Pregnancy Depression and PPD PTSD
Hello all: I'm not sure if I'm depressed or just getting anxious about being depressed. Talking to a Dr. about my problem is not going to happen. I've yet to find one who doesn't want to "write-off" my problems on a presc pad. I am 27 weeks pregnant. Although I have never experienced PPD before (six pregnancies) I did on the last one. The birth was a nightmare, blood bath, botch job. My daughter was taken to another hospital and it could have all been avoided. I chalked my feelings afterwards up to PTSD. It was the worst mental state I've ever been in or ever imagined and lasted a full six or seven months. Now I am starting to sort of panic that the same thing is going to happen again. I am imagining everything in a negative light. I just can't seem to shake these feelings and I'm terrified I'm going to create my very own depression. Anyone else ever experience this? I just can not do this again.
I'm even starting to detach from the idea that I'm pregnant. There have been only three people that I've even discussed the pregnancy with. It's as if it isn't even happening.