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Old 02-06-2003, 02:47 PM   #1
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WorriedGuy HB User
My girlfriend may be pregnant... please help.. (15 yrs)

Hi...

My girlfriend and I had sex for the first time roughly 3 weeks ago... We are both 15 years of age. I was ignorant, and did not use a condom. I wasn't worried about getting any type of disease, because we were both virgins. We have had sex on 3 seperate occasions. I did not ejaculate in her. But, I never used a condom, nor is she on birth controll.. I thought nothing of this, because I did not come in her. BUT, recently I was told that a small amout of sperm containing semen is emited from the penis during sex before you ejaculate. We stopped way before I began to climax, but still, I dont know if this is true or not. My girlfriend says she feels different, and says her stomach is beginning to swell a little. Neither mine, nor her parents know we had sex.

I dont know if she is pregnant or not... Im aware the cost of an abortion is roughly $400, which I can produce if need be, but that is going to include telling both of our parents. Basically, if she IS pregnant, we will never be able to be together again.

I have been with her for almost 2 years, and she means everything to me... I've never been so terrified.

I cant talk to anyone about this, so please... Help me if you have any ideas...

-Worried Guy. Las Vegas

 
Old 02-06-2003, 02:50 PM   #2
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spoiled_fun HB User
Re: My girlfriend may be pregnant... please help.. (15 yrs)

I dont know what your thoughts are on abortions-but they are against my religion-i am 20 right now but was 16 when i got pregnant i lost it because i didnt know i was so i stilll continued sports-but my opinion is if this was 3 weeks ago she should take a pg test and see what it says

 
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Old 02-06-2003, 03:16 PM   #3
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WorriedGuy HB User
Re: My girlfriend may be pregnant... please help.. (15 yrs)

I just got off the phone with her, and she said her breasts are sore... she said it feels like they are growing...

 
Old 02-06-2003, 03:18 PM   #4
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Temperamental HB User
Re: My girlfriend may be pregnant... please help.. (15 yrs)

The pull out method is NOT safe and can result in a pregnancy. Just hope she gets her next period. PLease use condoms and you can get them for very cheap at planned parenthood. Your girlfriend might want to consider some birth control pills, which she can also get at planned parenthood I'm not sure their policy though on patients under 18 I think I was 17 when I started going there but that was a LONG time ago and i didn't need my parents permission back then.

Good luck. Any more questions please ask.

 
Old 02-06-2003, 04:23 PM   #5
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aVeRyPaSsiOnATegiRL HB User
Re: My girlfriend may be pregnant... please help.. (15 yrs)

Hi WorriedGuy, I know how you feel, believe me. If you skip over a page or two on the PREGNANCY PAGE, you will see I just recently was worried about me myself being pregnant. I had had unprotected sex, like you, and he did not ejaculate in me, but still, there is a substance containing sperm that does come out before the real thing. And yes, even the tiniest drop CAN and WILL in many cases get a girl pregnant. That is why it is very important, that if you are going to have unprotected sex, that you make sure she is on birth control, which still, has failed.

I felt very stupid, (not saying you two are stupid, because by no means are you) after I had unprotected sex...even if it's only for a few minutes, you can still get pregnant, and it does happen...

NOW, this does not mean your girlfriend is pregnant. I cannot stress how important it is that she NOT freak out. The more she thinks to herself "oh God I'm pregnant", the more symptoms she will "see". Our bodies listen to our heads, and the more we tell ourselves we have something, the more "symptoms" our bodies may produce. Every little thing, once you read the symptoms of pregnancy, especially if you don't want to be pregnant, seem to show up. For example, one symptom or sign is that the veins in your breasts may become more noticeable, and the area around your nipple may darken...well, when I thought I was pregnant, I got those symptoms in my head, and everything seemed to be happening to me! The morning sickness, the veins becoming more visible in my breasts, along with them looking bigger and swollen, and hurting, and the nipples looking darker...and sometimes it's just our imaginations! We don't pay attention to the color of our nipples when we don't have a reason to, so when we think we have become pregnant, if our nipples look dark, then we begin to get more worried, and so on and so on with other symptoms.

The best advice I can give you IS IF she is late for her period, have her take a home pregnany test. However, if her period date has not come up yet, tell her NOT to worry. If she does, she can and may just cause her period to be late, causing a lot more tension and worry then she already has. Even if she worries herself, you can still have her take an HPT after she is late for her period.

If she does turn out to be pregnant, I PROMISE you everything will be alright, whatever her decision is. Your parents will be upset at first, but if you all love each other, and the know this, they probably will not keep you two from each other because most likely they know a teenager's philosophy: "If they won't let me do it, or see her, then I'll find a way"...because that is what we do...so stay calm, and remember, you two have each other...and you can tell both your parents together, at the same time...tell them you two want to be together, whether you keep the baby, or abort the baby, or give it up for adoption...I'm SURE they will understand. Give them time.

My last piece of advice is, don't worry! UNTIL her period is late. If it's not yet, there is no reason to fret now. It will only make matters worse, and if it is, have her take an HPT, and believe me, if she's pregnant, life will go on, and life WILL be okay. For the both of you...I promise that!! Take care, both of you! And if you need ANYMORE advice at all, you know where to come!

Lots of love to you both...and I wish you the very best of luck!!

(And sorry for the lengthy post, I really hope it helped, though!)

<IMG SRC="http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/heart.gif">




------------------
*-+ AsHLyNn +-*

 
Old 02-06-2003, 05:47 PM   #6
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Eeyore II HB User
Re: My girlfriend may be pregnant... please help.. (15 yrs)

all I can say is ABORTION IS NOT A FORM OF BIRTH CONTROL.if you are not ready for a baby then you should not be having sex.
I do not mean to sound harsh but too many children are having sex without thinking first. you need a condom and she needs birth control.
she should wait until she should have her period and if she doesnt get it then take a home test.I pray she is not pregnant.
good luck please be careful in the future.


------------------
EDD-AUGUST 15
WISHIN FOR A BABY GIRL

 
Old 02-06-2003, 06:47 PM   #7
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fntsyangel HB User
Re: My girlfriend may be pregnant... please help.. (15 yrs)

First, I would like to say that breast tenderness/growth is COMPLETELY normal at 15 years ... at 16 mine grew a full cup size. That aside, is she late for her period? If so, she needs to test, and if not, you (Sorry!) need to wait and see ...

In general, I am not a big fan of abortion, however you were going on complete ignorance as to the presence/content of precum ... lord only know why they stopped offering sex ed in school!! If she is pregnant and that is what you choose to do, then so be it. Be aware that abortion can take a very big emotional toll; but then so can adoption, and so can teen parenthood. Learn from your mistakes and be careful in the future - for both your sakes.

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Angel, et al<p>[This message has been edited by fntsyangel (edited 02-06-2003).]

 
Old 02-06-2003, 06:53 PM   #8
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Chelle1977 HB User
Re: My girlfriend may be pregnant... please help.. (15 yrs)

I wanted to add one thing - its not unusual for a girl to miss her period after her first sexual experience. If your girlfriend doesn't get her period when she expects it, she should go ahead and test, but do NOT FREAK OUT. The other poster was right about head-symptoms.

If your girlfriend is pregnant, she needs to go to a clinic or a doctor and find out what her options are. Abortion is not always the answer. There are other choices. Please consider them. There are a lot of people would will happily adopt a newborn baby.

If your girlfriend is not pregnant, she needs to go to a clinic or a doctor and learn about her options for birth control. And she needs to choose the one best for her. There are several.

If you are going to continue to be sexually active, you need to go to a clinic, or the drugstore, and get condoms.

Neither of you should have to tell your parents about the trips to the clinic, but I imagine both sets of parents would like to know that you are considering sex (no reason to tell them you already have had sex if she's not pregnant). TALK to your parents. They know a lot about sex - they can answer questions and keep you from getting into dangerous situations.

 
Old 02-06-2003, 07:48 PM   #9
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crazy2tryagain HB User
Re: My girlfriend may be pregnant... please help.. (15 yrs)

Your gf definately needs to take a pg test. If your afraid to buy one you may have a clinic in your area that you can go to for free to test her. I know we have one called Birthright or Planned Parenthood. They offer advice if you are pregnant (freedom of choice) and protection if she's not!

No one ever intends to get pg at the age of 15. However, if you've been dating this girl for 2 years, I would think your parents would be concerned about the fact that you'd be curious about sex. It's time to talk to them and take responsibility for your future.

Good Luck

J

 
Old 02-07-2003, 09:08 AM   #10
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lovelyme HB User
Re: My girlfriend may be pregnant... please help.. (15 yrs)

From experience, after my first time and many girls first times, you psych yourself out and start feeling symptoms that are not really there as much as you make them out to be. Now pregnancy IS a possibility and I am not saying she is or isn't, but it is VERY COMMON to tell yourself that this is it for you and that you are pregnant. You mentioned abortion as if she has made that decision or is that what you ASSUME she will do? You do know adoption is an option. If she is pregnant, your child already has a heartbeat. Well, good luck and here's to wearing protection for now on if indeed all works out well for you and her.

------------------
Marie
Baby's Arrival Expected August 2, 2003

 
Old 02-07-2003, 09:15 AM   #11
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MilkNKisses HB User
Re: My girlfriend may be pregnant... please help.. (15 yrs)

I know abortion is a very sensitive subject here, especially given the fact that so many women here are TTC.

I would hope though, that we would be respectful of everyone’s personal decisions even if they are ones that we ourselves wouldn’t make.

I am not saying to council people to have an abortion if that is something you are against, just don’t rush to judgment on a woman who may chose a path different from yours.

These kids are very young, and its up to them to make their decisions and their parents to council them.

Please, just don’t jump all over someone for wanting something different than you. Understanding is sooo very important .. they need that now too regardless of if she is pregnant or not.

Just my 2 cents. Don't hate me for it.

 
Old 02-07-2003, 09:18 AM   #12
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HEAVEN-SENT HB User
Re: My girlfriend may be pregnant... please help.. (15 yrs)

I don't think anyone was jumping down his throat...I think they were just reminding him that abortion is not the ONLY option and that there are other alternatives.

Thats how I took everyones responses anyway.

------------------
EDD 10/3/03

 
Old 02-07-2003, 10:52 AM   #13
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Re: My girlfriend may be pregnant... please help.. (15 yrs)

I agree...I dont think that anyone was jumping down anyone's throat. Actually, (no offense) I think that the ppl who responded on the abortion topic handled it very delicatly...I know that once or twice before that topic got pretty heated!! I think these girls handled it very well <IMG SRC="http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/smile.gif"> <IMG SRC="http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/smile.gif"> I also think there are more options than abortion. Please, make sure you think EVERYTHING through before you make that dreadful decision. But as always..that's just MY opinion!!

 
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