I have just had a baby, well 3 months ago! i had a tough labour and also had to go back to hospital due to an infection where they left placenta tissue inside! but i have overcome all of that.
I just loved being pregnant, and all that came with it! (i must be mad) i even sit there and think about how much i loved the labour which hurt but the whole experience was amazing!!
I have a steady partner, a good home, money is good too. I obviosly want to lose my pregnacy weight first and get to know little girl who i completely adore! she is amazing and so well bahaved! but i know i will want another very soon! my friend is pregnant too and i love watching her tummy grow!
Anyone else have these feelings after giving birth not so long ago?
You are MAD!!! Just kidding I did have that feeling right after my daughter was born ten years ago. I even thought I was pregnant and was so excited. But I wasnt and then decided to wait a year just to get back to a normal routine. Well ten years later im finally pregnant, Im not sure I love being pregnant this time its been totally differant and well not so wonderful but I know that we are going to get started again pretty soon afterward. Im 30 and we want four kids and would rather them sooner than later. I have a 35 year cut off, after that Im done.
My sister conceived again (on purpose) less than a year after her first child!
It actually turned out wonderful because her children (age 2ish and 1ish) are
best friends! I personally never saw any jealousy!
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I can totally relate. I really missed being pregnant after I had my son 2 years ago. I loved it so much, in fact, that I had "phantom baby movements" as I call them (kind of like when someone has a limb amputated and can feel pain in the limb that isn't even there-only this was not painful). I never felt more healthy or beautiful than when I was pg with him.
ofh ladies i am jealous of these good feelings you have of being pg i feel physically a wreck and although i would like mor e children in future (i think) i shall have to wait for the memories of the tiredness, sicknesss, aching, uncomfortableness to subside first. i hope i pick up some of your positive vibes, oh obviously i am happy about being pg i just feel like i have been physically and mentally tortured lol.
You say you have a steady partner...does that mean your married or not married? It is most beneficial for your child to be married to your partner. I would square away that before creating another child.
If you don't think marriage makes a difference then I would say your mad to have another baby. That is my answer to your question. Your child is better off with a mother and a father who are committed and married to one another. I am not asking the question for you to answer on the board, but only to think about.....why have you been with someone for 5 years and there is no marriage? What is the delay. It takes a year and a half to get to know someone. Is he hesitant to marry you because he is getting everything he wants from you without taking the next step? Are you independant? I am not replying to make you mad, only to get you to think. Evidently things are changing where people don't get married, men don't have to earn the right to be with the women, it is all free to take now. It is quite sad because the children are the ones who are paying the price for our adult mistakes. I know most women grow up wishing to be married, I never heard of someone wishing to grow up and have babies with someone after being together 5 years and not want to me married. (I realize I will probably get alot of hate posts back. However, this post is for TallGirl in hopes of realizing that she is mad to want another baby.)
I WISH I could enjoy being pregnant. I had it hard in the beginning, bitnow it is ok .I am just not used to all the extra weight and it is hard on my body.
I say go for it if it is what you want! You seem to have a stable, loving home and I think any child would thrive in a loving, caring home. Heck, I am sure NO ONE would deny Oprah a child just because she is not married. BUT, that is what opinions are for and this is why we have them.
I only hope after I give birth that I am that willing to go through it again!
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I think that it is wonderful that you want another child. My husband and I tried for SEVERAL years before conceiving and although this pregnancy has been a little trying, I am overall enjoying all of the changes. It has made me realize what I was missing all of these years. I will probably want another right after this one, but I am so happy that God blessed us with this child I wouldn't dare want to seem greedy. I know for me personally, it took alot of effort for us to conceive and I wouldn't want to take the time that you have to give for fertility treatment away from the new baby. However, if I conceived naturally I would be ecstatic.
I say do what you feel. My husband and I lived together for many years before marrying and it was really no one elses business what we did in our lives. Our decision to wait was definitely not a lack of love or commitment, we had our own reasons, personal reasons. We were trying to conceive before being married.
Good luck to you and congrats on your new little one!!!!!
Unfortunately, some people seem to think the paper work is the most important thing in order to raise beautiful, healthy, inteligent babies. I would say something has clouded this person's judgement. Many people go on to having wonderful children without ever marrying their partner. I, myself, am not married. I do intend on marrying eventually, but its just not a priority at this point. Taking care of our DS and providing all we can is.
As for wanting another child so soon, YES WOMAN! YOU ARE MAD! No, I am just kidding. I too think about having another one, but not so soon. I have my hands full right now. I want to have my babies close together to prevent an age gap, but I just don't know how soon. I think when he is 2 is a good time to have another.
I agree with Roxy as far as wanting another so soon! The reason my advice is different and I believe marriage is important is because of the kids. I don't care of people shack up and never get married but I believe it is a different story when you involve innocent children and bring them into those situations, especially when it isn't just an accident but on purpose. Children always pay the price for adults mistakes like chosing the wrong guy, working too much, etc. Also I believe in setting the best examples for children as you possibly can. I wouldn't want my daughter to grow up thinking it is okay to bear some man's child, live with him and no commintment. I would be very dissapointed in her for giving herself to someone so freely like that. I don't mean to make you feel bad, or angery, etc. It is just a different view from what everyone else seems to have that I think is legit.
I am not just saying a piece of paper makes you a better parent. What about setting examples for your daughter? You want her to grow up and think it is okay to move in with guys and give herself to them, make some babies and never get married? Maybe she will because she sees that you do it! My point is the kids, they are the ones who pay the price. Evidently people don't understand that anymore and chose to decide based on their own selfish needs and I am done here. Marriage is not also "just a piece of paper." It is taking that next step and committing to each other in front of God, family and freinds. It is about tieing your lifes together in a more permanant fashion. Marriage is serious and the fact that you look at it like it is just "a piece of paper" screams that your not ready for marriage or probably another baby. You don't seem to take these things seriously. Marriage and other people's lives are not disposable. Good luck in your future endeavors.