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Old 09-14-2003, 02:41 PM   #1
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Post Whats wrong with me?!

Hello. I have never posted here before, so forgive me if this seems stupid. I also posted this on another board, but haven't had any replies yet. I'll just be blunt.

I want to have a baby. The feelings of wanting a child have been overwhelming to me around the time of my cycle and I think about it other times too. I am in a wonderful, loving relationship but the both of us know that having a baby right now would probably not be the best thing. We would like to be more stable (finished with college) and perhaps a little older. I talk with my partner about these feelings often and by the time of my cycle it's all I can think about! Are these feelings realated to hormones or do I really want to have a baby? LOL, I know it's a stupid qestion, but I don't know why I would be wanting a baby so badly right now. Does anyone know if these feelings could just be something to do with my cycle/hormones? I would appreciate any support and information regarding my somewhat insane problem. Thanks!
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Old 09-14-2003, 03:14 PM   #2
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What you have is a very seroius condition called "Baby Fever!" It is soooooo totally hormonal. I remember staring to feel this way when I was 21. It is very stong sometimes. It gets worse when you actually see a baby. For me, it came and went in phases it even sort of dwindled off when I was about 25. Now I am 28 and actually pregnant. I'm glad I waited until I had a stable career/relationship. I want my family to have everything it needs. This pregnancy wasn't planned, but it is welcome. I don't know if I would have gone down the same path at 21. It's a pretty huge, life changing decision. I always thought about the relationship I was in and wondered if I wanted to be connected to that guy for the rest of my life. Usually it was no....until now.

Just remember, the feelings you have about wanting (almost needing) a baby are so normal. Why else would there be so many people?

------------------
Christine,
due with #1 Jan 22, 2004
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Christine,
due with #1 Feb 3, 2004 It's a Boy!!!

 
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Old 09-14-2003, 06:01 PM   #3
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Chrissy, thanks a lot for taking time to reply to me, and congrats on your pregnancy! I hope this goes away soon, it's driving me insane. lol. I've asked myself the same question you mentioned and the answer was always a big 'no'. Until now, which I guess is why I came down with Baby Fever! :P Anyway, thanks so much for your reply and I hope you have a great pregnancy!
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Old 09-14-2003, 08:39 PM   #4
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Oh yes, Vegan!

I am 21 years old, a college student, with my 31 year old DF. And I really want one too. I think it is because I, too have found that one to say yes, I will spend the rest of my life with him. In the past, and I do have one, I would have said "no". It's like I want something or someone, that represents "us". I want to be a mother. OH believe me, I have Baby Fever. I am tring to cure it, either by trying to have one, or warding the thought off.

 
Old 09-14-2003, 11:17 PM   #5
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Just in my opinion, it sounds like you're ready to be a mommy. Like almost everyone told me, if you wait til your financially stable, married, career, etc. you'll never have a baby. We are not married, not rich but not poor, and I am sooo glad that I am a mommy. If I could go back, I wouldn't change a thing!

 
Old 09-15-2003, 02:29 PM   #6
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Hey 911_Mom, thanks for your post. You're right, I am SOOO ready to be a Mom. However, my family doesn't agree and that is upsetting. As for my SO, he doesn't like to talk about it. I know he just wants to be more stable, and I understand that. It's really getting to me though, sometimes I find myself wishing that somehow something happened and I was pregnant, because I know then that everyone would welcome it. Crazy, I know. But for now, I'm just waiting I suppose. lol. Thanks for the replies everyone! Anyone else?
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Old 09-15-2003, 03:13 PM   #7
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heidilynn74 HB User
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I have 4 biological children and 1 adopted child. I don't have any regrets. I know how you feel about family not agreeing. My youngest is 8 weeks old, if someone asks me if we are going to have more, in front of my Mother she replies for me. When in fact we are considering one more maybe when Cade is 2 or 3. I suspect I'm pregnant now, kinda. I'm not sure though. Won't my mom have a cow lol

 
Old 09-15-2003, 05:12 PM   #8
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I was in your shoes. I got married when I was 20, and I couldn't wait to have a baby. My DH was older and had a good job going, but I really thought I should wait until I finished school. The stay-at-home mom thing is not for me, and I knew I'd want to be a working mom...so I managed to wait. I'm 22, graduated in May, and now I'm 3 months pregnant. It was hard to wait, and some people still think I'm young, but I'm glad I waited a couple of years. At the time, it seemed like eternity. I would constantly calculate the timing, thinking "Okay, if I got pregnant at this time, I would have the baby here, and graduate here." I know it's hard...especially when you're ready, but I'm glad I waited the short time.

 
Old 09-15-2003, 05:15 PM   #9
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amashstat HB User
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I was in your shoes. I got married when I was 20, and I couldn't wait to have a baby. My DH was older and had a good job going, but I really thought I should wait until I finished school. The stay-at-home mom thing is not for me, and I knew I'd want to be a working mom...so I managed to wait. I'm 22, graduated in May, and now I'm 3 months pregnant. It was hard to wait, and some people still think I'm young, but I'm glad I waited a couple of years. At the time, it seemed like eternity. I would constantly calculate the timing, thinking "Okay, if I got pregnant at this time, I would have the baby here, and graduate here." I know it's hard...especially when you're ready, but I'm glad I waited the short time.

 
Old 09-15-2003, 08:36 PM   #10
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Thanks to all my new replies. My SO and I have talked and he is very understanding. Having children is SOOO important to me, but if I wait a few more years I will be able to be with my family a lot more... So I'm going to try and hang in there for two or three more years! Until then, I guess I can dream about it. It's so hard. I want to thank everyone that's replied (as of now) for all their help and support. At least I get to read about all the new babies on here! *lol* Take care everyone!
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Old 09-15-2003, 09:51 PM   #11
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Talking

One more thought, do you have any friends or relatives that have babies? Or maybe you could babysit a few hours a week. That would probably help ease the want to have one right now.

 
Old 09-16-2003, 09:54 AM   #12
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i also was married at 20 and wanted to have a baby so bad. dh wanted us to wait...he wanted us to be more secure etc but i kept nagging him year after year LOL (not too terribly much but quite a bit) i finally decided that i wouldn't bug him anymore and that i would wait until he felt ready. i was really really scared that he still wouldn't feel ready until i was almost 40 and i did tell him that a few times. well this spring he totally surprised me and said it's time and he wants to have a baby.....Iím 27 now and heís 32. i am sooooo happy! we are trying really hard but it's not happening very easy for us. we are both seeing the dr. and it appears the problem is me not him so hopefully we'll get to the bottom of it all and finally have our baby!!

although i would have welcomed a baby at any time i'm very glad that we waited and had time to focus on our relationship. we are both much more emotionally stable then we were when we got married.

i hope it works out for you no matter what you decide and that your happy. i totally understand your NEED for a baby though...that is how i felt (and FEEL NOW...LOL!)

 
Old 09-17-2003, 08:43 PM   #13
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Hey, just me again. Just wanted to say thanks to the new replies.
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Old 09-18-2003, 11:11 PM   #14
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I TOTALLY know what you're talking about!!!! About one year ago I had baby fever so bad I was contemplating having an "accident" with the BC. I'm glad I didn't though. I would never be able to live with myself. Anyway, turns out I was just bored. So I went back to school. I am in college now, and the baby fever is coming back. It's not as bad this time beacuse I live with my husband and my best firne and her husband and 2.5 year old. The kid really keeps my head on my shoulders if you know what I mean.
I have about 6 more years of college and then I'll be in the right place for a baby, right now it would just mess everything up.
I can't control it though, sometimes I feel CRAZY because I know it's not the right time for us. I've got babies enough as it is-2 cats and a dog...not to mention neices and nephews and friends kids.

I just want my own....
Good luck with the baby fever.

 
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