I'll try to keep this as short as possible...
I live with my boyfriend, and his mom is our landlord, and she lives next door...here's the problem...
The upstairs apartment has been rented to the most obnoxious skanky jerks on earth. Every day I come home and there are at least 3 people here, constantly banging up and down the stairs and all around upstairs, at all hours. i have complained to the landlord (my boyfriend's mom) on several occasions, and she has spoken to them 3 times (after the 3rd time, they got a piano, of all things) and nothing has changed. Now the whole family thinks I am crazy and noone wants to hear about it. What do I do? These people are making me nuts. I try not to let it bother me but it is just not possible. Help!!!!!! http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/blob_fire.gif
No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.
Hate to say it, but since no one else is sharing your anxiety about this your only choices are to tolerate it or move. You can't make your BF's mom do anything she doesn't want to do. Have you tried discussing the situation with those people upstairs yourself? Maybe they really don't appreciate how loud they're being.
Does the family think your boyfriend is crazy too? Have HIM speak to his mother. If she doesn't do anything about it, move. (I'm sensing she's letting you live there rent free ) If she isn't, go over her head and call the police. It's against the law to disurb the peace. If it is rent free, take it or rent your own place.
Last edited by Moderator BAC; 12-09-2003 at 10:05 AM.
unfortunately he is not bothered by it...or so hey says. he is not the type to complain about anything!! and we are not rent free, i wish
but it is hard to feel like i have a problem with his family, they have always been good to me.
No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.
Sometimes neighbors can be so inconsiderate! I know what that's like. At my old house, our neighbors almost always had parties, and cars would be scattered EVERYWHERE. Cars were parked in front of people's driveways...This was late at night, and nobody really needed to leave, but we could hear the music and everything...Solution - we moved...far far FAR away from our old house...we didn't really want to call the cops since it was tolerable, not a matter of life and death or whatever... but it was such a nuisance, so we got outta there!
Bose makes these new headphones that cancel sound or you can hook them to music. They are pricey, but they may be cheaper than your alternatives--moving, offending b/f mom. There is one model that is self contained and one that has a battery pack. I hate RUDE people. Good Luck to you!
Oh, my goodness! They MUST be related to the elephants that live above me!
I swear these people can stomp around and make more noise at all hours of the day and night than anyone else in the world. I often wonder what's going on up there.
I've considered going up there and asking them to quiet it down, but I don't want them to get offended or angry and retaliate. So, I just sit there and hope they stop doing whatever they're doing soon.
I think most apartment building are build to be cheap rather than be soundproof. The floors and walls are always very thin. I don't think I walk hard at all but when I walk around in my apartment I can feel the floor sort of rumble under my feet, and I know I must sound like an elephant to the people below me. I find myself tiptoeing in my own apartment most of the time!! And it sounds like thunder whenever someone goes up or down the steps outside my door because they're just very flimsy. But I think it's just one of the disadvantages of living on the first floor. That's why 2nd and 3rd floor apartments cost more. But see if you can have a nice, sweet corgial conversation with your neighbors and see if they will be willing to try to keep it down during such and such a time of night. Good luck to you.
What's always amazed me is that the people above me really can't seem to understand that they need to be quiet. I live in on the 1st floor of a 3 story building. So, wouldn't the people on the 2nd floor think, "Hmmmm....those people above me sure are stomping around a lot. I wonder if I sound the same way to the people below me. I should probably be more careful, if that's how I sound!" But, alas, they never seem to consider that, for some reason.
my friends are going through the same stuff they rented this apt and they were told an elderly man lived upstairs well p.s. liars! its a korean family and there seems to be about 6 of them in a one bedroom apt, after my friend decorated the whole apt now they may move because its so annoying to them its an apt building complex and the owners live in another state , they made the tenants get carpeting but they dont think they got padding because the noise hasnt changed plus i dont think they know the real amount of people that are living up there good luck i would move if i were you
Your b/f and his mom are exposed to the same noise factor as you, and they are not bothered by it. Maybe they're used to it. Maybe you're more sensitive to noise than they are. Either way, it sounds like YOU are the only one having a problem.
Get used to it, or move out. If you rent another apartment with people upstairs from you, you'll probably have the same problem. Such is the nature of apartment life. If you are the only one in the house complaining about it, you will be seen as a whiner. Everyone is going to get tired of hearing you complain about something that doesn't bother them.
Have you ever had upstairs neighbors before?
The only experience of this I've had is when I used to stay at my girlfriend's place a couple of years ago. There was this dope-smoking, nocturnal fool who seemed to think it was acceptable to play loud music 'til all hours. When I was there it was annoying but we coped 'cos we were often up late anyway since this was the only time we got to see one another. But one time my girlfriend phoned me and she was crying because the guy wouldn't stop his music (despite her constant pleas) and she had a really important presentation to deliver the next day at uni. I felt powerless and it really upset me to see that she was so stressed out. I didn't realise he was so unreasonable until this point.
Well, when I was next there and the music came on again I stormed out of my girlfriend's bedroom, kicked his door down, threw a speaker out of his open window (fifth floor, nobody below ), punched the unit and promptly knocked him out when he lurched his scrawny, doped up body at me. When he came round I advised him to replace the stereo with a walkman and thanked him never to treat my girlfriend the way he did ever again. I was worried that when I was gone he would give her grief but we never heard a peep out of him again. I don't like losing my temper and I don't advise violence, but sometimes it's hard to restrain yourself, I know.
Aww, man, I also have skanky neighbors from Hell. I hear EVERYTHING they do. They get up at 5:30 AM and it's like they're destroying the entire house. How can ANYONE make that much noise getting up?!
But I'm "supposed" to put up with their noise, for some reason. Like when the stupid skanky girlfriend brings her dog over and it's barking its head off at 7 AM on a Sunday. Or when I'm sleeping and their "sleazy sounds" wake me up (their bedroom is under mine). Or when I'm trying to sleep and they're having loud parties that make the entire building shake - whatever!
But when I play some Radiohead at at reasonable volume at 8 PM, they're bloody banging on the walls/ceiling! I hate them SO much...
I am at the other end -- I am the 2nd floor tenant who "annoyed" (an understatement) the 1st floor tenant. She was the landlord's girlfriend, and the two of them plus their young son used to live in the bottom. When he rented to us we already had one kid, and I've since had another.
Well they split up and she stayed and he moved a few blocks away, but he had lived below us for several years. We are very quiet about our TV and music and also never have anyone over -- maybe once or twice a year -- the only noise factor are my two small children. And it's normal stuff, they have no loud toys or anything, it's just them running or falling when they play.
One day (a few months ago) as I was going in the woman came out and said we had to talk. I listened as she asked me to try and keep my kids quieter after about 8:30 pm at night as that is when her son goes to bed. I thought that was reasonable and didn't even know that my kids were that audible to her until then.
Just a few weeks later, the landlord came and said that he would like us to move out soon, that this woman has been bitching about us ever since we moved in!!!!!!!! He said that the entire time he lived there he was not in the least bit bothered by us, and that she would wake him up and say she heard noises from upstairs and she couldn't stand it, etc. etc. Well you can imagine how upset I was, I lived there for about 6 years not even knowing there was a problem, then was told about a problem and had my kids tone it down, but then was asked to leave only a few weeks later!!!!!
Fortunately (for me at least) the landlord changed his mind and said we can stay or leave whenever we want. I don't speak to the downstairs neighbor at all as I heard her screaming on her phone one day that we were a$$ho!e$, etc. She knew we already had a kid when we moved in, and also she has a kid who runs and jumps and plays (I can hear him banging on the stairs and stuff but it doesn't bother me), so I really think she must be overly sensitive to noises (unless she's making them oc course) --
-- in your case, you said the landlord spoke to these people several times already and nothing improved? Maybe you should bring some of your friends over and get their opinion on the noise level. If they really are being a disturbance you can file a complaint I believe (which is something my downstairs neighbor couldn't do).