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Old 10-02-2005, 05:09 PM   #1
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I am not excited

I am really not excited about being pregnant. I have not been since I found out. My husband is very excited on the other hand. It's my first baby and I am not mad about it but I haven't been excited since I found out. I feel like now I need to give my life up for this kid.

I am tired of people talking about it at work. I work with a lot of woman and they constantly feel they need to talk to me about being pregnant. I can't stand it. They come up and rub my stomach all the time. I told one lady to stop the other day because I was so crabby that day.

I don't know. I feel like I may burden this kid. I mean I plan to supply it with all she needs. Me and my husband are very financially stable. But I still have things left I wanted to do. I guess he's excited because it's his first baby as well as mine. Nad I can't bring up the subject of adoption to him because that's out of the question.

I'm also developed gestational diabetes with this baby. And now it has left me depressed and everything. I am seeing a doctor about all the this on thursday. But as of right now that is how I feel. I wish I could get excited about this baby but I am not. I had to stop going out and hanging out with friends. Most of them don't even call me anymore. Oh well. Only three months left.

 
Old 10-02-2005, 05:52 PM   #2
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Re: I am not excited

You're not the only one, so please don't think you are. I remember feeling the same way as you. I was only 21 at the time and now all of a sudden I was gonna be a mom. But then again me and my DH weren't being very careful. We knew what we were doing, and figured if it happened it happened. Didn't happen for 3 months, so we though it would keep going that route...wrong. I remember being mad that I couldn't go out with my friends, I coudln't drink, my clothes weren't fitting, I was constanly sick in my first trimester, I was always so tired that I couldn't and didn't want to do anything besides sleep. My DH was so excited that he was going to have his little "cubbie" fan in 9 months, but me on the other hand; I was a wreck. All anyone wanted to talk about was what I should do and shouldn't do...what I should eat and shouldn't eat. It got so political that I hated being pregnant. I cried to my DH telling him that I wasn't happy...I wasn't excited and if I could do it over again we would have used some sort of contraceptive. But luckily as soon as I got into my 3rd month and heard my sons heartbeat for the first time and saw him for the first time 2 months later via ultrasound i couldn't help but be overjoyed at what was growing inside of me. i could have cared less about the stretch marks and the constand peeing and waddling like a duck. Ooh and when your kid starts to kick like letting you know "hey mom i'm in here" it's amazing. In May my lil bambino was born and now I can't imagine our lives without him. He brings more joy to us than ever thought possible. When this baby looks up at you and knows your his mom...it's a heartwarming/tear jerking experience. I still tend to cry when I look at our son and gaze in awe that the love DH and i share, brought this little creature into our lives. I am now 22 and have only 2 years of college finished and that's just the basics! Believe me when I say i was more than upset, but I plan on going back and getting my degree..it can be done....it WILL be done. Might take some time, but i'd choose my son over a degree anyday. I truley hope the best for you and your family. Have a healthy and happy 9 months!
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Last edited by PrittyGreenEyez; 10-02-2005 at 06:00 PM.

 
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Old 10-02-2005, 06:24 PM   #3
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Re: I am not excited

Perhaps you should talk to your doctor about your problem, you sounds really depressed. When I began reading your post I thought I could identify, I am 3 months and so far it doesn't seem real and and others are really excited, but I don't feel much yet, I actually feel very normal like I am not even pregnant. But I accept what coming and I know I will get excited about it. I am not excited about having a little baby, I like children that are more active or ones that talk and walk. You sound very visibly upset over this. Even being married and having an excited husband and being well established and thinking about adoption, I am wondering if it is something more and you should seek for doctors advice. I am not trying to sound mean or rude, but are you self-fish because you said you don't want to give up your life because you went out before? Life doesn't have to be over because you have a child, have the baby, get back into shape and keep going, because you have a child doesn't mean you entire life has to change, just make the nessecary adjustments. I somewhat identify with you, because I always said I never wanted kids because I like a nice house, and certain things, and being able to be on the go if I want. I understand.....but now, I will still be on the go, show my child cool stuff and teach it interesting things. It is about putting it all into perspective and you may very well feel differently in a couple of months or when the baby is born. Do you know what the sex is???
I really do wish you well!

 
Old 10-03-2005, 05:18 AM   #4
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Re: I am not excited

I completely agree with Orange, you may be depressed. Depression can be confusing for women when it occurs during pregnancy. They can't figure out why they feel bad during a time when they should feel good. However, up to 10% of women will experience depression during pregnancy. The most likely women to have depression during pregnancy have a personal or family history of depression.

Please let you doctor know your feelings (if you haven't already) because I can't imagine how bad you will feel postpartum. Have you planned on having children? Are these feelings new?
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Old 10-03-2005, 09:01 AM   #5
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Re: I am not excited

First of all depression and anxiety in pregnancy does happen , its a given, also I think everywoman goes through this even if they have been trying for years and finally get pregnant, it is life altering, I still have my days where Im excited and then Im like " what was I thinking" becasue this is number three and I had a good routine and now we are having yet another baby, but like I said we all go through this, I am 27 and just before I got preggo this time it was the beginning of the summer and I was having a blast me and dh , going out all the time enjoying the fact that my kids could play alone withought having to be changed and stuff, so I too went throught this huge "what did I do" but I am happy now, still have my days but I chalk it up tp normal, I had some bleeding early on and thoght I would lose the baby and was a nut case so happy I didnt and a little time after that felt like why am I in this situation? Its all hormones dont worry it will all into place, and if it oesnt there are things you can talk to your dr. about to help you out

Valerie

 
Old 10-03-2005, 01:21 PM   #6
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Re: I am not excited

For me it just never seemed real to me. I kept thinking I should be excited about the whole thing. Wasn't until I had my ultrasound and he really started moving around that the reality of it hit home. But once DS was born, I was sooo thrilled. Such a cute little peanut...

 
Old 10-03-2005, 02:19 PM   #7
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Re: I am not excited

I can almost bet that once you deliver your little one and you see that face your feelings will change. You will surely fall in love. For now talk to your DR about it, you could be depressed and maybe there is something he can suggset to make the rest of your pregnancy happier for you. Good luck!

 
Old 10-03-2005, 02:45 PM   #8
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Re: I am not excited

I understand where you're coming from. When I found out I was pg w/#1, it was almost like a tradgedy to me. My BF and I weren't married (still aren't), and not getting along that well. All 9 months I felt terrible because I just wasn't excited at all...I felt like a horrible mother. It made it worse when people around me were so excited and I felt notheing but shame and regret. The tables turned QUICKLY when my son was born. I still can't believe how much love I have for him...Now I'm pg w/#2...and kind of feeling the same way...I know things will changes once I see him or her for the first time, and I'm sure that it will for you too...

I HAVE read that sometimes it takes a while, weeks or a few months, or mothers to bond with their babies after birth...

I wish you much luck!!
Jenn

 
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