Hi all! I am almost due for my 20 week ultrasound at the end of this month.
This pregnancy has been really hard on me because I have been sick the whole time. I have thrown up so many times in the last few months I feel like my stomach is just thrashed. My doc put me on zofran which helped a lot, but I am just now trying to take pre-natal vitamins and I feel awful that I did not take them from the start. I just could not take anything at all, not even food. I thought that I would be feeling much better as my pregnancy progresses, but I just feel the same. I have a two year old daughter who is a handful so I am not able to take care of myself like I did the first time around. Fortunately I only throw up maybe 3 or 4 times a week instead of every daylike I used to. Do any of you guys feel this way?
I guess I would also like to hear your thoughts on certain issues I am dealing with. Any input would help:
I have a two year old daughter who I feel like I am abandoning because I am having another child. It took me a long time to get to a place where I could bond with her and now I am having another one. I feel guilty and fearful about how I am going to care for her as well as I do after the next baby comes. I do not want to even be away from her when I deliver and stay at the hospital. I have been sleeping with her at night(I know that is not the greatest thing to do) But I cannot seem to get her to sleep any other way. Her father is a little irritated over this because I have not slept in the bed with him for quite some time now. But to be honest, I would rather sleep with her. Has anyone else felt this kind of guilt? Or am I just hormonal and irrational. I do not know.
I would like to hear any thoughts on depression and antidepressants during pregnancy. I have a history of major depression and have quit taking my ads against my therapists advice.
I am debating over wether I want pain meds at my labor and delivery. With my first, I had an epidural and it was great to not have to feel the pain the first time around. But with this pregnancy I want more control over my experience. I felt so powerless the first pregnancy listening to anyone and everyone who had advice and I was very fearful as well. I want to be able to push my baby out when my body tells me to, not when some mean old nurse tells me that I am having a contraction and to push for ten seconds. I also do not want to be flat on my back when I deliver. Does anyone else feel the same?