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-   -   I don't know if I was raped...please help (http://www.healthboards.com/boards/rape-sexual-abuse/591249-i-dont-know-if-i-raped-please-help.html)

WritingAPuppy 03-25-2008 08:08 PM

I don't know if I was raped...please help
 
Hi guys I really need help.

When I was about 10 or 11, I went to my mom's friend's place to spend the night. It was hot so I only wore my underpants. The next day, I found blood on my panties. I never told anyone about it, however it's bothered me to this day.

Was I raped? Was the blood from the popping of my cherry in my sleep, or was it menarche? I do remember my period started about 6 months after that, however I am under the impression that menarche is more than just a speck of blood. Also a couple years later when I first used a tampon I remember it hurt really badly, so it could mean that my humen was intact...however I really don't know.

Is it possible for a girl to be raped in her sleep without her realising it? Is there any way that I can test for my virginity? Please help me, this has haunted me for more than a decade. I need to know if I am still a virgin (never had sex). Any questions just ask.

niknak77 03-25-2008 09:05 PM

Re: I don't know if I was raped...please help
 
Is there any reason other than the blood that would make you think that you were raped? If not, then my guess would be that you were not. Considering how young you were, and that you were/are a virgin, I don't think you would be able to simply sleep through a rape. I doubt that anybody could, unless they were unconscious, not just asleep. If you had been penetrated at such a young age I would think that intercourse would be very uncomfortable or painful-more likely. You would have felt something the next morning when you woke up, most likely sore, if it was your first time and being such a young child still. My opinion is that it was simply spotting, especially since you got your period soon afterwards. Rest assured that you are still a virgin and were most likely not raped.

WritingAPuppy 03-25-2008 09:07 PM

Re: I don't know if I was raped...please help
 
[QUOTE=niknak77;3502559]Is there any reason other than the blood that would make you think that you were raped? If not, then my guess would be that you were not. Considering how young you were, and that you were/are a virgin, I don't think you would be able to simply sleep through a rape. I doubt that anybody could, unless they were unconscious, not just asleep. If you had been penetrated at such a young age I would think that intercourse would be very uncomfortable or painful-more likely. You would have felt something the next morning when you woke up, most likely sore, if it was your first time and being such a young child still. My opinion is that it was simply spotting, especially since you got your period soon afterwards. Rest assured that you are still a virgin and were most likely not raped.[/QUOTE]

Thank you for your words they are most re-assuring.

What is "spotting", though?

niknak77 03-25-2008 09:18 PM

Re: I don't know if I was raped...please help
 
Spotting is just what it sounds like, instead of a steady flow of blood you simply see "spots" of it. Sometimes just once, or off and on, as menstral cycles tend to be a bit unpredictable at times; especially when we are young.

Kszan 03-26-2008 09:10 AM

Re: I don't know if I was raped...please help
 
I agree, I really believe that had you been raped, there is no way you would have slept through it, because being a virgin and given your age at the time, it would have been very painful for you. You would have surely woken up if that were the case.

I agree that it was probably just a precursor to the actual start of your period.

Have you sought some counseling? Because I'm sure that this has weighed very heavy on your mind and it might help if you talked with someone about your feelings.

jen52983 03-26-2008 12:15 PM

Re: I don't know if I was raped...please help
 
I have to agree with Niknak77. If you were able, by some chance, to sleep through rape or being touched inappropriately, it would be very likely that you'd be in pain and/or sore the next day. I think its more likely that it was spotting.. especially since you did get your period soon after.

tUrRrRa 03-26-2008 03:48 PM

Re: I don't know if I was raped...please help
 
Unless something strange was going on and you remember more happening, I don't think you were raped. Do you remember any pain the next day to go along with the blood? If you were raped, there would most likely be soreness... Some people don't hurt their first time, but if it were rape and by force, I would imagine you would feel soreness for sure.

You can definitely consider counseling if this is really bothering you. Sometimes you just need someone to talk to and some reassurance. Was there anyone else at the house? Any men that did not know you well? It sounds like everything was okay, and I agree that it could be spotting before you got your period. It's normal for your period to be irregular at first, so a bit of bleeding and then your period coming later on can happen for sure.

della1 03-26-2008 04:09 PM

Re: I don't know if I was raped...please help
 
I think that these past 10 years of worry have been for nothing, just the imagination of a 10 year old who had no idea what sex is like like and figured that someone could actually sleep through a rape. It's not possible.

(And if you have never had intercourse, you are still a virgin.)

Monkey7935 03-29-2008 01:15 AM

Re: I don't know if I was raped...please help
 
Hon, I understand your scared. I was raped, but while I was awake. The ONLY way you could have been is if someone drugged you like giving you some medicine thats bad for you in a drink. Or you would of woke up. I think it was just spotting like others say. But if you really, really want to know and if you havent had sex with anyone, then you can go to your doctor who is a gyn (the doctor for female parts), and she can do an exam and tell you. You can always talk to your parents too. My mom forgot to tell me about becoming a girl because I started my cycle at your age. I bet you were like me, and just started your woman functions a bit early. Usually we are 13 when it happens (the whole parents forget to inform us part cuz we were 3 years early hehe). I remember when I first saw blood I started screaming...I thought I was dying and bleeding internally cuz we just lost a family member from bleeding internally then. I was screaming that I was going to die in the bathroom...my dad rushed and knocked at the door, asked me why I was dying and I told him I was bleeding to death. He asked where the blood was and I told him on my panties..needless to say he laughed and said he was going to get my mom and I wasnt dying. My mom spent the rest of the day convincing me I wasnt going to die LOL. So hun, go to the doctor, and if you are still worried you can always post here and you can also go to a councelor. I'm here for you hon.


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