along I am. Havent been to 1st appt yet (will go on Aug 10). This is my 4th pregnancy. So far, I only have 1 child as a result, and he decided to grace us with his presence 11 wks early, but he was healthy for the most part, just really small. Anyway, After him (born in 1997), I had a molar pregnancy in 2000, and in 2002 I was pregnant, but the baby was considered stillborn at 5 mos pregnant. So...needless to say, I am nervous. Baby daddy just keeps telling me to relax and not worry about it, but he has no clue about what we, as women, go through. I try to relax. I keep telling myself that as long as I am sick, and my boobs hurt, that it must be a good sign. I hope my assumption is right. I havent had any pain or bleeding, thank goodness. I dont know. Being pregant is like an emotional roller coaster for most of us. Bumpy at time, but worth the worry in a lot of cases....Anyway, i had to get that out...

Hope all is well.....

 
Old 08-11-2004, 12:36 PM   #11
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: California
Posts: 83
MandyS HB User
Re: Fear of losing baby

Gosh, as if my regular fear of losing my son wasn't enough. I posted another post about Bicornuate uterus, and all the things I found out about it are not encouraging. I am 21 weeks now and my baby is on my right side. I am going in for another ultrasound in two weeks. Say a few prayers for me pals.

 
Old 08-13-2004, 04:48 PM   #12
Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Posts: 347
beabonnet HB User
Re: Fear of losing baby

Quote:
Originally Posted by mrsb816
I have also seriously considered writing to ER and telling them that show crossed the line. Does anyone know how often cord accident happen? Its something that I worry about all the time now. I also worry about birth defects and if I could possibly be doing something that could hurt my son without even realizing it. I don't post on here often but I do read post daily and its so nice to see that I'm not alone in the things I'm experiencing and how scared I get. I'm really thankful for this supportive community. Good luck to all of you ladies and your babies.
I think they shouldn't have shown that either. At the time I saw it, I was pretty close to delivery time and my baby had not moved as much that day.

At the same time, though, this is not the first time they should an episode dealing with pregnancy that was very upsetting. THe first ER episode I ever saw involved a woman who's was misdiagnosed. They missed pre-eclampsia and sent her home with antibiotics for a urinary tract infection instead. I kept watching the show that night more in horror and hope that it would end up ok than for any other reason. I won't go into the details, but it was pretty bad - in some ways much worse than the cord episode. Let's just say that the ER handled a c-section unsure of what they were doing because they couldn't get an OB to come down from the OB department - they were all busy. The mother ended up dying and the baby survived.

That episode certainly didn't help me when my blood pressure had gone up and I was on bed rest waiting to be induced.,

 
Old 08-13-2004, 06:34 PM   #13
Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 472
Hope2Heal HB User
Re: Fear of losing baby

Well I guess some of us shouldn't watch shows like these then

I have been feeling emotionally a lot better. Maybe because the kids are back to school this week( I am a teacher) and i have been consumed with lesson planning, and other work the past 2 weeks, so being focused on that gives me less time to think about my worries. I guess thats the best thing to do, give yourself different stress to distract you from your original stress.
Good luck everyone
__________________
H2H

Last edited by Hope2Heal; 08-13-2004 at 06:35 PM.

 
Old 08-14-2004, 07:33 PM   #14
Senior Veteran
 
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: U.S.A
Posts: 718
Chrissi HB User
Re: Fear of losing baby

i did this with my first pregnancy i was so scared to lose my baby grl.....
i got so bad that i wouldnt even do anything in fear of losing her.

and i have to tell you i had the "this is to good to be true" thing in my head too but i can tell you ....it isnt to good to be true.....it is real and your babies will be fine!

my little girl is 10 months old now and happy and healthy....

and i will say a prayer or two for you all.

and yes stop watching anything to do with bad things that can happen, and stop reading them as well.
__________________
Married:7-18-2004
DD Born:10-13-2003
DS Born: 5-04-2005

 
Old 08-15-2004, 07:45 AM   #15
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 796
brwneyez9 HB User
Re: Fear of losing baby

Man i had another nightmare last night. I went to the hosptial to have the baby. They told me i was ready to push and then all the sudden she said not to. I was like what is going on. She said she was going to have turn the baby she wasn't in the right position. Then i woke up. so i don't know if it ended good or not. I did scare me a little bit. I don't want anything to happen or go wrong.

 
Closed Thread

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
I need help with taking Klonopin for panic disorder / agoraphobia / fear of meds ryguy79 Phobias 8 12-29-2008 06:32 PM
Fear of heights? Connected with danger? jgr01 Bipolar Disorder 10 04-14-2007 05:46 PM
I fear that Im losing him Lissy718 Relationship Health 13 10-02-2006 04:15 PM
37 weeks pregnant and beginning to fear... cujo00coughlin Pregnancy 6 03-11-2006 09:24 AM
Fear of Failure MedWannabe Relationship Health 1 01-15-2006 04:52 PM




Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




Join Our Newsletter

Stay healthy through tips curated by our health experts.

Whoops,

There was a problem adding your email Try again

Thank You

Your email has been added








TOP THANKED CONTRIBUTORS



Seraph (6), quinyonna07 (2), Kali333 (2), cattieos (2), mumovhann (2), kittenkaboodle (2), Xkwizit (2), TwinMamma (2), Administrator (1), Blastoff9600 (1)

Site Wide Totals

teteri66 (1136), MSJayhawk (941), Apollo123 (858), janewhite1 (823), Titchou (772), Gabriel (743), ladybud (667), sammy64 (666), midwest1 (655), BlueSkies14 (610)



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 06:00 AM.



Site owned and operated by HealthBoards.com™
Copyright and Terms of Use © 1998-2014 HealthBoards.comô All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!