It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Rape / Sexual Abuse Message Board
Post New Thread   Closed Thread
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 12-21-2004, 06:26 PM   #1
Senior Member
(female)
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Central of USA
Posts: 132
dd annie HB User
Do you ever get over sexual abuse?

Do you ever get over sexual abuse? I was just wondering. I was abused as a young child and just recently shared with my husband and family. I had hidden for years, and it dawned on me one day that that could be the problem with me mentally. I do not like to get close to any men, hugging any one was uncomfortable to me, and I was very timid. I was abused by my real father and my mom had divorced him when I was young but on weekends he had my sister and me. I have decided not to have anything to do with my dad, but I still feel like there isn't any closure. What can I do to put this behind me and move on?

Annie

 
Old 12-21-2004, 08:25 PM   #2
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: USA
Posts: 542
Mecpcpj HB User
Re: Do you ever get over sexual abuse?

I think that it is very difficult to get over sexual abuse alone. When you start to open up to someone close to you that you can confide in you may start to feel relieved that you told someone. This is why so many abused people have to go to therapy. Therapy helps you put the past behind you and move on. It's just such a burden to go through alone!

 
Sponsors Lightbulb
   
Old 12-22-2004, 01:34 PM   #3
Member
(female)
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Posts: 55
dinobites HB User
Re: Do you ever get over sexual abuse?

I don't think anyone can ever "get over" sexual abuse. It's a very tramatic thing that changes people forever. But, people do learn to deal with it better, and learn to life a happy life. There is hope for you. I also suggest counseling. I'm so sorry you were abused as a child. I hope the future holds peace for you.

 
Old 12-25-2004, 04:52 AM   #4
Newbie
(male)
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 6
ws127903 HB User
Re: Do you ever get over sexual abuse?

Hello, my ex wife told me finally after 3 years of marriage (we were together 10 years) that she was abused as a child. When she told me that, I researched all I could and found out that people that were sexually abused as a child will often times take it out on their spouses. i.e. be distant, no intimacy, mean, etc... It caused the breakup of my marriage. I tried everything in the world to please her but she would have nothing to do with me. All was good for the first 7 years. Love was aplenty but one day it all changed and nothing I did pleased her. S he would not go to counseling. She said she had forgiven her grandfather and dad for doing it to her and turned it over to God but I was still on the receiving end of her rath. I believe that only seeing a shrink or counselor would help her to not take it out on me so please seek help because this can manifest itself later in life at some point and cause damage that can't be repaired.
hope this helps

 
Old 12-26-2004, 03:25 PM   #5
Senior Veteran
(male)
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Bean Station, TN, usa
Posts: 2,190
mudhound HB User
Re: Do you ever get over sexual abuse?

one can never forget, but, we can and have to move on. The wife's mother was frequently having sex with someone other than her dad whole she was in the back seat of the car! I do not care much for her to this day. However, the wife seems to have came to an end of her disrespect for her mother.
__________________
God Bless

Mudhound

 
Old 12-30-2004, 07:36 PM   #6
Newbie
(female)
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 2
cjb1971 HB User
Re: Do you ever get over sexual abuse?

I was sexually abused by my mothers boyfriend from the time I was 3 until almost 10. I tried to tell my mother a few times but she listened to him when he told her he didn't do it. Once I was older I just kept my distance from him and then moved out of my house at a very young age. I went through many years of therapy in my teen years and when I was in my mid 20's I confronted him in front of my mother. I had been in therapy from the time I was 15 and it wasn't until I confronted him that I felt like I was starting to heal. I am now 33 and I will never be free of being a sexual abuse survivor but I feel like I am free of being a sexual abused victim! In my opinion the best thing to do is to face the secret head on and surround yourself with people who support you.

cjb

 
Old 09-21-2006, 07:24 PM   #7
Senior Member
(female)
 
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: USA
Posts: 258
Sehsun HB User
Exclamation Re: Do you ever get over sexual abuse?

To Annie and everyone else:
I don't know if I will ever get over my experience with SA. I believe that healing does happen, but I will certainly never forget. I think that healing is a long process, and you need the support of loving family and friends to help you through it. Also therapy may help. I suggest maybe reading some books about healing from sexual abuse. One that really helped me was The Courage To Heal by Ellen Bass and Laura Davis. I "broke the silence" in 2002 - I told someone that I had been sexually abused when I was a child. I even told my parents (very hard thing to do). It was not until 2004 when I started to come to terms with it. I will always be on the road to healing, but I look back and see how much I have grown through this. I realize that this post is a couple years old, but I hope that you take/are taking your time through recovery. I hope all is well.

 
Closed Thread

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
I can't get out of my depression! Anonymous82 Depression 6 03-30-2009 09:54 AM
sexual abuse luvmy3girls Rape / Sexual Abuse 7 01-15-2009 01:53 AM
i really do not think this will ever end pucca_chick Depression 5 01-14-2008 06:01 PM
False sexual abuse claims by autistic child autisticsis Mental Health 8 05-25-2007 12:04 PM
How to help girlfriend cope with childhood sexual abuse? David_002 Family & Friends of the Mentally Ill 6 03-09-2007 09:18 PM




Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




Join Our Newsletter

Stay healthy through tips curated by our health experts.

Whoops,

There was a problem adding your email Try again

Thank You

Your email has been added








TOP THANKED CONTRIBUTORS



Phoenix (4), jade680 (2), jen52983 (1), Seraph (1), krazy2day (1), ceeceee (1), Basswife (1), Kali333 (1), mercyrightnow (1), TKHawke (1)

Site Wide Totals

teteri66 (1166), MSJayhawk (1000), Apollo123 (899), Titchou (835), janewhite1 (823), Gabriel (758), ladybud (747), sammy64 (668), midwest1 (665), BlueSkies14 (610)



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 03:05 AM.



Site owned and operated by HealthBoards.comô
Terms of Use © 1998-2014 HealthBoards.comô All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!