It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Relationship Health Message Board
Post New Thread   Closed Thread
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 04-23-2004, 12:05 AM   #1
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: ottawa, ontario, canada
Posts: 2,222
jinglebts HB Userjinglebts HB User
Angry my husband needs a job ...

... and not for the reason you think (altho' living a tad above the poverty line would be good); no, we get on each other's nerves!! aaaauuuugggghhhhh!! ... b/c we're broke, and spend all day every day together ... it's awful (truly) ... he says mean things to me, and is more and more depressed every day (so breaking up would hurt him, you see) ...

aw nuts .. just had one of our nightly awful fights ... i'm getting fed up ...



jb
__________________
keep the faith ...

 
Old 04-23-2004, 12:36 AM   #2
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Washington
Posts: 33
noseyone HB User
Re: my husband needs a job ...

do either of you work?

that's one thing i could not stand...there's no reason he can't work, even if it's a low paying job.
__________________
umm, yeah...

 
Sponsors Lightbulb
   
Old 04-23-2004, 01:07 AM   #3
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: ottawa, ontario, canada
Posts: 2,222
jinglebts HB Userjinglebts HB User
Talking Re: my husband needs a job ...

Quote:
Originally Posted by noseyone
do either of you work?

that's one thing i could not stand...there's no reason he can't work, even if it's a low paying job.
i'm on disability, and he's looking for something in hi-tech -- a victim of the hi-tech meltdown ... in his defense, he's so well qualified that we never thought it would take 8 months to find a job ...

but it's still awful ...

jb
__________________
keep the faith ...

 
Old 04-23-2004, 03:24 AM   #4
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 1,589
GirlHarley HB User
Re: my husband needs a job ...

Quote:
Originally Posted by jinglebts
i'm on disability, and he's looking for something in hi-tech -- a victim of the hi-tech meltdown ... in his defense, he's so well qualified that we never thought it would take 8 months to find a job ...

but it's still awful ...

jb

well, Sorry to hear about your troubles...I would go crazy with my fiance was home 24/7 with no job and to boot...Say "mean" things to you...It's not Your fault he's laid off....

Is he collecting Unemployment? Has he filed for an extention? Why doesn't he go work part-time somewhere, so he can continue to work even if it's partime...AND you can do this with collecting Unemployment.......
Is he networking? Been to headhunters? YES, I know too well about the job market because I too am unemployed & collecting unemployment...My Jot went Overseas..and I'm out of health insurance for the time being.

He's got to stay busy & focus that he will find a job...Taking his frustrations out on you is not going to solve anything...Also, even though your out on Disablitly...You took can work part time some place unless you can not get out of your house?

Good Luck

 
Old 04-23-2004, 03:56 AM   #5
Inactive
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 551
Salinas1 HB User
Re: my husband needs a job ...

Quote:
Originally Posted by jinglebts
i'm on disability, and he's looking for something in hi-tech -- a victim of the hi-tech meltdown ... in his defense, he's so well qualified that we never thought it would take 8 months to find a job ...

but it's still awful ...

jb
What is his IT specialty? What is his degree or certification level?

 
Old 04-23-2004, 07:25 AM   #6
Senior Veteran
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: south carolina
Posts: 978
excaliburgrl HB User
Re: my husband needs a job ...

it's very frustrating in the job market today...i've been looking for months myself...but i think i would go crazy if both of us were home...looking for a job IS a full time job...is he looking much or not at all...

 
Old 04-23-2004, 07:30 AM   #7
Senior Veteran
 
Join Date: Dec 2003
Posts: 775
jojo64 HB User
Re: my husband needs a job ...

Has he tried IT temp agencies? Many companies have cut their IT staff and are using temps or contrators for work that used to be done in-house.

 
Old 04-23-2004, 07:35 AM   #8
Inactive
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Easton, Pa
Posts: 734
promisez HB User
Re: my husband needs a job ...

Do some volunteer work. It will get you out of the house and I've found that half the time its the spouse that finds the contact for the new job. You never know who you will meet and that helps immensely when most companies hire word of mouth now instead of advertising.

 
Old 04-23-2004, 07:50 AM   #9
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
trystme's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 1,101
trystme HB Usertrystme HB Usertrystme HB Usertrystme HB Usertrystme HB Usertrystme HB User
Re: my husband needs a job ...

I agree, find some way to get out of the house for a while each day. Or send him out if he'll go. Let him do the grocery shopping for example. It can be difficult when couples spend TOO much time together. That is no excuse for treating you badly though. To me, there is a difference between him just getting on your nerves and actually treating you badly.

 
Old 04-23-2004, 08:29 AM   #10
Inactive
 
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: ma
Posts: 9,639
eightball61 HB User
Re: my husband needs a job ...

He may need a job which will calm things around the house hold but do you really thing is going to stop him from being mean? You mentioned that you are Fed up....Well make a stand and let him know that you are out if he doesn't out the crap.

Whats the point of being treated like dirt? Is this because he is mad at himself for not having a job and the only way to make him feel better is crap on you?

This isn't a good guy and you don't need to be treated like this. So why are you?

 
Old 04-24-2004, 06:58 AM   #11
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: ottawa, ontario, canada
Posts: 2,222
jinglebts HB Userjinglebts HB User
Talking Re: my husband needs a job ...

Quote:
Originally Posted by promisez
Do some volunteer work. It will get you out of the house and I've found that half the time its the spouse that finds the contact for the new job. You never know who you will meet and that helps immensely when most companies hire word of mouth now instead of advertising.
that's a great idea -- my thyroid's "gone south" on me, so i'm still a little weak (i usually post on the thyroid board), but i've been thinking of that, esp. with a theatre company that i'm familiar with ...

thanks for your help ...
jb
__________________
keep the faith ...

 
Old 04-24-2004, 07:10 AM   #12
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: ottawa, ontario, canada
Posts: 2,222
jinglebts HB Userjinglebts HB User
Talking Re: my husband needs a job ...

Quote:
Originally Posted by excaliburgrl
it's very frustrating in the job market today...i've been looking for months myself...but i think i would go crazy if both of us were home...looking for a job IS a full time job...is he looking much or not at all...
he's certainly looking -- the 'net is full of sites (contract houses, actual jobs) to which you can apply -- but it's sure not a "full-time job" in that respect ... so he gets up every AM and does his thing and then, oh i dunno, does his thing with contacting various contract companies, he had a personal ref. which he followed up toot sweet on thursday ...

we are now trying more "creative" measures ... he's made a list of everyone he knows in the computer biz, every contact, and is going to try calling them, but the thing is, he's quite shy so needs a "script" ... and on and on it goes ...

what kind of job are you looking for? my husband was laid off in the hi tech meltdown, and we always knew that was possible but it never occurred to us it would take this long!!

ah well ... thanks for answering -- i just get a little desperate sometimes ...

jb
__________________
keep the faith ...

 
Old 04-24-2004, 07:12 AM   #13
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: ottawa, ontario, canada
Posts: 2,222
jinglebts HB Userjinglebts HB User
Talking Re: my husband needs a job ...

Quote:
Originally Posted by jojo64
Has he tried IT temp agencies? Many companies have cut their IT staff and are using temps or contrators for work that used to be done in-house.
thanks for your suggestion, and yes he is trying ...

jb
__________________
keep the faith ...

 
Old 04-24-2004, 07:22 AM   #14
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: ottawa, ontario, canada
Posts: 2,222
jinglebts HB Userjinglebts HB User
Re: my husband needs a job ...

Quote:
Originally Posted by GirlHarley
well, Sorry to hear about your troubles...I would go crazy with my fiance was home 24/7 with no job and to boot...Say "mean" things to you...It's not Your fault he's laid off....

Is he collecting Unemployment? Has he filed for an extention? Why doesn't he go work part-time somewhere, so he can continue to work even if it's partime...AND you can do this with collecting Unemployment.......
Is he networking? Been to headhunters? YES, I know too well about the job market because I too am unemployed & collecting unemployment...My Jot went Overseas..and I'm out of health insurance for the time being.

He's got to stay busy & focus that he will find a job...Taking his frustrations out on you is not going to solve anything...Also, even though your out on Disablitly...You took can work part time some place unless you can not get out of your house?

Good Luck

he's been to headhunters, networking, he's collecting unemployment, but what about this extension thing? (we're canadian) ...

but the "headhunters, networking" thing is not as much as he can, and sure not as much as i'd like, so we're working on that ... he made a list of his contacts this week, and see here's the thing: he nearly vomits at the thought of calling them (nerves), so we'll have to work on that too ...

thanks ...
jb
__________________
keep the faith ...

 
Old 04-24-2004, 08:44 AM   #15
Inactive
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 551
Salinas1 HB User
Re: my husband needs a job ...

What is his IT specialty? What is his degree or certification level?

 
Closed Thread

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
Woman seeking my husband tapatia13 Relationship Health 28 09-13-2010 10:46 PM
Worried about my husband tlhalabama Depression 4 04-17-2008 05:49 PM
husband unstable on vacation 4support Family & Friends of the Mentally Ill 80 09-17-2007 04:20 PM
Thoughts of my husband & other women Smartcookie Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) 542 02-04-2006 05:54 PM
Please help my husband! jessejomomma Bipolar Disorder 10 11-09-2005 07:57 AM




Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




Join Our Newsletter

Stay healthy through tips curated by our health experts.

Whoops,

There was a problem adding your email Try again

Thank You

Your email has been added








TOP THANKED CONTRIBUTORS



Kszan (271), rosequartz (251), pendulum (172), Larrylou'smom (164), Seraph (155), cryingforever (132), CadenceA (131), lenvegas (95), writeleft (83), Ely4 (62)

Site Wide Totals

teteri66 (1165), MSJayhawk (1000), Apollo123 (898), Titchou (833), janewhite1 (823), Gabriel (758), ladybud (747), sammy64 (668), midwest1 (665), BlueSkies14 (610)



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 12:42 PM.



Site owned and operated by HealthBoards.comô
Terms of Use © 1998-2014 HealthBoards.comô All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!