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Old 07-28-2002, 08:54 PM   #1
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Location: Ontario, Canada
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coco08 HB User
Question Should I call this guy again?

Can someone offer some advise??

To make a long story short. I tried to post earlier, but I am new to all of this .....

Would you call this guy again ??. Some facts: I have been dating him for 9 months. I was in a car accident back in erly June and have not been feeling well, and am off work. I have been feeling down and depressed about the whole thing.

I saw him a week ago, and I was with a headache and feeling down when he came. Needless to say, I did not have much to talk about. He stayed for about 4 hours.

I did not talk to him on Sunday, he did not call and neither did I. I called him on Monday, and Tuesday and left messages to call me. He did not. On Wed, his number was on my phone, no message and I have not heard from him since.

Today, I called again. I think this is it for me I am stubborn and have even surprised myself that I called. I told him this is my 3rd time calling and I will not be a nuisance if he want to talk that he should call.

Did I do the right thing and should I call again.

BTW: I am 36, 2 kids. To old for this nonsense.

 
Old 07-28-2002, 10:03 PM   #2
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Cutebeagle2 HB User
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First of all Hi Canada nice place eh!! As far as
your friend goes we think it's best to move on.
He hasn't called and if he was interested he would
leave you a message. Besides you don't to get hurt
and let someone place with you emotionally. Maybe
one of those dating services may help like match or
lava life. But I wouldn't call him anymore your
wasting your time, and this advice is from a guy who
is around your age.

 
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Old 07-29-2002, 04:42 AM   #3
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coco08 HB User
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Thanks for the advise, c-b2. It was nice to get someone elses opinion. He always told me that he would die if we broke up and he saw me with someone else. He knows that I can get another guy in a second if that is what I wanted. I lost alot of sleep over it, last night but each day that he does not call is getting easier.


 
Old 07-29-2002, 07:14 PM   #4
Blue4U2
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9 months and he can't hang with you not being talkative?

Move on sweety. You and your children deserve a healthy non co-dependent, dysfunctional situation.

HAng in there.

Blue

 
Old 07-30-2002, 08:32 AM   #5
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livenlearn HB User
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i agree...... this "nonsense" may be bearable at the beginning of a relationship.... but, not after 9 months.... i would always play these stupid games too... "should i call him, no, i won't, let him call me"...... after a MUCH needed lesson, and break from men about 6 months ago.... i met my b/f... and he's just wonderful... and has NEVER played these phone games with me.... but, he has told me that he's never not played the games except with me... (and the reason??? cause he's totally in love with me).... anyway, now that i have this..... i can look back and say how ridiculous and stupid i was for hanging onto "relationships" (if ya wanna call them that) when the man wasn't being anywhere near respectful...

i know that sounds harsh to break up with someone over "pettiness".. but, like you... i'm 31 and have 2 children... don't have time for the bulls*hit.....

 
Old 07-30-2002, 12:24 PM   #6
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truefull HB User
Wink

Nine months is a long time to give up on if you care about him. He may think you don't want to talk to him. After sitting there Sunday with no conversation 4 hours because of an accident that happened over a month ago? ThirtySix? the clock is ticking. True you may be able to get another guy in a second, but one that wants an instant family is hard to find IMO.

 
Old 07-31-2002, 06:04 AM   #7
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coco08 HB User
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Well I just wanted to bring up up to date. It is Wed and he has still not called. Each day is getting easier for me. (thanks everyone for their opinion...I really mean that). I don't think he is the one for me. I am suffering from post traumatic syndrome after the bad crash and now is any is the time that I need him and he is not there for me.

Someone said that I am 36 with 2 kids, and am not getting any younger. Well he is 38 and has 5 kids and I accepted him as such because of my love for children.

I keep hangin in thanks for your support. He will regret it because I know the kind of woman I am.

 
Old 07-31-2002, 10:08 AM   #8
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EEWMKM HB User
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The clock may be ticking, but I think you made the right decision. How many people, especially women, rush into/stay in bad relationships because they're afraid to be alone for the rest of their lives. You'll meet someone else...who appreciates you on your good and bad days.

 
Old 07-31-2002, 03:44 PM   #9
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dee10 HB User
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Hi there. I say this with the utmost respect for your dignity and person...you are smart, intelligent and I'm sure owing to your maternal wit, very intuitive. Drop the loser and get on with taking care of yourself. In my humble opinion, it's not a matter of who's calling whom; the man does not have the maturity or wherewithal to deal w/ life's problems. What's this business he hasn't called? It's a matter of thought and concern. I know men are cold and some aren't "touchy-feely" but you certainly want someone to be there in body and spirit. The guy should be taking care of your every need (physical/mental). Set a good example for your kids and drop his sorry a--. Don't compromise your conviction for a loser, and, 9 months is nothing, to him it's probably like 9 days.
Take care, sorry about my ranting, it's genuine.
God speed in your recovery.

 
Old 07-31-2002, 03:45 PM   #10
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dee10 HB User
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Hi there. I say this with the utmost respect for your dignity and person...you are smart, intelligent and I'm sure owing to your maternal wit, very intuitive. Drop the loser and get on with taking care of yourself. In my humble opinion, it's not a matter of who's calling whom; the man does not have the maturity or wherewithal to deal w/ life's problems. What's this business he hasn't called? It's a matter of thought and concern. I know men are cold and some aren't "touchy-feely" but you certainly want someone to be there in body and spirit. The guy should be taking care of your every need (physical/mental). Set a good example for your kids and drop his sorry a--. Don't compromise your conviction for a loser, and, 9 months is nothing, to him it's probably like 9 days.
Take care, sorry about my ranting, it's genuine.
God speed in your recovery.

 
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