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Rape / Sexual Abuse Message Board
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Old 11-05-2008, 12:36 PM   #1
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Has anyone that survived Sexual abuse had a healthy relationship??

I'm curious to know if anyone that has gone through sexual abuse as a child grew up and was able to have a healthy/functional lasting relationship?? Is it possible, or is one scarred for life?

 
Old 11-05-2008, 01:25 PM   #2
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Re: Has anyone that survived Sexual abuse had a healthy relationship??

Yes. I was abused sexually from age 7 to 13 by my stepfather. I met my now-husband at age 19, and we've just celebrated our 10th wedding anniversary (we're both 36 now).

The memories of the abuse from those years are much like a broken bone or any other illness/disease from which one heals and recovers. It takes time, patience, love, understanding and a good therapist, but it is absolutely possible to enjoy many healthy relationships (including a spouse/lover, parents, siblings, friends and authority figures) and move on after abuse.

I know it must sound impossible, but please know that there are many, many women and men who've endured physical, mental and/or sexual abuse as children who go on to live very happy and healthy lives as adults. You just need the tools and time to allow yourself to heal.

You're not alone

 
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Old 11-05-2008, 02:01 PM   #3
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Re: Has anyone that survived Sexual abuse had a healthy relationship??

I too was sexual abused as a child by an uncle and I never admitted it or told anyone until I had been married for 7 years.

I have never received therapy to deal with the abuse, but it is not something that I think about everyday.

I have always thought I was fine.

Currently, my DH and I are going through some rough times. He recently told me that I am not sexual enough for him and have never been in all the 23 years we have been married. He feels that some of it is because of what happend when I was a child.

I don't have a definitive answer to your question, but I guess it is very possible in the right circumstances that the abuse can be overcome and a healthy relationship can be enjoyed.

 
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